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/r/QOTSA Official Band of the Week 21: ALL THEM WITCHES

2020.09.25 13:17 House_of_Suns /r/QOTSA Official Band of the Week 21: ALL THEM WITCHES

Let me ask you a question. If you haven’t listened to Kyuss, are you even a QotSA fan?
I suppose it is possible. Some people can be Peter Gabriel fans without being Genesis fans, or Ozzy Osbourne fans without being Black Sabbath fans, or Audioslave fans without being fans of Soundgarden and Rage Against the Machine. And I am pretty sure that there are Foo Fighters fans out there who are not fans of Nirvana -- probably because Foo Fighters are a way better band than Nirvana.
Yeah, I said it. Come at me.
But QotSA without Kyuss? I can’t see it. Maybe I am biased because I just love the low desert sound. Heavy riffs, lots of fuzz ,and earthquake-inducing bass are my jam. That’s why I love Self-Titled so much and why I feel 18 A.D. is chronically underappreciated as a song, and it is an absolute crime that they don’t play it live.
I know I am not alone in this. Kyuss were a genre defining band that created what we now call Stoner Rock. Bands like Valley of the Sun, King Buffalo, Truckfighters, Stonerror, Sleep, Clutch, Mother Engine, Mondo Generator, Duel, and Fu Manchu all continue to write and perform Stoner Rock today. If you haven’t taken a dive into this scene, I totally envy the fact that you get to experience this music for the first time.
Today we are going to check out a great Stoner Rock band that just dropped a new album a few weeks ago. They have more fuzz than a five day backwoods fishing trip. They have bigger jams than Smucker’s, Welch’s, and Kraft combined. They will make your one-hitter hit a home run. You are gonna want to roll down the windows of your low riding caddy and drive all night through the desert.
Yep, you are in for a treat. This week’s band is ALL THEM WITCHES.
About Them
You are familiar with the Hero’s journey, right? That is the literary trope where our protagonists leave their comfortable little world, are mentored through a series of increasing challenges, find themselves at a low point, overcome obstacles, and return home greater and wiser than before?
As with every story of heroes, our group of adventurers from Nashville Tennessee went on a truly epic journey. Drummer Robby Staebler had just arrived in Nashville from Portland, Oregon and was looking for some buds to start a band. He had rolled up at his new home in the back of a moving van, because his mom had decided that he was just not good enough to ride up front. His dad was conspicuously absent. After meeting a sketchy male role model with a Smashmouth-esque chinstrap beard, he was forced by this would-be academic to enslave a small animal. He then ran away from home to engage in a series of escalating gladiatorial fights for money.
Wait. Shit. That is the plot of Pokemon Emerald, not the story of All Them Witches. Damn free emulators. Such a massive time sink.
Mudkip for the win. You are damn right I’m bringing back that meme.
Where was I? I kinda got distracted there. Oh yeah. Robby Staebler was looking for a band. He met guitarist Ben McLeod in a bar (remember when we could meet people in bars?) and then met aspiring drama student Charles Michael Parks Jr. when he took a job at “a corporate hippie store”. Parks Jr. turned those theatre aspirations into being a great frontman and bass player. The band rounded out their membership with Allan Van Cleave, a friend of Staebler, on keys. All Them Witches took the inspiration for their name from the set-prop book entitled All of Them Witches in the 1968 Roman Polanski Spawn-of-Satan movie Rosemary’s Baby.
Let’s get something else out of the way: Yes, I said Nashville Tennesee. The Buckle of the Bible Belt. The Protestant Vatican. The Athens of the South. The Hot Chicken Capital. Yes, the self-proclaimed Music City is perennially associated with Country music, Gospel music and, to a lesser extent, contemporary Christian Rock. There is a Jazz scene. There are active Barbershop groups. The city is the home of the Grand Ole Opry and the Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum. Hee Haw was shot there. It is a city that, until a few decades ago, still had strong ties to the Confederacy.
How the hell did a Stoner Rock band start there?
Quickly, that’s how.
The band were officially formed in February of 2012 (remember when that year was supposed to be the end of the world? C’mon, Mayans, if you really meant 2020 why didn’t you just say 2020?) and released their first album, Our Mother Electricity, on December 6th, 2012. Being from Nashville, the album was of course released on the German heavy psych label Elektrohasch Schallplatten. So just so we’re clear: Stoner Rock was born in the California Desert and then adopted by a band from Tennessee and released on a German label. I just have one question: Where the fuck is Carmen Sandiego?
To be fair, All Them Witches characterized their debut sound as being ‘psychedelta rock’...which kinda sounds like a knock off version of an X-Man. The album is full of heavy jams. Listeners can expect to hear the influence of the blues mixed with deep fuzz and highly compressed vocals. Until it Unwinds is over eight minutes of rolling swagger that will have you thinking about 50 Million Year Trip. Heavy/Like a Witch has some definite Stone Temple Pilots vibes and is a great opener. The true standout on the album is The Urn, a dark and twisted fable that is really the antithesis of everything one associates with music in the Bible Belt. The album was a declaration of war on everything cheery and pleasant to be found in the Music City, and a bold statement from a band finding its feet.
The band were not entirely happy with the production on Our Mother Electricity. In order to assert themselves, they went ultra low-tech. The released the Extra Pleasant EP in July of 2013. It was recorded on a 4-track cassette tape using only two microphones. Production-wise, it is a step back - but when you listen to it on headphones, you can appreciate the raw talent. It is a weird low-fi follow up and almost like listening to a debut rather than the first album. Listening to this EP is like hearing a Pink Floyd cover band’s first original songs that have been mashed up with Clutch and recorded on an iPhone 4. Even with those limitations, tracks like Sludger will stay with you and are worth your time.
While their first two releases had some modest success, All Them Witches really did not get widespread acclaim until the release of their second full album, Lightning at the Door, in late 2013. Every band that has ever released anything on Bandcamp wants to experience the kind of underground word-of-mouth sensation that this album generated. The album is part-concept, part-thematic and has narrative threads that tie it together (e.g. the two tracks The Marriage of Coyote Woman and The Death of Coyote Woman - clearly, not a happy ending for the titular character). If you loved Songs for the Deaf and Rated R, then this is the album that you are going to want to start with as an introduction to the band. It has some amazing tracks - Funeral for a Great Drunken Bird and When God Comes Back are great on their own - but it is best experienced as a complete album. Do yourself a favor: Find a great set of headphones and listen to it front to back. You’ll thank me.
How do you follow up a concept album that gives you unforeseen popularity and access to a broader audience? Do you, say, create a dark follow-up to it, and find the title for that album in a lyric from a hidden track?
Who the fuck would make a weird choice like that?
All Them Witches took a different route and decided to instead channel their inner Beck. The Effervescent EP came out in June of 2014. There are only two songs, each clocking in at about 25 minutes long. Side A is Effervescent and Side B is Tnecsevreffe. The EP is a Rorschach blot of instrumental music in multiple movements that channels incredible musicality and allows you to superimpose your own meaning on it. It is like listening to Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin have a baby, if that baby was raised listening to coyotes howl and instrumental Kyuss tracks all mashed together on one continuous loop. Fans of the German band Mother Engine will hear definite parallels. The weird thing about Effervescent is its length: it is hard to think of it as an EP, because it is 50 minutes of music. But it has only two tracks, so it can’t really be an album...can it?
Yes, before you start in on me, I know about Sleep’s Dopesmoker. That 2003 one-song album may also have influenced our boys from the Hee Haw city.
So after playing around with longer and more intricate multiple-movement songs, it is no surprise that All Them Witches dropped a 57 minute ‘EP’ in 2015. A Sweet Release hit the airwaves on April 20. Yep, 4/20. No, that was not a coincidence. No, I’m not going to explain that to you. If you gotta ask, you’ll never know. Yes, if anyone doubted at all that this band was a Stoner Rock band, fuck all y’all, the release date is proof. Tracks on the EP range in length from almost 2 and a half minutes to over 24 minutes. It is a spacey, laid-back jam that is at times hypnotic and far-reaching, and equally urgent and immersive.
I’m not saying that you need to be high to appreciate this EP. I’m just saying that listening to Interstate Bleach Party and Howdy Hoodee Slank in the right…mood ...can make you see the color Octarine.
Lightning at the Door and Effervescent cemented All Them Witches as true underground masters of Stoner Rock. 2015’s Dying Surfer Meets His Maker saw them broaden their musical scope and refine their sound. The album (yes, it is an album this time) leans heavily into the Blues with layers of grunge and psychedelia and celtic strings and even harmonicas. (Side note: the last time I heard harmonicas used in Stoner Rock was never. So good on them. I will say this: the hook brings you back.) All these influences were mixed in one big bowl and smoked out the top of a giant bong for full effect. It is at the same time a more technical and more mellow album. Stand out tracks on the album are the hard hitting Dirt Preachers and El Centro and This is Where it Falls Apart.
All Them Witches found themselves touring the small club circuit and then playing bigger and bigger stages. They got invited to festivals like Bonnaroo and were greeted by enthusiastic fans (and clouds of fragrant haze). There is nothing like performing live to hone a band’s edge. By the time Sleeping Through the War dropped in 2017, the boys had been together, touring and recording, for five years. The album is tightly crafted by a tight band. There are even guest vocalists to add texture and harmony to the songs. Less mellow than its predecessor, the album roars right from the opening track - Bulls - through to the closing track, Guess I’ll Go Live On The Internet. 3-5-7 is probably one of the best Stoner Rock tracks you will come across. And when you recognize the tonal mirroring of Am I Going Up with Alabaster, you feel smarter than you actually are. Lots of albums have made me bang my head; very few have made me stop and recognize the musical structure that underpins the melody. That is Tool-level composition right there. Long story short: this is an album put out by a band in its prime and it does not disappoint.
If you remember what happened in English class, what follows the apotheosis for the main character is the falling action or denouement. All Them Witches had peaked with Sleeping Through the War and had nowhere to go but down. The 2018 Lost and Found EP was four (comparatively) short covers and remixes that seemed more like leftovers than an actual meal. Sure, leftovers can be tasty, but All Them Witches fans were used to getting new and better breakfasts, luncheons and dinners and instead got last Tuesday’s reheated bean burrito. Which is fine, if you dig burritos, but it is still not as good as a nice, juicy steak.
Goddam, is anyone else craving a meal? Why is it so smoky in here, and why do I want to eat burritos and Doritos?
Hehe. Dorito. Burrito.
Fuck. I need to focus. Moving on.
Any fan of the band could tell that something was up, and that Lost and Found was at best a B-Side. It soon became evident that something really was up. Keyboardist (and part-time violinist) Allan Van Cleave was out of the band. This left a gigantic Ray Manzarek-esque hole in the band’s sound. The breakup was not a good one, and left some scars.
Van Cleave was replaced by Jonathan Draper, and the band released the album ATW in Sept of 2018. Sonically, the album is sound, but seems to lack the spark of greatness that was in everything prior to Lost and Found. The technical skills are there - Draper knows his way around a keyboard, and that is clearly evident on Fishbelly 86 Onions - but it kinda (IMHO) sounds more like an amazing All Them Witches cover album than an actual effort by the band. It is kinda like Bryan Cranston dressing up in a Walter White mask. It is super close to previous efforts but just not the same, somehow. 1st vs. 2nd is a jam and so is Diamond, and the album has an unrelenting energy, but it is just a bit off the mark.
The band must have felt something similar. Draper was turfed from the group just a month after ATW dropped. Instead of trying to recreate the four member sound that had anchored them since John Cusak and Amanda Peet’s landmark film, they decided to choose a new direction entirely.
When bands shuffle their lineup, it tends to be adding members (like our very own ancient monarchs) or replacing members. Very few bands successfully delete members. Well, OK, that band from Liverpool did successfully delete Stuart Sutcliffe from its lineup and they went on to do alright. Genesis made a successful transition from a 4-piece to a 3-piece when Peter Gabriel left. Oasis got 100% better when Liam Gallagher and his ego both quit. But losing an integral part of your sound - and the keyboards were central in so many songs - would be a tough transition. The band’s fanbase-not-so secretly worried that the lack of keyboardist would spell the end. Thankfully, we were wrong.
All Them Witches took that leap. Digging into their nomenclature and lore, they released a single as a three-piece band on Halloween of 2019. 1X1 is an angry, powerful Stoner Rock jam with a video that is an homage to Jesus Christ Pose. It is a Kyuss-meets-Tool-meets-Led Zeppelin-at-a-Black-Sabbath-concert song that made everyone simultaneously applaud and exhale.
They were back.
The new LP Nothing as the Ideal just dropped on September 4th, 2020. It is a leaner, meaner iteration of the band that seems to have lost no momentum. Everything resonates with power. Saturnine and Iron Jaw evokes Tony Iommi riffage. The Children of Coyote Women is a direct callback to the album Lightning at the Door. 41 is a thumping tune and Enemy of my Enemy is a relentless sonic attack. But most importantly, we get to see All Them Witches evolve as a band but hang on to the core of their sound.
You’re never going to hear this band on your local top 40 radio station. You might catch them on College radio, if the DJ is cool enough. Like most great music nowadays, you have to go looking to find it. But when you do find it, what an amazing experience it can be.
So now you have completed your Hero’s Journey (Twist! It turns out that YOU were the hero all along!) According to the trope, you are now older and wiser because you have ventured out of your comfortable little world.
Now prove me right, hero. Go listen and awaken your inner stoner. And bring me some goddamn Doritos. Cool Ranch for the win.
Links to QOTSA
Josh has included All Them Witches on The Alligator Hour and is known to be a fan of the band.
A recent review of Nothing as the Ideal stated that Charles Michael Parks Jr.’s voice was “Fantastic...like a bassier Josh Homme”.
More importantly, All Them Witches are a Stoner Rock band...and Josh literally invented the genre. It is clear that while the band has grown and evolved and are taking themselves to new places, their music has been inspired by that downtuned, low desert Kyuss groove.
Their Music
Until it Unwinds
Heavy/Like a Witch
The Urn
Extra Pleasant EP
The Marriage of Coyote Woman
Funeral for a Great Drunken Bird
When God Comes Back -- Live and badass
Effervescent
Interstate Bleach Party
Howdy Hoodee Slank
Dirt Preachers -- Live in 2016
El Centro
This is Where it Falls Apart
Bulls
3-5-7
Fishbelly 86 Onions
1st vs. 2nd
Diamond
Under Pressure -- yes, that song.
Open Passageways
Diamond
1X1
The Children of Coyote Woman
Enemy of my Enemy
Show Them Some Love
/AllThemWitches
Previous Posts
Tool
Alice in Chains
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard
Rage Against the Machine
Soundgarden
Run the Jewels
Royal Blood
Arctic Monkeys
Ty Segall
Eagles of Death Metal
Them Crooked Vultures
Led Zeppelin
Greta Van Fleet
Ten Commandos
Screaming Trees
Sound City Players
Iggy Pop
Mastodon
The Strokes
Radiohead
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2020.09.23 08:40 TheOGJammies FEMINIST PORN DOESN’T EXIST and RULE 34 is a LIE. FIGHT ME LibFems and Scrotes!!

We’ve taken a vocal Anti-Porn stance on this sub for which we’re often criticized by LibFems and Scrotes alike. Our detractors claim that porn can be feminist and that there’s porn out there that caters to women too.
So as an experiment, I actively looked around at recommended "feminist" porn sites to see if I had somehow misjudged.
I was hoping, somewhere in the teaming mass of female exploitation, there was some oasis of female catering porn so I could finally learn how porn is supposed to "enhance" my sex life, like all the Sex Pozzy Libfems keep claiming it’s going to but never has.
I started with a list from Glamour mag which detailed 15 porn sites I'm supposed to Enjoy:
15 Porn Sites for Women That You’ll Really, Really Enjoy
THE LIES. I looked through all these porn sites and I didn’t enjoy SHIT.
I honestly can’t tell the difference at all from regular ass porn and so-called “feminist” porn. How do I know it’s feminist? Some of the women don't wax as much?
There is one site that advertises that it's feminist because the women "choose" the porn actors they want to have sex with, but its behind an expensive pay wall. So .... if I want to see women who actually might be enjoying sex with someone they want to fuck, I gotta pay a premium? But they still want me to watch the rest of their free shit now that I know those women don’t really like the dudes they’re being paid to have sex with that much because otherwise they’d charge me to see it? 🤔
What’s especially wild is how they advertise the site with more naked women than men! Why are all the landing pages the same old T&A display and female objectification? This porn is supposed to be for straight women, right?? WHY am I looking at titties and vaginas STILL?!
Clearly the first part of the experiment was a complete failure, so I decided to search by my specific fantasies and see if I could find something that way. I settled on two scenarios to research:
Scene 1: All you can eat Buffet
Two brown skin dudes with goatees and washboard abs eating one pussy from the front to the back. Both straight - I don’t want to see any man on man sex. They can be any kind of medium Brown Skin as in Polynesian, Latino, Black, Italian, etc.
Scene 2: Suitor Fight Club
15 fine ass dudes in tight jeans and no shirt in a warehouse fight until only one is left standing to the amusement of one lucky woman who watches from a throne. She rides the one who wins like a prize horse and the others have to watch in shame and silence knowing they will have to try again next week. Some of them cry from frustration. And not fake tears. I want them to chest heave like an NBA player after a game 7 loss to a buzzer beater shot.
Surely, Rule 34 of the Internet should apply here right? If it exists, there should be porn of it!
WRONG. RULE 34 IS A LIE TOO!
First off, what is this kind of sex even called? It’s easy to find two women giving a man a blow job but two men and one woman? SUSPICIOUSLY LACKING IN INVENTORY.
Secondly, what do I even search to find the specific physical qualities I like in men?
Where is the MALE objectification? Why can't I search videos by peen size and shape organized into clickable categories for me?
What about racial categories? What about body type? Hair color? Facial hair preferences? Jawline? Is there some kind of conspiracy against straight women having physical preferences? Do they assume we don’t have any?
So trying to find my specific physical sexual preferences was a near impossible task to begin with, and then trying to narrow that down to a specific type of sex scene made it fully impossible.
So in conclusion, FEMINIST PORN DOES NOT EXIST and RULE 34 is a LIE.
At this point, I'm convinced labeling porn as feminist is a form of indoctrination: it’s like they are trying to make women accustomed and compatible to mainstream porn by tricking us into believing we’re being progressive by watching it.
But truthfully, It’s all irredeemable male pandering male gazey female exploiting unimaginative garbage and we’re missing literally NOTHING by not having it in our relationships.
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submitted by HaulA28Augl to u/HaulA28Augl [link] [comments]


2020.08.10 18:30 ZellZoy [Help]HP pavilion laptop intermittently crashes when going to sleep

So this has been happening pretty much since I got it. I am on Windows 10 Home and Windows Update says I am up to date as of today. Every once in a while, when my computer goes to sleep it crashes with a black screen. The power led stays on, and the harddrive and fans are spinning, but the screen is black, the keyboard and mouse will not respond, including the caps lock light and the backlight button (which I thought was OS independent...), and the battery drains as if the computer is in use. This happens whether I shut the lid or just leave the computer on long enough to fall asleep. The only way to get out of this is to hold the power button to shut it off and then turn it back on. I've searched through guides but the results I've found have either point to a windows update issue from a few years ago (I've updated since then) or to people who built desktops themselves and had hardware issues. With how thin the laptop is, I'd rather exhaust software avenues before cracking it open to check the ram.
I tried methods 1 and 2 in this guide: https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/windows/forum/all/windows-10-hibernatesleep-crash/ca87696f-2994-4a83-9502-e622ed045a73
which I thought solved it at first since it went a few days without happening after that, but it started happening again today. I've also tried messing with the sleep settings, disabling hybrid sleep (another guide mentioned it) but no dice. Here are logs from 20 minutes ago when it happened again.
2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS TI: --- Initializing Trusted Installer --- 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS TI: Last boot time: 2020-08-07 09:34:29.463 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Starting TrustedInstaller initialization. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsPublicSessionClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:4 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsPublicSessionClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:5 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: WinlogonNotifyLock, level: 8, total lock:6 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Ending TrustedInstaller initialization. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Starting the TrustedInstaller main loop. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS TrustedInstaller service starts successfully. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS No startup processing required, TrustedInstaller service was not set as autostart 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Startup processing thread terminated normally 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS TI: Startup Processing completes, release startup processing lock. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Starting TiWorker initialization. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: TiWorkerClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:2 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Ending TiWorker initialization. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Starting the TiWorker main loop. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS TiWorker starts successfully. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsWorker, level: 5, total lock:3 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Universal Time is: 2020-08-10 14:12:32.625 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Loaded Servicing Stack v10.0.18362.957 with Core: C:\WINDOWS\winsxs\amd64_microsoft-windows-servicingstack_31bf3856ad364e35_10.0.18362.957_none_5f2e9e6258ea82f2\cbscore.dll 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Build: 18362.1.amd64fre.19h1_release.190318-1202 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CSI [email protected]/8/10:14:12:32.627 WcpInitialize: wcp.dll version 10.0.18362.957 (WinBuild.160101.0800) 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsSessionManager, level: 11, total lock:8 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CSIInventoryCriticalSection, level: 64, total lock:9 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS NonStart: Set pending store consistency check. 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Maint: idle processing paused 2020-08-10 07:12:32, Info CBS Session: 30830368_1242688321 initialized by client LanguageSettings, external staging directory: (null), external registry directory: (null) 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Appl:Feature On Demand package without explicit comparator, using GE on build version 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Appl:Feature On Demand package without explicit comparator, using GE on build version 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Appl:LCU package and revision compare set to explicit 2020-08-10 07:12:33, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:12:36, Info CBS Maint: idle processing paused 2020-08-10 07:12:36, Info CBS Session: 30830368_1286250777 initialized by client DISM Package Manager Provider, external staging directory: (null), external registry directory: (null) 2020-08-10 07:12:37, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-OneCore-ApplicationModel-Sync-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:37, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-OneCore-ApplicationModel-Sync-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.836] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:37, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-OneCore-ApplicationModel-Sync-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.959] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:41, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Client-LanguagePack-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~en-US~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [Language Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:43, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Client-LanguagePack-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~en-US~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [Language Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:44, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Client-LanguagePack-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~en-US~10.0.18362.959] since it has a release-type [Language Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:49, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-CoreEdition~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [Product] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:50, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-CoreEdition~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.959] since it has a release-type [Product] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:50, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-FodMetadata-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:12:50, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Hello-Face-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:50, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Hello-Face-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.628] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:50, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Holographic-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Holographic-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Holographic-Desktop-FOD-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.959] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-InternetExplorer-Optional-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~11.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-LanguageFeatures-Basic-en-us-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-LanguageFeatures-Handwriting-en-us-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-LanguageFeatures-OCR-en-us-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:51, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-LanguageFeatures-Speech-en-us-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:52, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-LanguageFeatures-TextToSpeech-en-us-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:52, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-MediaPlayer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:52, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-MediaPlayer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:52, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-NetFx3-OnDemand-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:57, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-ProfessionalEdition~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [Product] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:58, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-ProfessionalEdition~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.959] since it has a release-type [Product] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:58, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-QuickAssist-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-TabletPCMath-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-TabletPCMath-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Xps-Xps-Viewer-Opt-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [Microsoft-Windows-Xps-Xps-Viewer-Opt-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [OpenSSH-Client-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Skipping package [OpenSSH-Client-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900] since it has a release-type [OnDemand Pack] that makes it not superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_DotNetRollup~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.3178, ApplicableState: 80, CurrentState:80 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS [Package_for_DotNetRollup~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.3178] is a top-level package and is deeply superseded 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_DotNetRollup~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.4190.4, ApplicableState: 80, CurrentState:80 2020-08-10 07:12:59, Info CBS [Package_for_DotNetRollup~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.4190.4] is a top-level package and is deeply superseded 2020-08-10 07:13:00, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_DotNetRollup~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.4200.2, ApplicableState: 112, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:00, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:13:00, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_KB4497165~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.4.1, ApplicableState: 112, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:00, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4515383~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.350.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4515530~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.323.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_KB4516115~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.0, ApplicableState: 80, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS [Package_for_KB4516115~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.0] is a top-level package and is deeply superseded 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4520390~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.387.1.2] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4521863~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.411.1.3] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:01, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4524569~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.471.1.1] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:02, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4528759~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.590.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:02, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_KB4537759~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.0, ApplicableState: 80, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:02, Info CBS [Package_for_KB4537759~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.0] is a top-level package and is deeply superseded 2020-08-10 07:13:02, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4538674~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.651.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:02, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4541338~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.710.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4552152~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.772.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4559309~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.0] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4560959~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.892.1.3] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_KB4561600~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.1.1, ApplicableState: 112, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Skipping package [Package_for_KB4565554~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.957.1.3] since it is permanent 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:13:03, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_OasisAsset~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.206.1.3, ApplicableState: 112, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:05, Info CBS Appl:LCU package and revision compare set to explicit 2020-08-10 07:13:05, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:13:07, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_RollupFix~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.900.1.8, ApplicableState: 80, CurrentState:80 2020-08-10 07:13:07, Info CBS [Package_for_RollupFix~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.900.1.8] is a top-level package and is deeply superseded 2020-08-10 07:13:09, Info CBS Appl:LCU package and revision compare set to explicit 2020-08-10 07:13:09, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:13:10, Info CBS Read out cached package applicability for package: Package_for_RollupFix~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~18362.959.1.9, ApplicableState: 112, CurrentState:112 2020-08-10 07:13:10, Info CBS Appl:LCU package and revision compare set to explicit 2020-08-10 07:13:10, Info CBS Package Format: PSFX 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Trusted Installer is shutting down because: SHUTDOWN_REASON_AUTOSTOP 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Maint: idle processing paused 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS TiWorker signaled for shutdown, going to exit. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ExecutionEngineFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Execution Engine Finalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Execution Engine Finalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: TiWorkerClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:3 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CCbsWorker, level: 5, total lock:2 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Ending the TiWorker main loop. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Starting TiWorker finalization. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ExecutionEngineFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CBS Engine already deactivated 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CBS Engine already deactivated 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ComponentAnalyzerFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: PackageTrackerFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CoreResourcesUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: SessionManagerFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CSIInventoryCriticalSection, level: 64, total lock:9 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CCbsSessionManager, level: 11, total lock:8 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CapabilityManagerFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: PublicObjectMonitorFinalize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: Enter vCoreInitializeLock 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: WcpUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: DrupUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CfgMgr32Unload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: DpxUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: SrUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsEsdUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsTraceInfoUninitialize 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsEventUnregister 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: AppContainerUnload 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: WdsUnload, logging from cbscore will end. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Ending TiWorker finalization. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Ending the TrustedInstaller main loop. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Starting TrustedInstaller finalization. 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: WinlogonNotifyLock, level: 8, total lock:6 2020-08-10 07:15:16, Info CBS Ending TrustedInstaller finalization. 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS TI: --- Initializing Trusted Installer --- 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS TI: Last boot time: 2020-08-10 09:07:05.500 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Starting TrustedInstaller initialization. 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsPublicSessionClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:4 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsPublicSessionClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:5 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: WinlogonNotifyLock, level: 8, total lock:6 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Ending TrustedInstaller initialization. 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Starting the TrustedInstaller main loop. 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS TrustedInstaller service starts successfully. 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS No startup processing required, TrustedInstaller service was not set as autostart 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS Startup processing thread terminated normally 2020-08-10 09:11:32, Info CBS TI: Startup Processing completes, release startup processing lock. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Starting TiWorker initialization. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: TiWorkerClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:2 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Ending TiWorker initialization. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Starting the TiWorker main loop. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS TiWorker starts successfully. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsWorker, level: 5, total lock:3 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Universal Time is: 2020-08-10 16:11:34.636 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Loaded Servicing Stack v10.0.18362.957 with Core: C:\WINDOWS\winsxs\amd64_microsoft-windows-servicingstack_31bf3856ad364e35_10.0.18362.957_none_5f2e9e6258ea82f2\cbscore.dll 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Build: 18362.1.amd64fre.19h1_release.190318-1202 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CSI [email protected]/8/10:16:11:34.638 WcpInitialize: wcp.dll version 10.0.18362.957 (WinBuild.160101.0800) 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CCbsSessionManager, level: 11, total lock:8 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Lock: New lock added: CSIInventoryCriticalSection, level: 64, total lock:9 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS NonStart: Set pending store consistency check. 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Maint: idle processing paused 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Session: 30830384_3943307287 initialized by client WinMgmt, external staging directory: (null), external registry directory: (null) 2020-08-10 09:11:34, Info CBS Enumerating Foundation package: Microsoft-Windows-Foundation-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.900, this could be slow 2020-08-10 09:11:36, Info CBS Appl:Feature On Demand package without explicit comparator, using GE on build version 2020-08-10 09:11:36, Info CBS Appl:Feature On Demand package without explicit comparator, using GE on build version 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CSI 00000002 IAdvancedInstallerAwareStore_ResolvePendingTransactions (call 1) (flags = 00000004, progress = NULL, phase = 0, pdwDisposition = @0x46f587d3b0 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CSI 00000003 Poqexec successfully registered in [l:12 ml:13]'SetupExecute' 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CSI 00000004 CSI Store 1521732342704 initialized 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CSI [email protected]/8/10:16:11:39.710 CSI Transaction @0x1624e50e1b0 initialized for deployment engine {d16d444c-56d8-11d5-882d-0080c847b195} with flags 00000000 and client id 'TI5.30830384_3943307287:1/' 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CSI [email protected]/8/10:16:11:39.723 CSI Transaction @0x1624e50e1b0 destroyed 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-NetFx4-WCF-US-OC-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1, Remote Parent: NetFx4-AdvSrvs, Intended State: Installed 2020-08-10 09:11:39, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-NetFx4-WCF-US-OC-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.1, Update: WCF-Services45, Applicable: Applicable, Disposition: Installed 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServerRole, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-WebServer, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServer, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-CommonHttpFeatures, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServer, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-ApplicationDevelopment, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServer, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-HealthAndDiagnostics, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServer, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-Security, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServer, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-Performance, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServerRole, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-WebServerManagementTools, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Local Parent: IIS-WebServerManagementTools, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-IIS6ManagementCompatibility, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: DetectUpdate, Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-AddOn-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Remote Parent: IIS-WebServerRole, Intended State: Staged 2020-08-10 09:11:40, Info CBS Appl: Package: Microsoft-Windows-IIS-WebServer-AddOn-Package~31bf3856ad364e35~amd64~~10.0.18362.815, Update: IIS-FTPServer, Applicable: NeedsParent, Disposition: Staged 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS Trusted Installer is shutting down because: SHUTDOWN_REASON_AUTOSTOP 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS Maint: idle processing paused 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS TiWorker signaled for shutdown, going to exit. 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ExecutionEngineFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS Execution Engine Finalize 2020-08-10 09:13:40, Info CBS Execution Engine Finalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: TiWorkerClassFactory, level: 30, total lock:3 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CCbsWorker, level: 5, total lock:2 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Ending the TiWorker main loop. 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Starting TiWorker finalization. 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ExecutionEngineFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CBS Engine already deactivated 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CBS Engine already deactivated 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: ComponentAnalyzerFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: PackageTrackerFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CoreResourcesUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: SessionManagerFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CSIInventoryCriticalSection, level: 64, total lock:9 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: CCbsSessionManager, level: 11, total lock:8 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CapabilityManagerFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: PublicObjectMonitorFinalize 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: Enter vCoreInitializeLock 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: WcpUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:41, Info CSI 00000007 Direct SIL provider: Number of files opened: 15. 2020-08-10 09:13:43, Info CBS Ending the TrustedInstaller main loop. 2020-08-10 09:13:43, Info CBS Starting TrustedInstaller finalization. 2020-08-10 09:13:43, Info CBS Lock: Lock removed: WinlogonNotifyLock, level: 8, total lock:6 2020-08-10 09:13:43, Info CBS Ending TrustedInstaller finalization. 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: DrupUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CfgMgr32Unload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: DpxUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: SrUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsEsdUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsTraceInfoUninitialize 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: CbsEventUnregister 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: AppContainerUnload 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS CbsCoreFinalize: WdsUnload, logging from cbscore will end. 2020-08-10 09:13:45, Info CBS Ending TiWorker finalization. 
I tried Windows Memory Diagnostic and it seemed to get to the end without errors, however the Event Viewer does not contain an event for the results (it does have the entry for when I started the scan but no results).
submitted by ZellZoy to techsupport [link] [comments]


2020.08.06 06:08 denesfernando Sou Babaca Por Querer Que O Namorado Da Minha Amiga Não Passe Mais A Quarentena Aqui E Volte Pra Casa Dele?

Olá Luba, editores, gatas e Turma. Essa história que vou compartilhar aqui é recente, ainda estou tratando em terapia, mas ela começa um pouquinho lá atrás.
Um ""pouco"" de background para situar a todos de onde tudo isso começou.
Em 2013 comecei namorar um cara que vou chamar de Karen, por ele ser muito, mas muito CUSÃO (inclusive, ele se parece muito com você Luba e por vocês serem tão idênticos, eu passei um bom tempo sem assistir o canal, pois não conseguia te ver sem lembrar dele). Mas, enfim, em 2015 ele e o grupo da faculdade dele decidiram morar todos juntos em uma casa perto da faculdade, pois estava exaustivo para todos trabalharem em pontos distintos da cidade (São Paulo, para se alguém quiser se situar).
Então, em janeiro de 2016, eles se mudaram e eu ia para lá aos fins de semana, até que acabei me mudando para a casa em Junho do mesmo ano, no dia do meu aniversário.
Pois bem, foi uma fase horrível da minha vida por causa do meu ex, terminamos em maio de 2017 e tive que sair da casa. Esse meu ex era um abusador, um aproveitador, a pior pessoa que eu poderia ter conhecido na minha vida. Os abusos psicológicos que ele cometeu comigo, afetaram totalmente minha confiança e em como eu viria a me relacionar com outros caras, fora as crises de ansiedade que eu arrasto até hoje.
Mas então, eu fiquei amigo dos amigos dele da faculdade e em especial da Karls que virou minha melhor amiga.
Em 2017 eles terminaram a faculdade e em 2018 o contrato da casa venceu e eles finalmente poderiam se mudar, áquela altura ninguém suportava mais olhar pra cara do Karen.
Então, foi nesse momento, que a Karls e o Akarls me chamaram para vir morar com eles numa nova casa. Sem o Karen. E hoje nós três vivemos como uma família feliz com os nossos pets.
2019
Eu conheci um cara, eu vou chamar ele de Lars.
Lars e eu começamos a trocar mensagens, se conhecer, nos aproximarmos. Até então, antes dele, todos os outros caras que eu acabei ficando, não davam certo, (tem muito gay problemático nessa cidade). Mas Lars foi diferente, conforme nos conhecíamos, ele ia transpondo todas as muralhas que eu usava como defesa, pois meu maior medo seria voltar para um relacionamento abusivo, tóxico e doentio.
Com o Lars eu fui bem devagar, realmente queria conhecer ele, pra ver se o que eu estava sentindo era o certo e se ele não iria me fazer mal.
Nesse tempo conhecendo ele, eu desabafava com Karls todas as minhas inseguranças, pois ela tinha vivido todo o meu drama com o meu ex, ela sabia dos meus medos, receios, inseguranças em me relacionar com alguém e ela me dava todo o apoio, pra poder voltar a acreditar e saber que nem todo mundo é igual o Karen, que na verdade eu dei azar com o Karen, mas que não seria assim de novo.
Depois de tantos embates sobre minhas agruras eu acabei me desarmando e me permiti começar algo com o Lars.
Um mês e meio depois, finalmente decidi trazer ele em casa, para conhecer meus amigos e 😏.
Então, foi nesse fim de semana de novembro de 2019 que coisas aconteceram.
Depois de ficarmos, acabei aceitando os meus sentimentos por ele, pensei que depois de tanto tempo solteiro, passando por aventuras fracassadas com pessoas que não se encaixavam, onde a química só proporcionava uma reação inicial. Ali estava talvez o momento de poder compartilhar momentos com alguém.
Mas aquele início de sonho desmoronou muito rápido. No domingo quando ele estava pra sair para trabalhar, Lars me contou que iria para o Beto Carrero com um amigo. Fui pego de surpresa, pois ele não havia mencionado nada nas nossas conversas durante a semana.
Na época, Lars trabalhava como bartender numa cafeteria e reclamava de trabalhar muito, não ter finais de semana livres e só folgar nas segundas-feiras.
Como não tínhamos oficializado nada, nossa primeira vez foi na noite anterior e o fato de estar disposto a querer começar a construir uma relação tinha sido algo que eu havia arrazoado no meu coração, achei absurdo demais eu questionar porque ele não tinha me falado nada antes.
Tudo bem, ele iria no Beto Carrero com um amigo, logo após sair da cafeteria. Pegaria o ônibus na estação do Tietê no domingo a noite, passaria o dia no parque, já que a folga seria na segunda, e na segunda a noite ele voltaria e iria trabalhar na terça-feira de manhã. Eu, pelo menos, imaginei que seria assim.
Na segunda-feira, eu fui trabalhar normal, vi as fotos dele no Beto Carrero, os stories no Instagram aparentemente nada de estranho, mas a primeira coisa que me chamou a atenção foi o fato dele não ter postado um único story com o amigo, mas até aí, se eu encucasse com isso, seria uma atitude tóxica e eu não queria isso. Numa relação deve existir confiança.
Nós não nos falamos o dia inteiro, pois eu não iria ficar o importunando num passeio como aquele, que ele aproveitasse o máximo possível. Foi quando às 18:00 eu resolvi mandar uma mensagem para ele, já que eu estava saindo do trabalho.
A mensagem era mandando um "oi" e desejando que ele tivesse se divertido bastante e fizesse uma viagem tranquila de volta.
Foi quando ele me respondeu que não voltaria aquela noite, que ele iria para Balneário Camboriú com o amigo passear de barco. Eu fiquei completamente sem reação, foi um choque. Ele só reclamava de como o trabalho explorava ele, não era flexível e do nada, de uma viagem totalmente espontânea que aconteceu aleatoriamente pra aproveitar um dia de folga num bate e volta, surgiu uma folga no dia seguinte.
Eu não tive como não ser arrastado de volta para os tempos do Karen, onde eu fui trouxa por anos, onde ele matava aula pra transar na escada da faculdade, dizia que ficava até mais tarde no serviço pra não pegar trânsito, mas na verdade ia para dates furtivos de apps de pegação (inclusive tenho uma história ótima com relação a isso da época do Karen), enfim, meu cérebro e meu coração ligaram o sinal vermelho, as sirenes começaram a zunir no meu ouvido, a última coisa que eu queria era ser enganado como fui na minha última relação.
Voltando, Lars não falou mais nada depois disso, fui pra casa naquele dia. Na terça-feira de manhã, outro sinal de alerta, não tinha nenhuma mensagem no celular. Isso poderia ser irrelevante, se a gente não tivesse passado o último mês e meio, trocando várias mensagens e memes da hora que acordava até a hora de dormir. Me senti mal, a conversa tinha morrido da noite para o dia, fiquei angustiado, pois eu estava começando a gostar dele e aquilo mudou da noite para o dia.
Terça-feira se foi, ele em Balneário Camboriú, fotos e stories no Instagram se seguiram e nada desse amigo misterioso.
Finalmente, a noite ele estava voltando e mandou uma mensagem dizendo que estava exausto, mas estava voltando. Nesse momento, minha mente já tinha formulado mil e uma histórias, mas resolvi ser prudente, apesar da angustia que estava sentindo.
Foi difícil dormir aquela noite, na manhã seguinte, ele mandou uma mensagem dizendo que havia chegado, estava exausto, mas estava indo trabalhar.
Nossa conversa, já não era a mesma, algo tinha mudado, as palavras ou a ausência delas são um termômetro para o coração, escrever para outra pessoa é um ato de conexão e o nosso elo havia se rompido.
Foi quando resolvi confrontá-lo.
Segue abaixo a conversa no whatsapp:
[28/11 11:56] Denes: Desculpa, Lars.
[28/11 11:56] Denes: Eu não sei de fato o que aconteceu
[28/11 11:56] Lars: Pelo o que ?
[28/11 11:56] Denes: mas desde terça que eu sinto que nossa conversa morreu
[28/11 11:56] Lars: :(
[28/11 11:56] Lars: Eu que peço desculpas
[28/11 11:57] Denes: se vc puder me dar uma luz
[28/11 11:57] Lars: Questão de conversa tbm não sei ... :(
[28/11 11:58] Lars: Não quero ser cuzao contigo
[28/11 11:58] Denes: me diz o que tá acontecendo
[28/11 11:59] Lars: Gosto olhando no olho
[28/11 11:59] Lars: Gosto de vc
[28/11 11:59] Denes: talvez não haja olho no olho se eu não entender o que está acontecendo
[28/11 12:00] Denes: eu tb descobri que estou gostando de vc
[28/11 12:00] Denes: descobri de uma maneira bem ruim
[28/11 12:00] Denes: só quero que vc me diga
[28/11 12:00] Denes: sem medo
[28/11 12:02] Lars: Eu recebi uma ligação de alguém antes de viajar que me deixou balanceado
[28/11 12:02] Denes: prossiga
[28/11 12:02] Lars: Não gosto da ideia por aqui
[28/11 12:03] Lars: Mas tá bom ...
[28/11 12:03] Denes: por favor, agora que começou, não pare
[28/11 12:03] Lars: Pouco antes de conhecer vc eu tinha acabado um relacionamento ...
[28/11 12:03] Denes: hum
[28/11 12:04] Lars: E tipo ainda algo que me deixa balançado e tal ...
[28/11 12:05] Denes: entendi
[28/11 12:05] Denes: ah...
[28/11 12:05] Lars: E tipo não quero mentir pra vc
[28/11 12:05] Lars: Nem ser um cuzao contigo me entende
[28/11 12:05] Lars: Quero ser sincero sempre
[28/11 12:05] Lars: Não só com vc mas comigo mesmo
[28/11 12:06] Denes: então, o livro de Harry Potter que está com vc, foi um presente de um amigo meu que faleceu esse ano, será que posso pegar com vc na catraca amanhã da Santos Imigrantes
[28/11 12:06] Lars: Sim ... Claro ... Mas queria conversar mais com vc pessoalmente
[28/11 12:06] Lars: Se não se importar
[28/11 12:07] Lars: Tenho um presente pra vc
[28/11 12:07] Denes: eu vou me importar
[28/11 12:07] Denes: por favor, sem presentes
[28/11 12:07] Lars: Tudo bem :(
[28/11 12:09] Denes: amanhã as 8:30 te encontro na Catraca
[28/11 12:09] Lars: :( eu lhe entendo sabe ... Mas confesso que gosto de vc e queria que vc permanecesse na minha vida independente de qualquer coisa
[28/11 12:09] Denes: não será possível
[28/11 12:09] Lars: Tudo bem eu entendo vc ... :(
[28/11 12:09] Lars: Me desculpa
[28/11 12:10] Denes: te encontro amanhã na catraca sem falta
[28/11 12:21] Lars: Hj vc sai que horas do trabalho?
[28/11 12:24] Denes: Desculpa, Lars. Mas eu só pretendo te encontrar para pegar o meu livro. Não, temos nada para conversar. Você não me deve satisfações, justificativas ou esclarecimentos. Apenas o meu respeito. Mas, mesmo assim. Esse ponto final precisa ser colocado.
[28/11 12:25] Lars: Tudo bem eu entendo e respeito vc ... Falei de hj pq posso te entregar hj o livro
[28/11 12:25] Lars: Ele está comigo aqui no trabalho
[28/11 12:26] Denes: Eu saio às 18:00
[28/11 12:26] Lars: Posso te entregar hj o mesmo horário ... Na estação melhor pra vc
[28/11 12:27] Denes: Que horas na Santos Imigrantes vc vai passar por lá?
[28/11 12:27] Lars: Umas 19h a 19:30
[28/11 12:28] Lars: Mas espero a sua hora
[28/11 12:28] Denes: Okay, as 19:00 estarei lá
[28/11 12:28] Denes: Se chegar antes estarei sentado em algum dos bancos da plataforma
[28/11 12:29] Lars: Tá bom
[28/11 12:29] Lars: Sei o que vc vai falar ... Mas desculpas :(
Quando ele falou dessa ligação do ex e ficou balançado, eu senti uma enxurrada de sentimentos negativos, o tsunami de chorume que eram as mentiras do Karen voltando a tona. Todas as desculpas esfarrapadas, parecia que eu estava vivendo tudo outra vez.
Eu estava cego, na gana de não querer cometer os mesmos erros do passado, acabei sendo seco, duro e intolerante, condenando um pelos erros de outro.
Eu já tinha sentenciado dentro de mim que aquela viagem foi algo que ele tinha programado com o ex e que tinha ido com ele e que eles tinham se acertado e que ele queria me manter como step se nada desse certo. Enfim…
Nesse mesmo dia, fui buscar o meu livro (um fato curioso, esse livro que foi presente de um amigo que veio a falecer em 2019, foi um presente pra me lembrar o quanto eu sou uma pessoa corajosa, era a edição de 20 anos da Pedra Filosofal nas cores da Grifinória e dentro ele escreveu a famosa frase da Luna "As coisas que perdemos sempre acabam voltando para nós. Mas nem sempre na forma em que pensamos." https://imgur.com/a/ebJFd2U
Ironicamente, quando paro pra olhar isso em particular, penso na grande ironia de tudo.
Eu cheguei antes na estação, fiquei esperando, sentado num banco na plataforma, vendo vários trens passando, várias pessoas descendo na estação vindo depois de mais um dia de trabalho. A minha ansiedade estava a mil, eu queria chorar, estava angustiado com tudo aquilo, pior, sem entender como "tinha cometido" o mesmo erro outra vez.
Ele chegou uns 15 minutos depois, estava com o livro na mão, eu peguei o livro e então ele me estendeu os braços pedindo um abraço, fiz com ele o que eu devia ter feito com o Karen, olhei para ele com a minha pior cara de desgosto e nojo e falei "Adeus", virei as costas e deixei ele lá.
Hoje, não me orgulho do que eu fiz, sinto vergonha quando penso, mas para que vocês entendam aquele gesto, mesmo ele não sabendo, era algo traumatizante, no término com o Karen, quando coloquei minhas malas e meus livros no táxi, ele chegou até mim e na maior cara de pau, na sua maior interpretação pra burguês ver, ele me pediu um abraço e o trouxa aqui cedeu esse abraço, então ele sussurrou no meu ouvido "Sou eternamente grato por tudo o que a gente viveu e você vai sempre poder contar comigo para o que você precisar" e quando eu precisei o que eu ouvi? "Não tenho obrigação nenhuma de te ajudar."
Quando eu saí da estação, bloqueei o Lars em todas as redes sociais, Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp e até o número dele pra ele não me mandar SMS ou ligar. Não queria nunca mais ouvir falar dele pelo resto da minha vida.
Alguns dias se passaram e a Karls me contou que Lars havia mandado mensagem para ela no Instagram dizendo que estava preocupado comigo, queria falar comigo e eu irredutível falei que nunca mais queria saber nada a respeito dele.
Então ali eu tinha colocado uma pedra em cima desse assunto, vida que segue.
Dezembro de 2019
Karls é uma garota muito linda, mas em todos esses anos de amizade ela só se envolvia com os piores caras do Tinder, uma fase da vida dela que fazemos piada, mas que se você olhar atentamente, era bem triste.
Ela tinha o sonho de conhecer um cara bacana, compartilhar momentos, viver toda aquela fantasia de namoro, dormir abraçada, assistir anime, cantar músicas da Disney e cozinhar todos os pratos possíveis de todos os programas de culinária que existem no mundo.
Depois de anos, esse cara apareceu. Vamos chamá-lo de Darls.
Darls é um cara super carismático, que faz amizade por onde ele passa, falador, contador de piada, solicito, uma pessoa que todo mundo iria adorar ter como amigo.
JANEIRO 2020
Parecia que Darls sempre esteve nas nossas vidas, Akarls e eu o recebemos de braços abertos, pois víamos o quanto ele fazia Karls feliz.
Logo ele começou me pedir dicas e mais dicas de coisas que fariam a Karls feliz e nesses 5 anos de amizade eu era a pessoa que mais sabia de tudo o que a Karls gostava.
FEVEREIRO 2020
Eles oficializaram o namoro, (meio rápido, mas…), então ela entrou numa tour para conhecer todas os amigos dele, pois ele queria apresentar a namorada para as pessoas importantes na vida dele.
Darls mora a 35km de distância, num bairro distante, 2 horas de viagem no mínimo, mas ele sempre estava vindo passar mais tempo aqui.
MARÇO 2020
Pandemia chegou, isolamento social foi instaurado, pessoas em casa. Eu sou editor de vídeo, então estou trabalhando em casa desde que esse inferno começou. E quem acabou vindo para cá, também? Exatamente, Darls.
A companhia dele era agradável, e por vermos Karls feliz, nada objetamos, aceitamos naturalmente a estadia dele aqui. Mesmo que nunca tenhamos conversado isso entre nós, foi natural olharmos para a felicidade dela.
ABRIL 2020
Um mês de quarentena, eu sou uma pessoa ansiosa. Solteiro que passou da barreira dos 30, já havia sentenciado que não conheceria ninguém e morreria só, pois já estava sem esperança de conhecer alguém em um mundo sem um vírus mortal, imagina em um mundo onde estar perto 2 metros de alguém pode ser sua sentença de morte.
Eu comecei entrar numa crise terrível, comecei trabalhar demais, a fazer 12 horas de trabalho por dia e no meu tempo vago eu comecei a assistir todos os filmes e curtas gays já foram produzidos no mundo. E nisso, fiz a burrada de assistir um filme que superestimei por anos.
Brokeback Mountain.
'O que eu fiz da minha vida?'
Eu fiquei tão mal, mas tão mal, que naquela noite eu fui dormir chorando e os dias que se seguiram eu tive tanto remorso pelo final daquele filme, que certo dia eu comecei chorar na frente da Karls e do Darls enquanto a gente almoçava.
No final de abril, meu tio implorou que eu fosse na casa dele, pois estava tendo um problema entre minha mãe e minha irmã e ele estava preocupado da minha mãe acabar se metendo em um avião e vindo pra São Paulo no meio de uma pandemia. Fui, como se eu já não estivesse colapsando, ainda tinha que resolver o problema de outras pessoas.
Naquela semana, eu assisti um vídeo, tenho 80% de certeza que foi no LubaTV os outros 20% acho que foi no canal do Henry Bugalho, que falava sobre perdão, algo do tipo "se não perdoamos, do que adianta pedirmos desculpas" e eu já estava muito reflexivo.
De noite, eu estava no apartamento do meu tio, quando recebi uma notificação de que alguém tinha me seguido no Twitter.
Abri a notificação e vi que era o Lars me seguindo quase 6 meses depois. Ele não tinha twitter e tinha criado uma conta por causa da quarentena.
Minha primeira reação foi bloquear ele, mas aí bateu aquele turbilhão de coisas acumuladas nessa quarentena. O final de Brokeback Mountain, a fala sobre perdão e um detalhe sobre o Lars que pesou muito, ele tem diabetes, acho que é um tipo raro, ele desenvolveu super novo, ele toma dois tipos de insulina, ele é grupo do risco.
Sentei no sofá e me perguntei, 'o que ele queria depois de todos esses meses? Ele não entendeu o meu "Adeus"?'
Pois, bem. Fui até o Instagram, desbloqueei ele e mandei a seguinte mensagem:
"O que você quer?"
Ele levou uma meia hora pra me responder, o 'digitando…' parecia eterno.
Resumindo, ele falou que se importava muito comigo, que eu marquei a vida dele, que nunca quis se distanciar de mim, que jamais foi a intenção me magoar com o que quer que tenha acontecido e que nunca dei a oportunidade dele se explicar.
E eu respondi, que não importava o que ele tivesse para me dizer, não ia mudar a opinião que eu tinha sobre ele.
Ledo engano, meus caros.
Fui dormir às 4 da manhã, tirei tudo de dentro de mim, tudo o que eu inventei na minha cabeça. Porque no meu relacionamento anterior eu ouvi tantas mentiras, que acabei jurando que qualquer um iria mentir para mim, era o único referencial que eu tinha.
Só para que vocês saibam, era realmente um amigo, as fotos que ele tirou junto com o amigo no Beto Carrero, foram todas no celular do amigo a folga da Terça-feira, o chefe dele estava devendo uma folga para ele e como ele não iria poder tirar essa folga a mais do que as que estavam previstas para Dezembro, o chefe deu a folga pra ele na terça para que ele aproveitasse mais um dia de viagem. E sim, o ex dele ligou, ele ficou balançado, pois eles tinham tido uma história recém terminada, mas ele me contou, primeiro porque eu insisti, mas também porque ele não queria mentir pra mim, já que eu tinha todo esse problema com mentiras, então ele queria ser honesto comigo desde o início e que nunca foi a intenção dele voltar com o ex, tanto que ele não voltou, ele queria estar comigo, e que mesmo tendo passado todo aquele tempo ele nunca tinha me esquecido e não tinha desistido de mim.
Eu falei para ele que não sabia como reagir a tudo aquilo, disse que não sabia se seria capaz de confiar nele. E que ele não tivesse esperança, mas que eu iria refletir sobre tudo aquilo.
Então eu voltei pra casa e compartilhei a história com Karls e Darls.
Karls ficou meio com o pé atrás, mas Darls me apontou os erros que eu cometi, me fez enxergar o quanto eu tinha exagerado pelo medo e desconfiança que eu tinha, que não tinha nada a ver com Lars e minha ficha caiu.
Agora, tudo o que me restava era o meu orgulho, eu precisava passar por cima disso.
Voltei a conversar com Lars, aos poucos, foi difícil no início, mas ele foi muito tolerante, eu expliquei que não estava sendo fácil voltar a conversar com ele, mas que compreendi que muito daquela situação era culpa minha.
Ele começou a me mandar mensagens de manhã e a noite, de bom dia e boa noite e esporadicamente algum meme. Foram duas semanas conversando quando houve a necessidade da gente se ver. Eu não sabia como iria reagir.
Sim, ele viria aqui em casa no meio de uma quarentena, mas antes que cresça os julgamentos, moramos próximo um do outro, ele viria a pé, sem pegar nenhuma condução e num horário de pouco fluxo.
MAIO 2020
Então comuniquei que ele viria aqui em casa para Karls, Akarls e Darls. Aparentemente, achei que todos tinham recebido a notícia de bom grado.
Ele veio, a primeira coisa que ele fez foi ir para o banheiro tomar banho, com Covid não se brinca. Depois, sentamos e conversamos, e mais uma vez, eu falei tudo de novo, dessa vez olhando no olho, colocando tudo a limpo, uma conversa franca, contei de todas as impressões que eu tive de tudo o que aconteceu, como a narrativa se construiu na minha cabeça e porque agi da maneira que agi.
Em contra partida, ele disse que estava tudo bem, disse que ficou muito chateado, mas os amigos dele conversaram com ele dizendo que tinha um motivo para eu agir como eu tinha agido. Ele me falou que nunca me esqueceu e queria ter uma oportunidade de conversar comigo e esclarecer as coisas, pois sabia que tudo tinha sido um grande mal entendido. Ele falou que mandou várias mensagens para a Karls, mas não obteve resposta. E quando ele me mandou o convite no Twitter, ele disse que seria a sua última tentativa de se aproximar de mim, se não desse certo, ele mesmo desistiria de tudo.
Ele passou três dias aqui em casa, eu não me abri tanto com ele com relação a isso, mas eu senti muito remorso por como as coisas aconteceram por minha causa.
Outra coisa, lembra na mensagem, quando ele falou que tinha um presente para me dar e eu falei que não queria? Ele trouxe o presente, ele guardou o presente todo esse tempo e disse que toda vez que via o presente, ele lembrava de tudo o que a gente viveu e a coisa que ele mais queria era me dar esse presente, que ironicamente ele comprou na viagem para o Beto Carrero.
Era um funko do Harry Potter, já que eu amo muito Harry Potter. (Não, não sou transfóbico, eu amo Harry Potter desde 2000). http://imgur.com/gallery/cah0Ry7
Ele voltou pra casa dele. Continuamos a nos falar, reatar laços, ter essa troca.
Compartilhei minhas impressões com Karls e Darls, eu estava relutante, desacreditado. As pessoas subestimam relacionamentos abusivos, mas a gente carrega coisas por anos, os estragos são terríveis, estava eu provavelmente estragando uma oportunidade de ser feliz por medo de ser feliz.
As coisas foram devagar, estávamos conversando de nossas rotinas na quarentena, ele o quanto sentia falta do trabalho e não aguentava mais assistir séries e eu o quanto estava trabalhando e engordando, já que editor de vídeo trabalha em casa, praticamos isolamento social antes disso "estar na moda" (✌️ salve editores do canal, eu juro que tô escrevendo essa história que já passa de 4 mil palavras, pensando se realmente o Luba lerá essa história na Turma-Feira, fico imaginando no trabalhão que vocês vão ter pra editar, se eu puder pedir, posta a Timeline pra eu ver como ficou no final, curto muito timelines [Sim, pra quem não entende, isso é meio creep]).
JUNHO 2020
Lars voltou, veio para estar comigo no meu aniversário, inclusive ele me presenteou com Find Me do André Aciman, ele disse que queria me dar a muito tempo, pois em novembro do ano passado eu estava lendo Call me by your name e eu estava namorando pra comprar o livro quando fosse lançado, mas não deu nem tempo dele poder comprar na época.
No meu aniversário, resolvi cozinhar para comemorar, fazer escondidinho de frango. Eu estava de folga e queria fazer algo especial para Karls, Darls, Akarls e Lars. Eu passei a tarde e começo da noite cozinhando e Lars me ajudando.
Então, aconteceu o estopim de todo o caos.
Karls e Darls desceram e viram que o escondidinho não estava pronta ainda, ela fechou a cara e disse "Nossa, ainda não está pronto?". Depois eles fizeram um sanduíche e comeram e subiram, bastou aquilo pra me entristecer, até entendo que ela poderia estar com fome, mas ela bater porta de armário e a porta da geladeira acabou todo o meu ânimo, me senti super mal.
Comi aquele escondidinho triste, o clima na mesa estava tenso e na boa o que era pra ser uma comemoração no que eu acreditava ser entre família, foi a porcaria de um jantar de aniversário que eu perdi tempo fazendo.
Lars voltou pra casa dele, continuamos nos falando e estreitando os laços, aproveitando a companhia um do outro, e finalmente no meio de toda essa situação de merda que estamos vivendo no planeta, senti uma esperança de que talvez tudo daria certo, pelo menos uma vez.
Mais uma vez, ele veio passar o fim de semana aqui em casa, e foi divertido, assistimos filme, contamos piadas e o melhor, eu estava podendo dormir abraçado com ele, por a cabeça no travesseiro e não me sentir só.
JULHO 2020
O mês do caos, eu odeio Julho, por tantos motivos, sério. Eu tenho inúmeras histórias de desgraças nesse mês que PQP (Gif da Xuxa).
Lars me mandou mensagem dizendo que ele teve uma briga terrível com o sobrinho dele, na briga eles só faltaram sair na porrada, ele falou que estava mal por estar na casa da irmã dele e por toda essa indisposição com o sobrinho que tem 18 anos e é um completo folgado. Ele disse que iria procurar um lugar pra ficar, mas até lá, ele perguntou se poderia ficar aqui até encontrar esse lugar.
E como eu já fui colocado pra fora de casa pelo meu tio e me vi sozinho, eu sei o quanto é importante ter alguém pra estender uma mão amiga nessa hora.
Eu respondi que sim, mas que ia comunicar o Karls e o Akarls. Expliquei a situação Lars e eles falaram que tudo bem.
A Karls começou a fazer um freela permanente em um grande estúdio aqui de SP, então ela já não estava ficando em casa e quando estava, ficava a maior parte do tempo com o Darls, que ficou aqui em casa, mesmo ela trabalhando regularmente, já que as coisas estão flexibilizadas por aqui.
A princípio, Lars ficaria aqui até dia 10, ele tinha acertado de ir morar com um pessoal que ele achou num grupo do Facebook, mas o lugar onde esse pessoal ia morar não deu certo, pelo o que ele me contou, foi lance com a Porto Seguro, ele ficou decepcionado, porque os meninos eram legais. Então, ele voltou para a busca de encontrar um lugar pra ficar, eu inocente disse que ele poderia ficar o tempo que precisasse.
Interiormente, eu queria me redimir por toda a injustiça que foi o nosso início, queria fazer certo dessa vez, pois ele estava sendo bom pra mim e eu nunca tinha tido isso, esse convívio.
Enquanto ele estava aqui, comecei a ter companhia para o almoço, passei a comer direito, já que ele é obrigado a comer certo por causa da diabetes, eu estava até me alimentando nos horários certos. As noites assistíamos séries abraçados, até a hora de dormir. Parecia um oasis no meio de todo esse inferno que estamos vivendo, por um único instante eu esqueci de tudo de ruim.
Nesse período, ele estava procurando vários quartos, mas só encontrava cativeiros sendo alugados por mercenários.
Conforme o mês ia passando, Karls estava bem estressada com tudo e quando estava todo mundo na cozinha, ela parecia evitar querer falar com ele. No início, eu pensei que fosse TPM ou alguma coisa em particular dela com Darls.
Mas eu tive certeza que era alguma coisa com o Lars, no dia que estávamos jantando e ela veio informar que o botijão de gás tinha acabado e ela tinha comprado um novo, mas ela insinuou que estávamos cozinhando demais. Eu fiquei, sem reação, pois não esperava por aquilo, como eu falei, ela e o Darls estavam fazendo todas as receitas que existiam na internet, como que o Lars 10 dia aqui era a causa do botijão ter acabado?
Então aquilo começou a ficar espinhoso e o meu erro foi não ter confrontado. Eu comecei a me sentir acuado com o Lars e não sabia o que fazer, ele já estava numa puta situação frágil por ter saído da casa da irmã por indisposição com o sobrinho e a coisa que eu mais queria era que ele se sentisse confortável na minha própria casa.
No meio de tudo isso, ele voltou a trabalhar e eu passei a acordar cedo junto com ele, pra tomar café e abrir o portão pra ele poder sair, num desses dias, eu levantei e fui no banheiro e enquanto eu usava, a Karls bateu na porta perguntando quem é que estava lá dentro de uma maneira meio ríspida, no caso era eu, mas o Lars viu a situação toda, ele não me falou, mas eu reparei que ele parou de tomar banho de manhã antes do trabalho. Dizia ele que o banho da noite era suficiente.
Depois, ele parou de tomar café da manhã, disse que tomaria café na cafeteria que ele trabalha.
A próxima coisa que aconteceu foi um dia que eu estava na cozinha e fui informado que Karls e Akarls decidiram que não iríamos mais fazer as compras de mercado juntos. E que só manteríamos os produtos de limpeza e higiene e que o resto era cada um por si.
Confesso, que na hora não compreendi o que estava acontecendo, eu estava muito desligado, na verdade não acreditava que os meus amigos estavam me excluindo por causa do Lars, eu estava sendo ingênuo, pois não imaginaria que aquilo estava acontecendo.
No meio desse caos todo, Lars, virou pra mim e disse que a irmã dele pediu que ele fosse na casa dela. Então ele iria direto do trabalho e dormiria lá no sábado para o domingo, já que estaria de folga e voltaria pra cá no domingo a noite.
Só que ele não voltou, ele disse que a irmã dele pediu para que ele dormisse lá mais uma noite. Pensei, okay, ele vem então amanhã direto do trabalho pra cá, mas aí ele não veio na segunda, foi quando o peso de tudo bateu.
A essa altura eu já estava angustiado com tudo aquilo e direcionei minha frustração para o lado errado, em vez de confrontar quem estava causando toda essa situação insatistória, eu cobrei dele, porque ele não estava aqui. Perguntei, porque ele não queria estar mais aqui. Ele falou que queria. Então, eu perguntei porque o domingo, virou segunda e agora a segunda virou terça? Ele hesitou, aí eu perguntei se era por causa da Karls e ele disse que só não queria incomodar ninguém.
Eu fiquei mal, por ele se sentir mais incomodado na minha casa do que na casa da irmã dele com o sobrinho folgado que estava fazendo da vida dele um inferno.
Fiquei desapontado, ele veio na quarta, conversei com ele, disse que iria conversar com a Karls sobre toda essa situação. Mas já era tarde.
Era a última semana de Julho, e antes mesmo que eu pudesse conversar com a Karls, Akarls chegou dizendo que não dava mais para dividirmos a conta de água como estávamos fazendo, por 3, teríamos que dividir por 5, já que a conta ficou mais cara.
Na sexta-feira daquela semana, Lars encontrou um quarto numa casa que ele meio que alugou as pressas e ele se mudaria na primeira segunda de agosto. Quando eu pude confrontar Karls, no sábado, sobre tudo aquilo, já era tarde. Falei que fiquei chateado deles quererem repartir a conta da casa por 5 com o Lars pelo mês que ele passou aqui, mas isso nunca foi nem cogitado nos 5 meses do Darls aqui. Falei que fiquei decepcionado por ela não ser capaz de enxergar a minha felicidade. Por não ser capaz de ver o quanto eu estava feliz, como eu enxerguei a felicidade dela com o Darls e o recebemos de bom grado dentro de casa por causa da felicidade dela. Disse que foi muito cômodo pra ela ter alguém pra poder dormir junto, assistir coisas juntos, ter os momentos a dois e quando eu pude ter o mesmo, ela não olhou para mim com os mesmos olhos.
Enfim, Lars se mudou, tomei esse tempo que poderia estar assistindo uma série com ele para escrever tudo isso. Angustiado e decepcionado. Darls não tem culpa de nada do que está acontecendo, mas agora acho completamente injusto ele estar aqui e o Lars não estar, não sei o que fazer, minha vontade é de falar, "acabou a quarentena para os dois, pode voltar para sua casa". Me sinto injustiçado e triste por alguém que eu amo tanto, não ter sido capaz de enxergar que eu estava feliz. É isso, estou esperando a próxima sessão da minha terapia e Karls e Darls estão lá no quarto dela e eu estou só.
E para finalizar, essa foi minha conversa agora a pouco com o Lars.
Lars https://imgur.com/gallery/PRrxEI6
submitted by denesfernando to TurmaFeira [link] [comments]


2020.07.28 19:40 InsanityFy New to the MoDaoZuShi World?

New to the MoDaoZuShi World?

https://preview.redd.it/16zumbo8xmd51.png?width=900&format=png&auto=webp&s=43a09fe191ce13d09ff6f52943ae3c29ec76258f
Did you watch 'The Untamed/CQL' or the Donghua and now you're just absolutely in love with MDZS? And you found this sub and there's SO much and you're just overwhelemed?
Dear excited yet lost and confused about the whole MDZS universe, here's our guide into the wonderfully varied and fantastic world of MDZS. Buckle up, there's a lot! (and maybe grab a snack while reading)

https://preview.redd.it/wu94ant9xmd51.png?width=500&format=png&auto=webp&s=f7ccd98babfbeeebf004166db66f6f3c22e7388c

Mo Dao Zu Shi - The Novel

The novel, Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (魔道祖师, Mó Dào ZǔShī; also: Founder of Diabolism) is a Chinese danmei (BL) web novel by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu, originally published on the Chinese web novel site JJWXC from October 31, 2015 - March 1, 2016, with additional side stories that continue to be released sporadically. The revised version of the main story was later published online until September 7, 2016. A formal paperback version was then published by PINSIN STUDIO (平心出版) was released on December 12, 2016, with a total of four volumes.
As for trasnlations, unfortunately there is no official english tranlsation, however the Exiled Rebel Translations took upon the porject and now have it fully translated on their website here. We have a few ongoing translations from 2 users on the sub currently which you can check out from the links on our sidebar.
The novel, after receiving a huge populaity, now has multiple adaptations, including a Manhua, an Animation, an Audio Drama, and a live-action Web Series.
Since the novel is the origin, it is the most uncensored of all the versions and is clearly a BL, exploring kinks and what not in the extra set of chapters. We advise the readers to be aware of this.

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Mo Dao Zu Shi - The Donghua/Anime

The MoDaoZuShi Donghua, also named 魔道祖师; pinyin: Mó Dào Zǔ Shī, is produced by Tencent Penguins and B.C May Pictures.
The donghua is in Mandarin and moves at a slightly fast pace but mostly follows the flow of the original book, unlike The Untamed where all the flashbacks are grouped into one. However, there were some changes to the plot. Certain monsters and major plot points were revealed earlier on in the series. The series is censored but hints at homosexuality are still made. At the end of the second season, the story left off right before the Yi City arc.
The first season, 15 episodes, aired from July 9 to October 6, 2018. The first two episodes were 32 minutes long, while the rest were 24 minutes long. The second season aired from August 3, 2019 to August 31, 2019 with only 8 episodes. All episodes in season two were 24 minute long. Season 3 has already been confirmed and is rumored to be released sometimes in 2021.
The best place to watch the series would be on YouTube by a channel called Tencent Videos. There are subtitles in Arabic, English, Korean, Portuguese, Spanish, and more are being added.
The Korean Dubbing version was aired here-%EB%A7%88%EB%8F%84%EC%A1%B0%EC%82%AC-1%EA%B8%B0) during may 2020.
On July 31st, 2020, a chibi mini series, titled “MDZS Q”, made its debut with its first episode. New episodes will be aired on We TV every Friday. Currently, the episodes are initially available for VIP viewers only; however, there is a possibility that they will be opened for non-VIP viewers in the future. The chibi mini series is a spin-off of the main donghua, with the intent to focus on lighthearted moments to provide a respite from the heavier content of the main storyline. More details here
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The Unatmed/ CQL - The Live Action Drama

'The Untamed, or 陈情令 (Chén Qíng Lìng) as it is known in Chinese (hence giving birth to its colloquial nickname, CQL, online) is the live-action drama version of MDZS, comprising of fifty episodes. Starring Xiao Zhan as Wei Wuxian and Wang Yibo as Lan Wangji (voiced by Lu Zhixing and Bian Jiang respectively, both of whom reprised their roles in the audio drama as well as donghua), the show was an instant hit both within China and globally. The show was praised for its captivating displays of acting as well as its heart-wrenching soundtrack, amongst much more. Due to Chinese censorship laws, however, the romantic relationship between the main leads has been toned down to meaningful stares and wistful glances – more implicit than explicit, but nonetheless evident. Additionally, this is the only adaptation of the novel that is not termed ‘MDZS’ since its storyline differs significantly from the original – to the point where it may be considered a slightly canon-divergent alternative universe.
Production for the drama lasted a little over two years, and after that the project was announced in early 2018, with filming ending in August of the same year. It first aired on Tencent Video in June 2019, and is currently available for free streaming, complete with subtitles, on WeTV, Netflix, Viki as well as YouTube!
Aside from the actual drama itself, the CQL production teams also released a 20-episode ‘Special Edition’ of the show, focusing mainly on the relationship between our main leads, with a rearrangement of the drama’s ending. Two spin-off films were subsequently produced: ‘The Living Dead’ and ‘Fatal Journey’, focusing on secondary characters and their development – both of these are available, subtitled, for purchase on the iQiyi app.'
Anyone who's craving for more in terms of the BL aspect of the story, can give the novel a try, since it is the completely uncensored version of the story. (beware the extra chapters are explicit)

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Mo Dao Zu Shi - The Manhua/Manga

The MDZS web comic, or manhua, is titled the same as the novel, and was first published on December 8th, 2017. It has been drawn by Mao Tuan Xiao Jian Jian and Luo Di Cheng Qiu, with HAloggzIt behind the cover illustration. The manhua is one of the two media of the franchise that is currently ongoing; as of July 27th, 2020 – the date of the latest update – the most recent chapter is 142, and is updated at the rate of one new chapter every week. Officially released in Chinese by kuaikanmanhua, the official English translation is available at WeComics but kindly note that chapter 100 onwards, they are accessible only for VIPs. Fan-translated versions of the manhua, in English as well as French and Polish, may be found here on Mangadex.
The manhua, in a fashion similar to the audio drama, closely follows the novel and stays true to it, but is more censored than the aforementioned two – although the censorship restrictions are looser here, nothing explicit is depicted, but smaller scenes like kisses have been omitted as well thus far.
The manhua has been well-received both globally and within China as well, even winning ‘Best Manhua’ at the China Golden Rooster and Hundred Flowers Film Festival (1st Network Drama Awards).

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Mo Dao Zu Shi - The Audio Drama

The MDZS audio drama, or广播剧, is a spellbinding, captivating adaptation of the original novel by Mo Xian Tong Xiu, produced by Polar Penguin Studios and released in June 2018. The drama is closely based on the original novel and its production was supervised by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu herself. It consists of three seasons, with numerous additional “bonus” chapters and snippets featuring a rotating cast of characters.
The audio drama was a critical and financial success, praised for its storyline, high production value, and voice actors’ performances, including those of Lu Zhixin in his first performance as Wei Wu Xian (reprised later in The Untamed) and Bian Jiang as Lan Wang Ji (reprised in the donghua). The drama is available exclusively on the Chinese audio streaming website Miss Evans/猫耳FM, where all three seasons remain as the website’s top 3 most listened-to series. As of June 2020, the series has garnered 400 million playbacks.
The audio drama's massive popularity and success led to its Japanese adaptation, which was produced by Brave Hearts studio and began airing in January 2020 via MiMiFM and Miss Evans FM. The drama is not officially translated into English, but fans have worked to create and release an English subtitled version that is available on the web.

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Merchandise

'The MDZS franchise has a vast and beautiful collection of official merchandise, from adorable plushies and headbands, to even cosmetics! The author of the novel has explicitly forbidden the distribution of unofficial merchandise, so kindly keep that in mind during your perusal of the Internet in this purpose. Since the official distributors are all based in China and use Taobao as their platform of choice, many gracious fans have taken it upon themselves to prepare guides in order to help international supporters.
One such example is this Tumblr post by user kittykat2010, which details both the relevant websites and how to operate them.
Additionally, you can visit here for The Untamed merchandise in particular.

https://preview.redd.it/zqd3afpfxmd51.png?width=500&format=png&auto=webp&s=74c4095d588008535ae3e1fd7216d432b1050471

Fan-Fictions & Fan-Art Community

The MDZS fandom is one grandly talented community full to the brim with mind-blowingly gorgeous fan fictions and Fan art that encompasses all genres and ships alike – you are bound to find something that will tickle your fancy and leave you awestruck at the sheer brilliance of the artist and writers. Fix its, modern AUs, canon divergent stories are common tags for the FFs while modern AUs to re-enacted scenes from one of the other media for the fanarts, we have everything – and on all platforms you could think of, too!
Fanfictions are best found of 'Archiveofourown' or 'tumblr'. Fanarts, while the more popular ones are circulated on Twitter, you may also turn to Reddit, Instagram, Tumblr, Weibo/Oasis, wherever it is that suits you best, and all you need to do is type in ‘MDZS’ or ‘魔道祖师’ in Chinese to enter the never-ending universe of diverse and beautiful fan art, produced by fans from every corner of the world.

TL;DR (links in detailed para)

The novel - is the original, in chinese, has English fan-translations available. Most uncensored.
The Donghua - currently 2 seasons in. Season 3 announced for 2021; had been dubbed in Korean recently; is censored so far
MDZS Q (Donghua Chibi Version) - started airing 31st July, 5 minutes, 2 episodes every Friday.
The Live Action (The Unatmed/ Chen Qing Ling) - the most popular one; 50 episodes (has 20 ep special edition); is censored. (but trust me BL is evident)
The Manhua - Comics version not yet finished, translated in English by fan group; censored so far (but has unofficial uncensored kiss)
The Audio Drama - complete and available in Chinese (with fan subs) and Japanese. Is critically considered to be the best version; is uncensored; 3 seasons.
Merch - MDZS has a world of official merch available, for both the Anime and the live action. MXTX, the author forbids any unoffcial merch so please be advised.
Fanfictions and Fanarts - the community is rich with wonderful writers and artists. AO3, tumblr, twitter are all full of rich works that you can explore and find solace in when the original story hurts you loool
submitted by InsanityFy to MoDaoZuShi [link] [comments]


2020.07.25 12:11 VashxShanks All the Major Released JRPG Translation Projects Guide! [2018 to July 2020]

Another day another guide, here is one I have always wanted to do, but didn't have time for, a translation oatch guide for the big releases that happened in the past 2 years or so for JRPGs, also know that This isn't ALL of them, just the ones I found note worthy, and there is still more but I ran out of space, but please do post anyone you think should have been here. I hope you find this helpful.

Important Notes:

  • Each title will include links to the translation group site if avilable, and/or to the romhacking project page.
  • Each title will also include links to a youtube trailer or gameplay footage.
  • The descriptions are either taken from the project pages (romhacking), the translation group website, or are written by me in case they had no description in either websites.
  • The dates are for the patch release, and Not the game's release.
  • Credits to individuals from each translation team are either in the project pages, or the translation group website.
  • I would like to thank all the people involved in these translation projects, for their hard work and love for the community.

Translation Projects Released in 2018:

Asuncia: Matsue no Jubaku - PS1 - 09 January 2018.

Asuncia: Matsue no Jubaku is a role playing game for the PlayStation.
An odd sort of RPG, with a simple storyline. Its strategic elements involve fighting your way through a series of randomly generated maps. You earn a score by protecting towns, defeating dungeons, defeating monsters in specific combinations and such. Through the Story Mode, you unlock characters and levels for the quick battle mode.

Shin Seikoku: La Wares - SNES - 14 February 2018:

In this 1995 J-Force-developed, Yukata-published RPG you get a fairly unique mix of medieval fantasy combined with mecha armour. The game is an official adaptation of popular Japanese pen and paper RPG brand Wares Blade, featuring Golems (mechs) from an ancient civilization that can only be piloted by certain people and shape the entire concept of civilization and warfare. The combat takes place in a Dragon Quest/Phantasy Star first-person viewpoint, but it's divided into classic party combat in the dungeons and Golem combat in boss fights and over-world encounters.
The game starts with a plot by a shady bunch to revive one of the eight sacred Golems and the unlikely pair of main protagonists: The young bandit Chiffon and tomboy princess Michelda. You can sample the new English translation in the prologue below. If the characters and box artwork style look familiar, you are probably a Sailor Moon fan. No, those designs are not just inspired by Kazuko Tadano, those are her actual creations! She was part of the team working in the game and these certainly translate her style very well.

MegaMan Battle Network Operate Star Force - NDS - 22 February 2018:

Rockman EXE Operate Star Force was originally released for the Nintendo DS in Japan in 2009. It never saw a statewide release. It’s generally regarded as a low-effort port of the first Battle Network, but with a Star Force crossover scenario tacked on. Despite this reputation, the game still improves the first Battle Network in many ways such as various minor text, graphic, and balance changes throughout the game. The game also includes the new multi-player Star Colo mode.

The Legend of Heroes: Trails To Azure - PSP - 28 February 2018:

Eiyuu Densetsu: Ao no Kiseki is a turn-based role playing game for the PlayStation Portable and is the fifth entry in Falcom’s Kiseki franchise and the direct sequel to Zero no Kiseki.

Importnat Note:

The translation group The Geofront, who did "Trails from Zero", are working on translating this game too, Here is a link to their website page, and I am told their releases are of higher quality than this one, in case you want to wait.

Atelier Marie+Elie: The Alchemists of Salburg-Episodes 1 & 2 - PS2 - 18 March 2018:

A remaster of the two first titles in the Gust’s Atelier series, Atelier Marie: The Alchemist of Salburg, and Atelier Elie: The Alchemist of Salburg 2, which features redrawn and improved graphics, a reworked graphical interface, and redone mini-games.
In Atelier Marie, the worst student in the Academy, Marlone, is given a final chance by her teacher Ingrid to graduate by making a special item in a span of five years. Therefore, Marie will have to adventure throughout the lands surrounding Salburg to find ingredients to synthesize items, take requests from the local bar to make money, and make friends with the adventurers that will escort her through the monster-filled lands.
In Atelier Elie, a newly-enrolled student called Elfir must overcome the fact that she entered the Academy under special conditions by proving herself as a capable alchemist in the Contest the Academy holds once a year, while also looking for clues about the person who saved her life when she was about to die from the plague. In addition to traveling around Salburg, Elfir’s journeys in search of ingredients will take her to even more distant places, with even more items to find and more people to meet.

Digimon Adventure - PSP - 23 March 2018:

Digimon Adventure is a JRPG that follows the first season of the Digimon anime. A group of kids get caught up in a freak snowstorm, and are transported to the Digital World. There they meet some strange monsters named Digimon and try to find their way back to the real world.

G.O.D.: Mezameyo to Yobu Koe ga Kikoe - SNES - 01 April 2018:

The year is 1999. A boy named Gen lives together with his mother in a small Japanese city. One day he goes to the nearby mountains and discovers an underground cave. In this cave, he encounters a strange bat-like creature guarding what appears to be a huge diamond. When Gen approaches the diamond, the floor crumbles, and all he can see is a group of aliens descending on the Earth… Gen is awakened by a man in a military uniform. He quickly gets up, and notices a calendar. The year is 2009! Ten years have passed, of which there is no recollection in Gen’s memory. The world has changed a lot during those years. Aliens have invaded the Earth, many cities are destroyed, and he finds himself amidst the members of an underground resistance movement. Now he has to travel all over the world, help the humans in their struggle, and discover the secret of the invasion.
The game is a console-style RPG with randomly encountered enemies whom you fight in turn-based combat viewed from “over-the-shoulder” perspective, similar to Phantasy Star IV. Gen and other party members develop special powers called “chakra”, which can be leveled up just like the characters themselves.

Last Bible III - SNES - 12 April 2018:

The Last Bible series of games began on the Game Boy as a spinoff of the Megami Tensei franchise. Instead of the usual near-future apocalypse setting, Last Bible’s setting is closer to light medieval fantasy. Combat is turn-based, and retains the Megaten standard of being able to persuade enemies to join your team, as well as fusing them together to create stronger beasts.

Super Robot Taisen A Portable - PSP - 19 June 2018:

The story is independent from other entries, so the game can be played regardless of whether you have played Original Generation for instance. You will however play as either Axel or Lamia, whose stories are more fleshed out here than in the GBA entries. As is the tradition in Super Robot Wars, the story branches on some occasions to invite you to multiple playthroughs.
The game features a special “evasion erosion” mechanism, and enemies with a lot of evasion. This has made fans consider this game as one of the harder entries in the Super Robot Wars series.
Other game features include (skippable) battle animations with voices, in-battle and in-dialog save options, multiple spirits casting in a single action, multiple pilots for some of the bigger mechs.
This is actually a PlayStation Portable remake of the Game Boy Advance game with the same title (without “Portable”). Some of the features mentioned above were not present on its GBA counterpart, and the graphics are obviously higher res’ and re-done.

Super Famicom Wars - SNES - 21 July 2018:

The immediate ancestor to the beloved turn-based tactics game Advance Wars, Super Famicom Wars is a turn-based military strategy game developed by Intelligent Systems, published by Nintendo and first released on May 1 1998. It can be regarded as the direct successor to the original Famicom Wars, vastly improving on the original game while retaining its core ideas. The game was made available exclusively via the Nintendo Power re-writable cartridge system, making it one of the hardest Super Famicom titles to obtain today.
During the months prior to its Nintendo Power release several teasedemo versions of Super Famicom Wars were released on the Satellaview broadcast service, each featuring one map from the full game. Super Famicom Wars have later been re-released on Wii and Wii U as part of the Virtual Console library, again exclusively in Japan.
While most fans will agree that the series made huge improvements with each consecutive game at least up until the first Advance Wars title, Super Famicom Wars does offer a few unique features and enough original flavor to make it stand out as a great game in its own right.

Aretha - SNES - 03 September 2018:

In a far away land, war was raging, as an evil ruler sent his troops to invade the castle of a mighty king. His minions stormed the castle and burnt it down. The king could not escape his fate, and the villain thought no one was spared by his wrath...
Present time. You are Ariel, a little girl who lives with her old wise grandmother in a small house near a mountain range, north to the forest. She just turned ten, and the grandmother sends her on a seemingly simple quest: to go through the forest to Nineveh, the nearby town, and to meet there a certain person. But what starts as a simple assignment soon develops into the quest for magic powers of Aretha, the ultimate battle against the evil, and the discovery of Ariel's own true identity.
The game is a console-style RPG, where Ariel and her party travel on the world map, through forests, mountain paths, and caves, occasionally visiting towns and fighting monsters in turn-based combat viewed from first-person perspective, using a variety of physical and special attacks.
Important Note: The 2nd game, Aretha 2 was also translated and released by the same group, you can find the patch in the same gourp's website.

Super Robot Wars Gaiden: The Elemental Lords - Masoukishin - SNES - 04 September 2018:

Super Robot Wars Gaiden follows the original story of Masaki Andoh, herald of the Elemental Lord Cybuster, both before and after events of the original Super Robot Wars canon (SRW 2, 3, EX, 4.) It is the first Super Robot War to only contain original characters and plots, the first (and one of the few) to have its robots represented in a realistic, non-SD style, the first to be isometric. It and its followups are the only SRWs to feature directional and height modifiers to damage and accuracy calculations. Due to its nature as an original story, and due to it taking place at the very beginning of Masaki’s timeline, it serves as an excellent entry point into the Super Robot Wars series.

Laplace no Ma - SNES - 06 September 2018:

Laplace’s Demon is a horror RPG with a Lovecraftian bent. Set in the fictional town of Newcam, Massachusetts in 1924, the player and several paranormal investigators look into some disturbing rumors surrounding a mansion on the outskirts of town.

Tenshi no Uta: Shiroki Tsubasa no Inori - SNES - 14 October 2018:

Song of the Angel was a game released in 1994 by Telnet Japan and had many of the developers who would eventually form the famous ‘Wolf Team’ that brought us Tales of Phantasia and Star Ocean! Many musical tracks were also done by the same composer too. Play the game, and the music and atmosphere will be very familiar to fans of the aforementioned games. Even though the game is rather obscure, its developers certainly are not!
The gameplay is the typical 1994 RPG battle engine, with a few additions. The most notable addition is the Parley system. This system allows you to parley with monsters using several languages in order to befriend or negotiate outcomes. Options include gaining gold, purchasing special items, gaining experience, raising friendship points, and more! There are day/night cycles that effect dialog as well as changing wares in certain shops. You will walk, teleport, sail on a boat, and fly on an ancient ark by the time your adventure concludes.
Tenshi No Uta is a love story at its core. A young man named Rayard meets a traveling circus performer and songstress named Callana. They fall in love early, but part ways due to Callana’s traveling lifestyle. After many days of misery, Rayard pulls himself together and sets out to tell Callana how he really feels. Thus, the real journey begins! This game has angels, demons, and even Satan himself! The story and writing are the stand-outs of this game. If you appreciate substance over style, you’ll enjoy this game for its charming core!

7th Dragon 2020-II - PSP - 22 October 2018:

7th Dragon 2020-II is a direct sequel to 7th Dragon 2020. Producer Rieko Kodama (Phantasy Star, Skies of Arcadia), composer Yuzo Kushiro (Streets of Rage, Etrian Odyssey) and character designer Shirow Miwa (Dogs, Kiznaiver) return, as does Hatsune Miku herself.
It is essentially a dungeon crawler in a world control by dragons, but of course it adds it's own twist to the formula. You get to create your own party members (gendeclass/ect...).

Shin Megami Tensei if... - SNES - 25 October 2018:

The third primary SNES Shin Megami Tensei title, if... is a bit of an odd duck. Gone are the sweeping stories of biblical conflict, gone are the branching stories based on your choices and alignment, though your alignment is still present. Instead, if tells the story of a disturbed teenager who makes a deal with a demon, and in doing so drags his school, his classmates, and his teachers into the Abyss, where they are subjected to various tortures modeled after the seven deadly sins. Instead of having path splits based on alignment, individual changes to your story are determined by which of four partners you recruit at the very beginning of the game, one of whom is only available on subsequent playthroughs. The more character-oriented plot and the high school setting almost makes this feel more like a Persona game (or a Devil Summoner game, if you discount the high school bits) than a mainstream SMT.
In fact, there are distinct parallels that can be drawn between if and the Persona games, especially the first one. The plots are somewhat similar, for one - the final dungeons in both games are essentially the creations of one of the main characters´ psyches. The female version of if...´s main character is canonically Tamaki Uchida, who shows up in Persona 1 as a student and in Persona 2 as a Devil Summoner employed by the Kuzunoha Detective Agency. And whenever the protagonist or partner characters die, they acquire a new "Guardian," a demon whose darkened image sits behind their portrait and that grants them spells and stat bonuses... sound familiar? Unlike personas however, Guardians cannot be freely swapped or fused; a character unfortunately needs to be killed in battle in order to receive a new Guardian.

Majin Tensei II: Spiral Nemesis - SNES - 09 December 2018:

The 2nd game in the series, and it's like the first one, but just with more everything, and more focus on the story this time around, as for the story, will demons invade and you know the drill.
Of course just as the first game, this is a Fire Emblem like turn-based game, think Devil Survivor, but years before it, so its not far fetched to see this is the original Devil survivor game.

Ni no Kuni: Shikkoku no Madoushi - NDS - 09 December 2018:

The Original Ni Nu Kuni that came before the PS3 version, and while it ends earlier then where the PS3 version ends, it still has exclusive content to compensate, it has a unique turn-based battle system, a magic system that uses the styles and needs you to read through the magic book that was given with the game. The book was also translated of course.

.hack//LINK - PSP - 15 December 2018:

.hack//Link's story starts in a new version of “The World,” a popular series of MMORPGs known as The World: RX, and essntially it's a kind of a crossovefan-service action game rpg for all the different .hack games, you'll meet and join all the famouse and well known characters from the games in the series.

Translation Projects Released in 2019:

Linkle Liver Story - Sega Saturn - 02 January 2019:

This is an action RPG, though it's light on the RPG part, the gampelay is similar to Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, but with some really good looking and smooth animations.

Medarot R - PS1 - 23 May 2019:

Medarot R is an RPG starring the characters of the Medabots franchise.
The battles take place on a separate field and they are turn-based. Each Medabot has separate health bars for the legs, arms and the head. Defeating a medabot is done by destroying the head part and each body part can have its own attack that players can use until the part has been destroyed. Up to 3 Medabots can take part in combat and some attacks have a limited ammo.
While sharing the characters from the Anime series, the story is loosely based on it and the story of the second Game Boy game. The game starts with Ikki waking up on his birthday to find a Medabot in his room - a present from his parents. Without a medal though, the Medabot is useless. After witnessing a customer at the store trying to sell his Medabot to the storekeeper, Ikki is engaged in a battle with the customer and receives a medal from the Phantom Renegade so he could confront the pesky salesman.
Players will gain experience to level up their medals, as well as win new parts for their Medabots after winning battles. Players can also spend money on parts if they want to.
A unique feature of the game is the Weather Forecast which is given by a Medabot and which offers hints on what would happen during the day. (Description taken from the Moby Games page)

Fire Emblem: Thracia 776- SNES - 31 May 2019:

It's The last Fire Emblem game to be made by the series original creator Shouzou Kaga, if you haven't played a Shouzou Kaga Fire Emblem game then you are missing out on what made the series so good to begin with, number wise it's the 5th FE game. It takes place between chapter 5 and 8 of Fire Emblem: Genealogy of the Holy War, and it attempts to improve on it while changing and adding new feature that since have become a stable of the series, also fun fact, Genealogy of the Holy War is considered by most fans to be one of the best FE games ever made.
While it doesn't have the gigantic maps that FE: Genealogy of the Holy War had with it's multi-castle capturing objectives, they are still big by today's standards and they traded in the extra size for more intricate map designs. It's the First FE game to have the Rescue system, which one unit basically takes another unit and drags it with it, it's used to take out units that are in danger of dying out of combat, and to protect weaker units.
The First FE game to have the Capture system. First FE game to have Fog of War, increasing the difficulty even further because you never know what's ahead of you while moving, and can run into enemies at any time.
First FE game to have the Fatigue system. The First FE game to have Gaiden Chapters, which are Extra chapters that are unlocked by meeting specific requirements in the previous chapter, where the player can get a new item or characters, and learn more about the story. The First FE game to have Escape chapters, which are chapters where you have to run away while while fighting unlimited amounts of enemy reinforcements, also your units can be captured in these chapters, and if they were, they can still be rescued in the Gaiden Chapters. First FE game to have Weapon Ranks along with Genealogy of the Holy War , but it is the first game where you are be able to increase the ranks by gaining weapon experience.
Finally, this is a challenging game, if you are used to the current FE style, then don't go into this expecting the same hand holding you get in the current FE games, seriously this game is considered to be one of, if not, the hardest game in all of the FE series.

Majin Tensei - SNES - 09 August 2019:

The first ever spin-off for the SMT series, and the 2nd SMT game ever (after Shin Megami Tensei) to be developed by Atuls.
With a story that follows closely the Manga by the same name, it's actually a Strategy turn-based game, similar to the Devil Survivor series, but with gameplay closer to Fire Emblem.
The story has multiple Endings, and while it might not as heavy on story as others in the series, it makes it for it with gameplay. But either way, if you're a fan of the series, this isn't one you want to miss.

Super Robot Wars OG Saga: Endless Frontier EXCEED - NDS - 13 October 2019:

The SRWOG Saga: Endless Frontier series, is a JRPG spinoff of the famous SRW series made for the DS, by Banpresto and co-developed Monolith Soft (Xenoblade/Xenosaga), but with a completely different combat system and universe.
To put it simply, if you ever played Namco X Capcom or Project x Zone, then you'll immediately be familiar with the concept of this game, to put it simply, it's a crossover game with characters from different games are teleported into the world of the Endless Frontier, a world that is already made out of a combination of multiple worlds connected via Gates. Of course this is a very bare idea of the games world, but it's enough for you to get the idea. Though the amount of game series that are in this crossover world are only 3 (excluding the Endless Frontier), SRW OG, Xenosaga, and Namco X Capcom.
The game's combat system is a mix of traditional turned based combat and a very well done Combo juggling System, probably the best version of this combat system right now, it's tweaked and balanced to maximize the fun value of the system, and just when you thought it couldn't get any better, BAM! comes SRWOG Saga: Endless Frontier Exceed to blow you away, sadly only the first one was offically released in English, but here comes Artema Translations to save the day, enjoy.

Hero Senki: Project Olympus - SNES - 24 December 2019:

Hero Senki is a crossover RPG. It is similar in style to Super Robot Wars but features tokusatsu characters such as Kamen Rider and Ultraman alongside Gundam characters. It is also the first appearance of Gilliam Jaeger, a dimension-hopping traveler who goes on to appear in several Super Robot War titles.

Mega Man Battle Network 4.5: Real Operation - GBA - 28 November 2019:

An outlier in the series, lacking the traditional story and battle system that players had come to expect. The game places you in the role of the operator; instead of controlling just MegaMan, you can choose from over 20 different NetNavis to play. In battle, you don’t control your Navi directly, but they move on their own, and you are restricted to sending them commands and BattleChips. The game featured a Real-Time Clock, and its slimmed-down single player campaign revolved around an Internet that changes in real-time, even while the game is shut off.

Sakura Wars - Sega Saturn - 18 December 2019:

Sakura Wars is a Tactical Mecha JRPG, but this one is more of a dating-sim/JRPG hybrid, while it does have mecha combat, the focus of the game is split between playing through a VN/dating-sim like gameplay where you make choices and decisions that will affect your relationships with the rest of the female cast of your party, while the other half of the game is a really satisfying ass kicking mecha action, and this game doesn't hold back because you can use killing moves galore, the whole combat is really flashy and a treat to watch.
The game also doesn't keep those two halves separate from each other, because both will affect the other, especially how the main character (you) behave during the VN/dating-sim part of the game, every choices you make, of which there will be a lot of, because this game is all about having you make choices and give a reactions to whatever happens to you or infront of you, and this is done by the series famous and classic system called LIPS, or Live & Interactive Picture System, and the choices you make will not only change the relations between you and the rest of the female cast, but will also change the relations they have between each other, and that will reflected on the battlefield.

Translation Projects Released in 2020:

Earth Seeker - Wii - 06 January 2020:

Stranded on a foreign planet is the least of your concerns in Earth Seeker, that place is full of monsters. Stop time in the real time battles to combo them. There are no complicated sequence of inputs, this easy to master system will appeal to players who are unaccustomed to action games or turn based battles.
Besides stopping time, players can recruit allies into their team. The inhabitants of the planet Guardians each master their element. With a bit of alcohol in your possession, you can have them fight for you. Come explore this dangerous and colorful world.(Description taken from the dolphine wiki)

Brave Prove - PS1 - 01 February 2020:

Brave Prove is an action-RPG in a similar vein as the ThoOasis series where you gather Elementals in your quest and save the world. It also features a combo system that is somewhat unique and more reminiscent of a fighting game or beat ‘em up. Give it a try, you might be surprised at how good it is.

Tear Ring Saga Series: Berwick Saga - PS2 - 19 February 2020:

Berwick Saga is a game made under the auspices of Shōzō Kaga, the man who created Fire Emblem. He left Intelligent Systems quite unceremoniously at the turn of the century and went on to found his own development studio, Tirnanog. Tirnanog only developed two games before it was acquired by Enterbrain, and they are collectively called the TearRing Saga Series. Because the games were made by Kaga and are extremely similar to FE, they are usually included among FE fansites as honorary titles. (taken from this post)

Trails from Zero - PC - 15 March 2020:

Time wise, this story happens right after Trails in the Sky, and at the same time as the Erebonian arc from Trails of Cold Steel. For the most part the game uses the same combat system, with some new additions.

Metal Max 3 - NDS - 23 June 2020:

Metal Max 3 is a nonlinear post-apocalyptic role playing game for the Nintendo DS, where you can fight inside vehicles as well as on foot. The game was released in Japan only. Think Fallout but crazier.
Finally as always please drop a thank you to people who worked on these patch, here or on their websites, it takes years of hard work, doing hacking, programming, translating, editing, and testing to bring these patches to the JRPG community, and all of it is done for free, so if you're going to use it, or hell, even if you won't, a thank you wouldn't cost you anything.
submitted by VashxShanks to JRPG [link] [comments]


2020.06.30 11:03 4MKX This copy is worth 80

This copy is worth 80. It says so on the cover. There was this girl who wanted, I heard it somewhere that someones flatmate kept driking beer all the time. I should do that too. I couldnt do that ever. I od on contemprorary references. Everyone i know from childhood cant stand me putting a fist near their stomach. I like to get remimded of the desire i once had. Its good to not have desire. I never reduced in desire. The body does not adapt to something like that. I should have stayed with pssd. I dont want to say this but i used to wipe my hands on my sisters frock after slapping her but. I had a vision that i would do things that i would do things that i would. I once. I should write this on a recent reddit thread about how it feels to be smart. I would have come off as braggish. I used to do an hour of cardio. I felt so fucking clean. My sister is making fun of me for not going away like she is going to the uk. In college the over achievers live off the underachievers. But its hard to achieve. I dont think in terms of what is hard or easy. I dont care. I wanted to live in a bathysphere. I was going to write something. Nothing was coming out. I dont have any desire. I stay free of semen. Im not used to having it as of yet. Im 21. There was this thing that i used to do where i would type all of my thoughts into my bb8250. or related has. I could have put them on twitter. I had thousands. My sister told me that the only problem i had is that i didnt have a body. But i did. I did at one. I love two songs from crywank. one and nine. from tomorrow is nearly. I wish laura marling had kept all of her six syllable titles. I only liked her when she was 17 and playing from alas i cannot swim. I wish cat power was as productive as her. There is this singer called mirah. There should have been some intense drums on tomorrow is nearly. There is this woman who is a big writer in aditya chopra and karan johar studios. They have wierd names. I could have been like her. Have you noticed hot there are no men in spirited away. Whenever my mom touched me with her palm i feel like im being raped. I have self mutilated alot. Not for the endorphins. My dad was being a huge dick to me. I used to scratch my left arm in order to make the pain physical rather than emotional. My friend named sen noticed it. Not mom sis dad or maid. I dont play alot of piano then i end up having alot of ideas about piano. They are all inthere somewhere. If i play the piano then i have different generes in one song. Different people can appreciate different aspaects of it. The whole tomorrow is nearly is good. I only liked one and nine. I learned them on the guitar. I wish i had bought Patd's first SA in 2006. I used to listed to them on my world space. I wish i had all of the sonic youth albums that came out on cassette. They would be alot better without the constant distortion. There is this banjo and guitar cover of the world has turned from the blue album. I wouldnt want to hurt you be letting you hurt me. Would it be cruel to let my eyes return to you. Crywank lyrics are a whole new world. Like the smiths and linkin park. Linkin park is alot like stravinsky. I like all the bands realted to SY except sonic youth itself. I knew how crap oasis was when i was younger. I wish i know short hand. I wish i never had a tv. I wish the charmer were better. Like there was this one called splork tgat was realy fucking high brow. It was for bids though. I have never seen an intelligent person who is also happy because no one cares about the sadness of stupid people. Every kids movie feels more adult than adult ke movies. Chapter house was a shoegaze band that released an album where the first two songs were breather and pearl. I look at pictures of cassettes on google all the time for some reason. Mirah's first blue album reminds me of the secret garden. Ive not read that book. Writing helps you feel time. If i dint have to internet then i would be compelled to do more. I wouldnt be able to explore the feelings that life has to offer from my room that im paying 350 a month for. I had to go to the band and pay my rent directly for so fucking long. I should start a band called breather pearl. I wish i was smarter. I should buy a BB8250 again. I lose alot of things. I always feel lost. That word is engraved into my mind by how much i was called that. Lost lost. Its floating there like a hallucination. I used to have hallucinations. I used to think that people are always sad. There is no reason to separate that from your happiness. Like if you have 150M USD and your taylor swift then you wont make purely happy music. There is no such thing. There is no such thing as low-brow art as well. I also don’t know the incentive for a girl to make 150 mil. Maybe theyll get all the dick. There was this story in the game about this guy who used to eat everyones fannies all of the time. I wish i was like him some how around when i was twelve or something. I had those horrible braces. I keep losing my plectrum just to see if it will come back to me but that guitar pick is very old and its soft nylon so i have a wider range of motion. Also its less loud. Its also yellow. I hope i find it. I hope that i can keep writing and writing and writing. People stare me down alot. I still get a boner from when i told my sister to stop it when she was singing about what a bumboo i am. Its not normal how bad i look everytime i come home from the UK. I wish i wrote endlessly. I wish it was like dictation rather than. I wish i had desire. I wish i dint rub my hands on my sisters clothes after slapping her ass very gently. Though i wanted to. Though i wanted to. There is this channel on tv called z classic. I would watch that more if people dint give me shit about it. Everything you say is so abnoxious funny sick and mean. I want to be your blowjob queen. I wish i had more of a sex drive. Before the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors. The one i had was sertraline. I stood in this bus stop for this shuttle and everyone looked gravitated towards me. I was wearing this blue shirt on top of a t shirt. I wish i was smater when i wrote. I cant believe how famous sonic youth is for how much they obscure their sounds. Its not like hearing a low bitrate version of daydream nation or goo. Green and white albums, i call them. Mirah has a white and blue album. Everything looks better when it is very very non descript. My mom’s mom is on my side. Shes like me some how. She defends me from my mom who is really fucking annoying and childish. I wish i would write down the dialogue verbatim. There is one really how looking coder in the office who is skinny and bongish and eats with her hands. She is hot. There was this puzzle about these people going across a bridge two at a time and they walk at different speeds. I very very much want to go back to learning blue j again. I loved Lolita. The origin of species. I see alot of stupid vloggers and it is stupid but i got this idea that one should have alot more motion in their frames. Putting a mirrow behind someone being interviewed is good. Its also good to have traffic or a crowd. Carbon based is better than otherwise. Or carbon based based. Or a floru of people. Whats the word for the human version of traffic. There is this video of this emo guy busking. His name is Cameron sanderson. There is this girl names Elizabeth grace who also has an amazing emo voice. That is a very redundant name. John means grace by god also. I was watching this documentary by this guy called desmond morris. It said that the point of baptism is that birthing is very very gross and we have to have a proper birth two days after the real birth. Maybe its related to marginalization of women and girls. There was this church in Italy or somewhere that only allows women in a certain area after they have stopped menstruating or before they have started. I am not sure. Its called menopause and menarche. I prolly look like a very fucking stupid hoires ron when i come here in the mew of this particular hot looking honey that. I should do more cardio. One hour instead of half an hour. I wish books were more interesting. I can usually read one para and tell is a story is gona be interesting. I don’t know how people are. I used to write like this. My hand was above the paper. I have to get into the writing game or else kill my self. Simplicity is the main thing in science. I really fucking hate my text. I hate everyone else’s more. I wish my mom was dead and my dad was dead. Some day i hope for a lover to kill me. Its the closest i can get to being really happy. Its the slosest i can get to being really free. Its a rain of questions on my mind. Sometime earlier this morning i was thinking how im gona be writing today. I should be in my own head and not have to deal with my made. One alka das. I think alot of people know her. If my mom and dad come back then im not going to have the sanity that i have now. I wish there were dead. No thing that has happened in my life has ever been sad. I don’t even think about myself anymore. I feel like mersault. I used to feel like albert camus. I get really fucking bored when i write. I could have all of the coffees and teas and fags. I don’t like fags as much as i used to. I used to like it alot. The second summer vacation i had in this country. I can never complain about anything. I always had music to listen to. Maybe im like an addict but i don’t regret anything. I imagine pothead say the dame thing. Or people addicted to final fantasy. I saw that in a post in a thread. Reddit is getting very blunt these days. It was better in 2013. I like the thread about people being forever alone; I read the whole thing. I don’t want to expand beyond that. I don’t get how some people’s whole life revolves around jerking off. I don’t want to write this. I want it to stay in my mind. I should have been more alone today. No good can come from interactive with people from your childhood. I wish i had a twin like in gone girl. Im reading that book. Romona Xavier and death grips have opened my sonic world again. There is this list of con in the sidebar. Death grips recommends romona in yt. I don’t know if its reversed. A days commitment seems like a burden to carry. I used to know about how to do things. I should get a gameboy instead of smoking. This is because smoking is the same thing everytime. Play games instead. Im being tremendously inspired by four chan nowadays. Chan is short for channel. I want to make a 4chan original now. I am going to go to the gym in a place called DI and then do alot of cardio and then i get very how so ill jump in the pool. There was this one girl who was a security gaurd on UoH. I dint know if she was fat of thin. There was this one girl who looked like shagun khandelwal. I wish my family never discarded any thing electronic. My moms family never had a desktop. They went straight to laptops. The date is 250415. We had an earthquake just five minutes ago infact. Ive said it before and i hate this time. That’s how i wanted to be. Soft spoken. I was going to keep punching my cousin brother. Imlistening to this bong channel on the fm. Some times ar floating around in my head. I have to accept my sonstant state of conflict. If your conflicted then you are making something.
submitted by 4MKX to u/4MKX [link] [comments]


2020.06.06 22:42 myNameIsPDT QUBT: a quantum computing middleware company with meme potential

TLDR: For those with lower attention spans, here is a rocket: 🚀. There are very few "quantum" pennies. However, one in particular -QUBT- is a promising middleware company that provides optimization based software solutions and is one of the very few companies that can write software for quantum systems. They launched their first product on April 23rd, on June 2nd it was rated as best in class and they also issued 12,991,384 additional shares (they currently have 8,084,917 outstanding).
Quantum Computing Inc, ticker symbol $QUBT, trading for ~$2.65.
Quantum computing is the next technological holy grail, and is predicted to be a trillion dollar industry virtually the day after someone finally makes a useful machine. For those unfamiliar with quantum computing, its a way of storing and processing data using the unique properties of quantum mechanics. The classic example is Schrodinger's cat, which is both living and dead at the same time. Quantum particles can achieve a state called superposition, which allows them be two things at once. That means a quantum byte of information, known as a qubit, can be both a 0 and 1 simultaneously, whereas a boring classical computing byte can be only a 0 or a 1. Therefor, if you wanted to store information in a classical system, for every piece of information you want to store you need one byte. Qubits on the other hand, because they can occupy two states at once, can store/process data exponentially. Lets say your RAM, which is around 8gb for most laptop users, or 8 billion bytes, was actually made of qubits. That would mean instead of being able to store 8 billion pieces of information you could now store 2^8000000000 pieces of information - or millions more orders of magnitude more pieces of information than atoms in the universe (there are around 10^82 atoms in the universe). Activate skynet.
While all the above numbers are truly amazing, none of this is achievable yet. Decoherence is a massive problem, qubit stability can only be achieved for a few 100 nanoseconds, most systems require near 0 kelvin (or -273F degrees, aka absolute zero) temperatures to achieve superposition, and even then once you try to determine the state of the qubit it is no longer in superposition and thus researchers are trying to leverage quantum entanglement to get around this problem. Scott Aaronson is probably the world's foremost leading expert on this topic, look up his work if you want to learn more. He did a great podcast with Lex Fridman that you might find interesting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uX5t8EivCaM
In spite of these limitations, quantum computing is here to stay. In October of 2019, Google published a paper on their achievement of quantum supremacy, which is a fancy way to say they demonstrated an instance in which a quantum computer outperformed the world's most advanced super computer. You can read the article here, free of charge: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41586-019-1666-5 . IBM took issue with this publication because while google did technically succeed, they cherry picked a task that only a shitty quantum computer with no logic qubits or decoherence could perform - which is simply generating a random sample. If the qubits are constantly interacting with their environment at random (which is the current state of quantum computing), then all google had to do was measure the randomness to generate a random sample. As you might be thinking, and IBM would agree with you, how does this demonstrate computing at all? This same task is surprisingly taxing on a normal computer, so while utterly useless to most and, questionable at best, it does technically achieve quantum supremacy. Because of this accomplishment, quantum computers have a proven use, and are here to stay.
Not only has humanity reached the great accomplishment of making a truly fast randomness machine (a little satire for you), rallying the academic communities, but governments around the world have gotten on the band wagon as well. US House of Representatives passed the National Quantum Initiative Act recently, which provides over a billion dollars in funding for quantum computing programs. Now that the gov is on board, this is definitely here to stay.
Take a moment to think about what happened after the first computers were invented - people suddenly needed monitors, keyboards, a mouse, a desk, a chair, internet service, and thousands of dollars of software - all adding up to $$$$$$$$$$. While the catalysts of quantum computing its self is likely still far away, the secondary markets for all the junk people will need is well underway. The first need is the ability to use the computer, which requires software - aka middleware.
Enter QUBT. This software company took over a beverage company back in 2018, did a reverse stock split, and has been hard at work since. Their goal is to create middleware that maximizes the efficiency of solving very difficult problems, often referred to as NP problems (known lovingly as nondeterministic polynomial time, which just means you can't solve it unless you try every answer and check... unless you can solve the infamous P=NP problem - you get a million dollars for showing your work too). NP problems are often logistical in nature from a government and business stand point. The questions usually revolve around concepts like "how to best use 1,000,000 employees" etc etc. The kinds of questions if answered correctly could boost productively and cut overhead. However, due to their nature, these problems contain hundreds of thousands of variables that all need to be modeled temporally and spatially and it quickly becomes impossible to compute. QUBT, however specializes in writing software that can do this. What is interesting about QUBT is they have written software to address NP problems using CPUs, GPUs, and early quantum systems as well. So, whatever a company's resources are, QUBT can help them make the best use of them.
It is important to note that giants like Amazon, Microsoft, and IBM provide similar services, and many would say are untouchable because of they also provide these services through their cloud platforms, and wrap these services into larger service plans, thus offering a complete package. Turns out, QUBT not only offers their middleware through a cloud platform as well, but they also do it better: https://ir.quantumcomputinginc.com/article/?article_id=2042235. QUBT sent their software to a physics lab at Cornell, which did a full assessment and determined it was a superior platform.
QUBT's biggest advantage in the future is providing the middleware necessary for people to switch from solving really hard problems on classical computing hardware to solving these same problems on quantum machines (whenever they get here). With the internet revolution profoundly burned into minds of Boomers and GenXers who were in work force in the 90s, you can bet these people who now make up the senior leadership of every major corporation and government in the world, have no intention of being burned again. The changes are happening now.
QUBT estimates they will do 100 million in business in the next year, so thats good. However, they still need capital to get off the ground and did this last week:
"The Company is filing the Registration Statement in connection with the offering from time to time, pursuant to Rule 415 promulgated under the Securities Act of 1933, as amended, by Oasis Capital, LLC (“Oasis”) of up to 12,991,384 shares of the Company’s common stock, par value $0.0001 per share (“Common Stock”), consisting of (i) 12,820,513 shares of the Company’s common stock issuable to Oasis pursuant to the terms of an Equity Purchase Agreement (the “Financing Agreement Shares”); and (ii) 170,871 shares of Common Stock previously issued to Oasis (the “Previously Issued Shares”)."
Considering they have 8 million shares outstanding, the addition of another 13 million is quite significant. However, QUBT hit a high of $4.80 the day after this was filled, and has since fallen to $2.65 as of Friday. Proportionally speaking, if we believe QUBT should dilute relative to the new shares, then this has more to fall. However, considering they were in the middle of a hefty pump, the current share price could represent the bottom.
They are getting some traction on google trends too.
https://trends.google.com/trends/explore?q=QUBT&geo=US

My assessment is one of caution when deciding what to do with QUBT. My biggest concern is its likely a matter of time before one of the big companies one-ups them and takes whatever market share they gain over the next few months or year (or buys them out which could be good). However, considering their narrative, and the irrational exuberance that can follow when people make posts like this on twitter:

https://preview.redd.it/9h7wwsrpqc351.png?width=598&format=png&auto=webp&s=5a13fef3ce596bb1afd062b7a20a9e3a5c9fd675
I don't see why this wouldn't become a meme stock in the near future. Just like you don't fight the FED, I have learned to not fight the narrative. Regardless, I am a bit scared of the timing on this one considering quantum computers have yet to make it out of the lab. However, their NP optimizing platform that can run on GPUs and CPUs seems to negate this by providing the potential to profit in the short term. This is a company that has a cool product, in a saturated market filled with absolutely monster competition, and has yet to be profitable... probability suggests their future may remain dark (although, I'm sure their NP crushing software already knows this answer).
In full disclosure, I actually wanted to write a full quantum computing investing piece, but QUBT is the only penny in this space that is worth talking about. Most of the excitement in term:s of addressing the issues I outlined in my background information is coming from bigger players that own significant stakes in private start-ups and university labs that are doing all the heavy lifting. D-wave, Google, IBM, and Intel are the players to watch closely. There is an ETF called QUTM, but their holdings are garbage. Its basically a bunch of semiconductor companies that have quantum on their page somewhere and have yet to make any progress in the space. The big players and their private investments are the ones filling all the patents and making progress.
I do want to do a formal risk assessment section. So in honor of u/Cicero1982, here it goes:
The major risk factors with QUBT is there lack of capital, and need to acquire capital in order to appropriately market and sell their new software. Considering their last offering was on the 2nd, another offering may not happen for some time. Overall the company has never turned a profit (as indicated above, they haven't had a product until April), and their total debt is $29 million. A lot of the risk associated with this company is speculating on what they will need to do with their stock to get the capital they need to move forward. I do anticipate a sizeable amount of dilution if they aren't willing to be bought out. To date, I have not seen any buyout rumors, so I expect dilution. Finally, their most recent offering netted them enough funding to last a year, but considering their expenses moving forward are going to include more than just supporting a small team of software engineers, I imagine these new funds will not last more than a couple months.
I am hoping to hear other's thoughts on this investment. Please share your criticisms and critiques, and any information I missed.

EDIT: as of Sunday morning, 6/7/2020, I have not seen an appreciable spike in chatter on twitter. Last post on $QUBT was June 5th. In spite of some during the week excitement, the FOMO and MEME factor may not play a significant role for this stock this week. However, considering how few shares are in circulation, it does not look like it would take much to spike the price. My plan is to wait until this dilutes more. I can see it sinking by another dollar as they do more offerings to get off the ground. I like the business, I like the company, I need to exercise some patience and wait. This will certainly be a buy-and-hold for me once I feel comfortable with the price. If anyone tried to make this play this week, please comment below, I would like to know your thoughts.
submitted by myNameIsPDT to pennystocks [link] [comments]


2020.06.05 03:49 blue-green_eyes The Emotional Legacy Challenge

Hey guys! This is the first challenge I’ve ever attempted to create. I’ve researched and could find only one other challenge even remotely like it and it wasn’t as difficult/detailed as mine. Be warned this does use packs and as of today I’m still play-testing it.
I was doing the Not So Berry Challenge because I liked the idea of having a theme color for my sims, and loved that having the traits, aspiration, and career picked out for me made me go out of my comfort zone and play with things I hadn’t yet. I just wished the challenge used more of my packs. So I made my own challenge. I liked the colors idea but ran with the theme of emotions, since each emotion has its own unique color.
You have your basic legacy rules, create your founder sim with no kids, lifespan normal, no cheats (I tried hard to make the goals not require any cheats like some challenges do). You can use mods, but I suggest you don’t use them to make the game easier (like MCCC turning off emotional deaths) if you want it to still be a challenge. That said since I’m still play-testing I don’t know just how challenging this might be. Especially for generations who’s “ideal mood” can result in death. I’d suggest saving your game a lot.
Obviously each generation has to have at least one offspring, but there’s no limit to how many total they’re allowed to have. You can choose which one you want to be your heir for the legacy. It’s technically not gender specific but for the generations that require you to be a single parent you’ll need to move the baby away from the mother into your household to live with you if you are a guy. The goals are somewhat chronologically ordered but you can complete them in whatever order you manage to do.
Generation One: Uncomfortable
Theme Color: Red Orange
Traits: Squeamish, Neat, Vegetarian
Aspiration: Successful Lineage Aspiration
Career: Unemployed
Goals:
Generation Two: Tense
Theme Color: Orange
Traits: Noncommittal, Jealous, Self-Absorbed
Aspiration: Serial Romantic and Renaissance Sim (allowed to switch back and forth)
Career: Part Time Jobs Only
Goals:
Generation Three: Angry
Theme Color: Red
Traits: Hot-Headed, Evil, Hates Children
Aspiration: Public Enemy then Master Vampire
Career: Criminal (Boss)
Goals:
Generation Four: Sad
Theme Color: Dark Blue
Traits: Good, Gloomy, Outgoing
Aspiration: Painter Extraordinaire
Career: Painter (Master of the Real)
Goals:
Generation Five: Dazed
Theme Color: Lilac
Traits: Erratic, Kleptomaniac, Insider
Aspiration: World Famous Celebrity
Career: Social Media (Internet Personality)
Goals:
Generation Six: Embarrassed
Theme Color: Yellow
Traits: Loner, Unflirty, Bookworm
Aspiration: Nerd Brain
Career: Engineer (Mechanical Engineer)
Goals:
Generation Seven: Bored
Theme Color: Grey
Traits: Snob, Dance Machine, Lazy
Aspiration: Fabulously Wealthy
Career: Business (Management)
Goals:
If you get this far, I suggest you keep going and try to complete Playful, Focused, Energized, Confident, Flirty, Inspired, and Happy generations and create your own rules/goals. The only dangerous one is playful, because of death by Hysterics. I started to make them part of the challenge but realized there were way too many possible options for the positive emotions. Especially with Focused and the Get to Work Careers. It’s pretty easy to make your own rules if you want to keep it going. Pick an emotion, each emotion already has an in game theme color. The remaining emotions have one emotional trait associated with them, so the sim must have that trait. There are sometimes other traits that are related that can trigger that emotion (like childish can trigger playful) so pick those as well. The rest of the traits you can choose related to the sims’ aspiration or career. Goals are typically to complete the aspiration, master the career, and live on lots/do the types of interactions that help your sim maintain their “ideal” mood.
Optional Rules/Extra Challenge: * Never the Same Thing Twice: Try picking only traits, careers, and aspirations you haven’t already used in the previous heirs. Until you run out. Then it’s a free for all. * Colorful Kids: With the positive emotions you could attempt raising two or more emotions in the same generation. Especially if you have twins or triplets. Could be pretty challenging though to finish both but could work if they’re pretty close friend and keep living together. * “I’m Fine”: I considered making a “Fine” generation with white as the theme color. However, the best way to achieve “Fine” as a mood is to have the sim “Care for self” while they’re not on the current lot. I didn’t know how to make that into an interactive challenge when it requires them being mostly absent. Also there are no traits neutral enough to fit. But if you have a spouse or non-heir offspring you’re not gonna play much you could give them the theme color of white and just have them exist at the same time as one of the other generations. * Force the Occult: I used Vampires and Ghosts in the challenge to let me have an excuse to explore those life states. Maybe you could create a playful mermaid who wants to be a friend of the animals, an energized alien intent on solving the mystery of Strangerville, an inspired spellcaster who wants to master potions and mixology. There’s limitless possibilities if you force yourself to add the extra life states in the mix.
submitted by blue-green_eyes to thesimslegacies [link] [comments]


2020.05.25 13:31 thescarlettpriest The Nameless Ones

I'm typing this as a warning to anyone who may encounter the horror that we have released into this world. The desire for discovery and glory blinded us, there are things in this world that should remain undiscovered, mysteries that should remain buried. We have unleashed one such force that will reign death on hundreds of innocents. This is my account of the "Nameless Ones".

My name is not important, I am a student of Egyptology at The University of California Berkeley. Ancient Egypt has been my passion since I was in high school. I would spend hours at the library researching every aspect of Ancient Egypt like it was my job. I knew anything from the very founding of Egypt to Caesar Augustus's conquest. This passion was enough for UC Berkeley to give me a full-ride scholarship. My intention was to become a fully-fledged Egypttolgist and archeologist. My schooling was lengthy, lots of reading a whole lot of papers and exams, I only really socialized with other students in my program, two in particular only because their passion for learning about Egypt mirrored my own.

Hailey looked the part of typical Southern California blonde bimbo but she had the mind just as bright as her looks. The other was Noah, though he was stoner through and through he was actually analytical when he was high, he was also our supplier when we had to blow off some steam. The three of us did everything together from studying to socializing.

At the beginning of our fall semester of junior year, the head of the Egyptology department at Berkely Dr. Anthony O'Neill announced that after years of trying to get approval from the University and the Egyptian government he would be taking three students to an archeology dig in Egypt to uncover a previously unknown tomb deep within the Egyptian desert. This was the opportunity of a lifetime. Even with all my passion I have never been to Egypt neither have Hailey or Noah. We knew that we had to go, at the time it was a dream come true, to take part in a new discovery with my two best friends and along with one of the top minds of Egyptology.

There were several requirements to qualify, anyone who applied for the trip needed at least a 3.5 in cumulative GPA in the Egyptology major, a letter of recommendation from another professor within our major, and we needed at least a B+ in two prerequisite courses. While the requirements would not be a problem for us, they did surprise me with their strictness. It was only a summer trip, why was it so exclusive?

Though it seemed like a hassle, Hailey, Noah, and I applied as soon as they started accepting applications. We worked our asses off to make a good impression with Dr. O'Neil and we signed up for the pre-requisite courses in spring. We excelled in the courses, each of us getting an A. Towards the end of the semester, Dr. O'Neil summoned the three of us to his office and happily told us that we were all chosen for the trip. We were ecstatic, this was everything we ever wanted, we spent the rest of the year talking about what we would do in Egypt. After finals were done Dr. O'Neil summoned us to a seminar of the dos and don'ts of the trip, what to bring etc, no weed of course but even Noah was willing to give up weed for a summer. He also talked about the location of the tomb and the history behind it. The location of the tomb was far off where the traditional burial grounds were such as Giza or the Valley of the Kings. It was in the western deserts of Egypt, the closest settlement being a small oasis town being a two and a half-hour journey away from the site.

The history of the tomb was rather chilling to say the least. According to Dr. O'Neil, it dates back to the early middle kingdom. It is only referenced a few times in scrolls he found in the tombs of Pharaoh Amenemhat II and the writings of his high priest. According to writing accounts, the tomb was not for one individual but for several, the literal name for this tomb was "The Eternal Death". There is no mention of who was put in this tomb but he did know why. Apparently the individuals were accused of crimes against the gods and were described as "Those who Amun hates". What was done to them was not known. For most of his career, Dr. O'Neil thought this was a mere legend, but recently a large sandstorm in the area revealed a portion of a structure and he thinks that this could potentially be "The Eternal Death" site.

In all my years of research, I have never heard of the "Eternal Death". True the majority of Egyptian ruins are still buried beneath the sands, but I feel like this place would have been mentioned more than a few times. Also, such punishments were a little excessive in my opinion. If we were talking about run of the mill blasphemy these individuals would have been simply executed or imprisoned by the Pharaoh. But why were they sent to this place so far from Egyptian civilization and why dedicate an entire structure to their imprisonment? It was a real head-scratcher.

After the seminar concluded, Hailey, Noah, and I went for sushi in downtown Berkely to celebrate before we went home to get ready for the trip. As we ate I brought up my questions and concerns, Noah told me that the whole thing is "dope and spooky as hell" Hailey tried to ease my concerns saying that we could uncover an unknown religious practice of ancient Egypt and learn more about the religion as a whole. I agreed with her, I put all my concerns to rest and just focused on celebrating. I was going to Egypt with my two best friends and we are going to contribute to making the discovery of a lifetime. The next day the three of us went home to spend two weeks with our families before departing.

My parents were so excited for me to go and went on a shopping spree to ensure I had everything I needed. When the day of the trip arrived my parents dropped me off at San Francisco International where I met with Hailey, Noah, and Dr. O'Neil. We said our goodbyes and got on the flight to Cairo. The flight was grueling, taking a full day and one layover to get there. But when landed, it was a relief, we finally made it to Egypt.

Before we proceeded to the dig site, Dr. O'Neil would take us to some tourism venues to have a bit of fun before we started working with him. We hit all the typical tourist traps in Egypt, the Pyramids, the Sphinx, the Egyptian Museum, etc. Dr. O'Neil took us out to dinner every night. We found out he was really cool, even though he had a demanding exterior he knew how to have fun and he told us all of his stories of previous digs he took part in as well as one story where he dissected a mummy. After about a week of sightseeing, all the arrangements were made to embark on the dig site of the "Eternal Death". We got up really early to get on a small plane to the oasis town. After landing we drove two and a half hours to the site where the excavation was already underway. Tents were erected all over the place with a large one in the center. The heat was murder, all the ice water, and sunscreen in the world could not help.

But aside from that, I was excited to get to work. We were given tasks to analyze artifacts that were dug up, along with cataloging and photographing the artifacts and also with estimating where the entrance to the tomb was located. We were happier than kids on Christmas taking up the cataloging of artifacts with sheer enthusiasm. Every night we came together to debrief and discuss findings that were brought to us by the excavation team. One peculiarity I noticed was that there were a lot of weaponry pieces and shield fragments scattered throughout the site. I came up with the suggestion that there was a battle or heavy military presence.

I couldn't find a reason why the Pharaoh would have such a large military presence here. It seemed like a waste of resources and too far from Egypt's population centers. If this place was just a tomb there was a lot of effort to keep it secured, not even the greatest pharaohs had living armies guarding their tombs. Noah had something to share as well, he found that the exterior of the pillars surrounding the structure was not made from traditional sandstone, but something else. The material was some oily black stone resembling obsidian. It had to have been used for some kind of ritualistic purpose but we didn't know what it was or where it came from. The next day, Hailey burst into my work station telling me that they found a statue. I immediately dropped what I was doing and followed her.

The statue was buried up to the waist. The full height was at least twenty feet tall, the statue was an Anubis guard meant to protect tombs from evil. But I noticed something odd about this statue, not only was it made from an obsidian-like substance, but it was facing towards the tomb not away from it. Normally an Anubis guard would face potential threats. Over the course of the day, we uncovered more Anubis guard statues all facing towards the tomb. I was very unnerved by this development, this tomb wasn't made to keep people out, it was made to keep something in.

That night Dr. O'Neil was excited about the uncovering of the Anubis statues but he was dismayed that we hadn't found the tomb's entrance yet. Hailey then came up with the suggestion that if the Anubis guards were facing potential dangers within the tomb perhaps if we traced where the statues were facing, it might lead us to the entrance. It was a good idea but it would have to wait until the next morning. The next day we traced the spot each Annubis statue was facing and pinpointed to one spot in the sand, we then pointed the excavation team towards the spot and they started digging. After about three hours we found the entrance. Dr. O'Neil was so excited, Noah and Hailey hugged and started dancing. The only one who wasn't celebrating was me, I should have been happy, I should have been dancing with my friends but all I felt was fear as if something was watching me from the tomb entrance.

The tomb's entrance seemed to glare at me. It was a large door made from the same oily black substance the same as the pillars and the Anubis statutes. I just stared at it, not with fascination but with unease. It was like watching a predator from a distance like I knew it could hurt me but I couldn't help but stare at it. Noah clapped me on the shoulder snapping me out of my trance, and asked "why the long face?" I shook my head and put on a smile and gave Noah a hug. We then joined Dr. O'Neil and Hailey opening a bottle of champagne. I shook off my bad feeling and took part in celebrating indulging in a few glasses of champagne. We spent the rest of the day logging and photographing every aspect of the tomb entrance. We removed any excess sand covering it and got to cataloging all its features.

On the surface of the entrance there was a series of hieroglyphics. I tried my best to translate, but reading Ancient Egyptian was never my strong suit. It took some help from Hailey and Dr. O'Neil but we managed to get it. If this place unnerved me before now this really took the cake, the message read "Those who take up arms against Amun will be eternally bound to flesh and will be stripped of paradise or damnation and will become nameless".

In Ancient Egypt, preparing for the afterlife was one of the most important parts of living and your name has power and is the core of your existence and humanity, by being stripped of your name you would be a hollow shell. "Being bound to the flesh" is a fate worse than death itself, the inability to move on to the afterlife either paradise or damnation. Why keep people away from damnation? If these people were blasphemers then damnation would have been their punishment. Their crime must be so severe that not even hell itself would want them.

It was starting to get dark so Dr. O'Neil and the three of us debriefed in his tent before going to bed. He told us that we would start exploring the tomb first thing in the morning. I brought up my questions about the inscription on the door, he rubbed the back of his head and said that he didn't know that this was completely new territory for him. After the rest of the debriefing, Hailey, Noah, and I sat around a fire before going to bed. For the first time I opened up to them about my unease and that there was something just not right about this place. They understood my concern, Noah told me that it's common for archaeologists to get that feeling especially when dealing with locations with a grim past. Hailey said that she also had a bad feeling about this place saying that she felt like she was trespassing. Their reassurance was helpful and I went back to being excited again. I was going to explore a real-life undiscovered Egyptian tomb. My childhood dream was about to come true. Little did I know.

The next morning we got up at the crack of dawn and joined Dr. O'Neil at the tomb entrance where the excavation team was trying to get the door open. Though progress was being made, it was taking a long time. "Whoever is in there sure as hell wasn't getting out" Hailey joked, Noah and I laughed nervously. After about three or four hours of grueling work, they managed to get the door finally broken open. Dr. O'Neil stood at the entrance and shined a flashlight inside. It was a long dark hallway, we were unable to see the end. Before we all entered we filled up our water bottles and put new batteries in our headlights. After we were done preparing, we entered the hallway with Dr. O'Neil leading the way.

Upon entering we were met with a strong musty smell. I mean nobody had been there for at least 3000 years so that was expected. As we walked down the hallway, my feeling of unease was through the roof but I kept it to myself so as to not ruin the moment. The darkness in the hallway was very oppressive as if it was consuming us even with our headlamps. Dr. O'Neil then told us there was a chamber straight ahead. It was a relief to get out of the hallway, but the room was filled with the same musty stench. This time it smelled like what I could I only describe as death and suffering. Hailey and Noah smelled it as we all covered our mouths. Dr. O'Neil was the only one who didn't seem to bother, he just chuckled at our reactions "I had the same reaction when I was your age, you get used to it". We tolerated it eventually and just ignored it.

At first glance, the room seemed to be some kind of place of worship with hieroglyphics all over the walls. But as we looked around, we saw that the room was littered with equipment meant to prepare corpses for mummification. In the center of the room was a stone slab with four chains, presumably to tie down the wrists and ankles. I shuddered at the thought of being chained to it. My first thought was human sacrifice, but as far as I knew, the Ancient Egyptians didn't take part in human sacrifice so this whole setup was extremely out of character for any religious ceremony I was aware of. I asked Dr. O'Neil about the hieroglyphics on the walls and he told me that this was some sort of chamber where those who were sentenced to the "Eternal Death" were bound to the flesh and stripped of their names and doomed to remain on earth until the end of time. I looked around the chamber again, it was more like an ancient torture chamber rather than a place to conduct religious rituals.

We then heard the sound stone cracking and a crash, we jumped and turned towards the sound, it was just Noah. He stepped on a loose tile, his leg almost falling through. He got up and dusted himself off "guess we found our first booby trap" he joked. He looked down at the tile and furrowed his brow. "Hey there's something stored here" we all walked over and sure enough there was a collection of scrolls gathered in this hole. With the utmost care, we picked them up, placed them on the stone slab, and carefully started to read them over.

Each of us picked one and went on to translate them. As I said, I was never the best at deciphering hieroglyphics, It took me about ten minutes to decipher one word. I looked over at Dr. O'Neil, I saw that he began to get more and more unsettled, the color draining from his face, he actually looked sickened. "Oh God almighty," he said while rubbing his eyes. Hailey asked him what his scroll said. He described the horrible ritual that was performed on the people who were buried in that place. The first step was to chain the subject to the table and several spells were performed to strip them of their identity by removing their eyes and tongue so that they could not look upon the afterlife or speak their name forever binding their soul to their corpse after that, they were then mummified alive.

I have memorized the entire mummification process and imagining being alive and conscious through it made me nauseous. They would have had to remove their vital organs and remove their brain with a red hot poker up the nose. I then looked up at all the mummification stations and equipment. Imagining each one being occupied by a person and the chamber being filled with the screams of the dying unable to speak or see only being able to scream in agony. I started gagging eventually throwing up my breakfast "that's disgusting" I said while wiping the bile from my mouth. Hailey didn't look so good either, her hands over her mouth looking like she was on the verge of tears. "Who would deserve something so horrible"? she asked.

Noah answered that question looking up from the scroll he was reading. According to Noah this ritual was performed for the first time and only once, on a group known as the cult of Apophis. For those who don't know, Apophis is a giant cosmic serpent, the very embodiment of chaos itself. It was its fate to forever try and eat the sun god Ra and bring about the end of times. Each Egyptian god had its own cult whose task was to prayer and honor their patron god or goddess to give them the strength to perform their duty in the universe.

I had never heard of the cult of Apophis, but the Pharaoh and high priests would definitely see this group as a threat and would be deemed as the enemies of the gods. Seeing them as enablers of destruction and chaos. I could see why they would be hated and condemned by Amun. Noah also found that the reason they were barred from the afterlife. The cult believed that when they died and reached the afterlife they would join Apophis and help him to bring about the end of time. I was at the end of my rope. I didn't want to continue, I needed a break. I got up on my feet and started pacing. Hailey and Noah had the same idea and wanted to leave the tomb and come back the next day. Dr. O'Neil was inclined to agree but then noticed another doorway to another hallway.

He insisted that we see what was at the end of this hallway and then we could leave as it was only an hour until sunset. Reluctantly we indulged and followed him as he brought the scroll he was still reading previously. This hallway seemed longer and darker, our headlamps barely being enough to light the way. The musty smell only increased until the point where we all put bandanas over our faces. Even to the point where Dr. O'Neil began to wrinkle his nose. After what seemed like an eternity, the hallway finally opened up to another large chamber. This one was even larger than the ritual chamber, on the floor were rows of sarcophaguses, numbering at least 500 or 600. "This must be the cult of Apophis" I said.

Dr. O'Neil crouched down to the closest sarcophagus and examined it. We crouched down and examined it with him taking several photos and looking at the features. where the name should have been there was only a slash and where the prayers for the afterlife usually were inscribed were smashed off. This essentially condemned those inside the sarcophagus acting more like a prison than a form of protection. Dr. O'Neil then told us to help him lift open the lid, we looked at each other and hesitated uneased enough already. Dr. O'Neil reassured us that we would leave right after he just needed to see the mummy. Once again we relented and helped him lift the lid off.

The mummy was not like any other I've seen. This one's wrappings were not tightened and its arms and legs were broken free as if it moved around and struggled which loosened the straps over time. The wrappings around the face and chest slipped off over time as well, I could see its rotted face was contorted in a permanent scream. I looked at the lid we just removed asking Hailey, Noah to help me turn it over. After turning it over we gasped and recoiled, there were clearly fingernail marks scratched into the wood. This mummy was still alive when he was buried. But that wasn't possible, he would have had his vital organs and brain removed by the time he was put in the sarcophagus he shouldn't have been alive at all. I was at a complete loss for words, I frantically tried to come up with a logical explanation but I was drawing a blank. Hailey started hyperventilating and Noah looked away and started pacing.

I looked at Dr. O'Neil and told him very sternly that it was time to go and that we should come back the next day with more people and equipment. He got up and nodded as if he knew I said something but just didn't acknowledge it. He pulled out the scroll he was carrying and looked at and back at the mummy. He looked back at the scroll, he squinted his eyes at a spot at the bottom of the page. He then uttered several sentences in Ancient Egyptian that I won't even dare to translate. Immediately after, the musty smell of death and suffering suddenly became overwhelming until the point where the four of us started to gag barely being able to breathe. Then I heard a sound that I will never ever forget, the mummy screamed.

It was an inhuman unholy sound of pure suffering and pain. I then heard the same scream coming from all the other sarcophaguses but they were muffled by the lids. The mummy we just examined began to flail in its sarcophagus eventually spilling out of it and getting up. Hailey screamed in pure terror and Noah backed away "WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT!?" he shouted. Dr. O'Neil stood there frozen looking at the other screaming sarcophaguses and back at the mummy. The mummy looked at Hailey and rushed at her, instinctively I shoved the mummy hard from the side, it crumpled to the ground and continued to flail and scream. I grabbed Dr. O'Neil by the collar and shouted in his face "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!?"

He answered in some jumbled speech stuttering "I..I...don't know". We were interrupted by the sound of splintering wood and the screams of the other mummies increasing in volume. The others were starting to emerge out of their sarcophaguses like insects hatching from a cocoon. The ones that emerged began running towards us followed by others just beginning to emerge. "RUN"!!!! Hailey shouted. She didn't have to say it twice. We bolted for the entrance darting down the hallway, the screams of the mummies directly behind us. The hallway seemed even darker and longer but I couldn't tell, my adrenaline was pushing me to the max. Each scream uttered by the hoard behind us making me run even faster.

We managed to reach the ritual chamber, I then heard a crashing noise behind me. I looked behind me and saw Dr. O'Neil was on the ground after tripping and crashing into one of the mummification stations, he was frantically trying to get up but losing balance. I moved toward him to try and help him but then the hoard of mummies emerged from the hallway and fell upon him. I'll never forget his screams of terror; I saw one of the mummies reach into his mouth, I knew exactly what was about to happen. I turned away and continued to run; I then heard Dr. O'Neil scream, but it was a scream without a tongue. I followed Noah and Hailey down the hallway towards the entrance screams of the hoard of mummies coming closer. By some miracle, we made it to the entrance and we emerged screaming for our lives, the sun was setting when we emerged.

The excavation crew looked at us with concern. We tried to warn them but our broken Arabic was useless and we were completely hysterical. We then heard the screams of the hoard and we began to run again. Behind us we heard the terrified screams of the excavation crew along with the screams of the mummies. We ran between rows of tents avoiding the other panicked excavation members. I saw one man hopelessly wandering the camp without eyes or tongue and blood all over his face.

As we ran aimlessly through the camp. I collided with a mummy. I put my hand on its chest keeping it arm's length away from me. Its face was rotted and decayed, its breath was the same as the musty smell of the tomb. It flailed at me trying to claw at my face screaming the entire time my arm began to give way and I started to panic and let the mummy get closer. Noah then hit it over the head with a nearby shovel. The mummy turned its attention towards him and rushed him. It slashed his cheek leaving four bleeding gashes. He hit again harder this time and it crumpled to the ground still trying to get up. We had to leave immediately.

I told them that we had to get to Dr.O'Neil's tent and get the keys to one of the jeeps. We rushed through the camp avoiding burning tents and screaming workers and mummies. We made it to the tent and thank God we found the keys. We ran like hell to the jeeps luckily we all made it. At first, I had trouble getting the key into the ignition due to my shaking hand, and Noah and Hailey yelling at me to start the car.

Just then two mummies came up the windows and began banging on the glass. I looked at the one on the driver's side, it then stopped banging the window. I then noticed that this mummy had eyes, human eyes, Dr. O'Neill's eyes. It then spoke, it spoke in ancient Egyptian but it was in Dr. O'Neill's voice. I was able to understand what it was saying and it asked "why can't I die"? What snapped me out of my trance was the sound of cracking glass on the passenger side. I shoved the key into the ignition and managed to get it started.

I drove into the desert with no idea where I was going. I looked in the rearview mirror and watched the camp burning along with some of the mummies trying to give chase. I imagined more bleeding men walking around with no tongues and eyes. After the camp was out of sight and some more driving the adrenaline began to wear off. I stopped the car and just started taking deep breaths. Hailey started wailing and Noah passed out in the back seat, bleeding all over the place. I just stared into the cold desert night unable to comprehend what I just saw.

I thought this world made sense that everything could be explained. But this didn't make any sense it was not even within the realm of reason. I laid my head on the steering wheel and screamed along with tears rolling down my face. After crying for about ten minutes I pulled out the map and compass and we barely managed to make it back to the oasis town. We were in hysterics barely being able to talk or walk properly, constantly collapsing to the ground. The locals didn't know what we're saying due to our broken Arabic. A local man let us stay in his house while he arranged a flight back to Cairo.

We landed in Cairo where we were promptly interrogated by the Egyptian police. Since we were the only survivors, they wanted to know what happened to the excavation team and Dr. O'Neil. We told them everything, not holding back any details. They didn't believe us of course, the official story is that we were attacked by a group of bandits trying to rob us and that they killed Dr. O'Neil and massacred the excavation team. The police called our families and they came to take us back to the US. Hailey, Noah, and I parted ways to go home and we didn't talk to each other for the rest of the summer.

I suffered from horrible night terrors for weeks on end, always hearing Dr. O'Neil's screams, seeing the man without his eyes and tongue seeing the mummy that almost got to me and on the worst nights seeing the mummy with Dr. O'Neill's eyes. I just sat on my parents' couch and just stared, numb to the world around me. One day, my dad tried to watch the Universal Studios Mummy movie to cheer me up because it was always my favorite. But this time I started to scream and cry at the first sight of Imhotep and went into a catatonic state for hours.

Over time things got better, I was still paranoid and looking over my shoulder every now and then but I started to move on. My therapist was very helpful of course, I know she doesn't believe me but she indulged. I decided not to return to Berkeley that fall, opting to take the semester off instead. I heard Noah dropped out completely and wouldn't be returning at all. I tried texting him but he never got back to me, the last thing I heard he just stays in his room for hours and smokes weed for days on end. Hailey did return but she dropped out the Egyptology major and opted just for a history degree instead. She texted me and told me that she is doing fairly well and she is looking forward to when I come back.

At first, I was going to follow Hailey's example and drop out of the Egyptology program and pursue something else. But something changed. During my semester off I worked as a waiter at my local diner and while I was on my way to work, I heard on the radio that there was a small uptick in violence in Egypt and Libya. Reports of eight villages being slaughtered by “an unknown terrorist group”, the victims being left without eyes and tongues. I can't begin to understand these creatures, but I do know they are bound to their flesh, cursed to wander the earth for all time, they are the Nameless Ones.

I went back to my roots, spending hours at the library, scouring the Internet for any mention of the Eternal Death ritual and the Cult of Apophis. My research is coming up dry, it doesn't help that Ancient Egyptians erased any history they didn't like. I have a feeling that Dr. O'Neil knew more than he led us on. Any former students or colleagues of his, do you know anything about this? To other Egyptologists. Do you know anything about the Cult of Apophis or the Eternal Death? What does the cult want? What is the cult's purpose now that they have been released? To everyone else. Have you or someone you know encountered one of these monsters? I am trying to map out their movements, any reports of attacks or sightings are helpful. Any feedback is welcome. Please stay safe.
submitted by thescarlettpriest to nosleep [link] [comments]


2020.05.23 19:33 SwagtimusPrime Baseline protocol for dummies and why it's the holy grail of enterprise adoption

What the hell are Business-to-Business transactions?

 
Assume you're a big company that produces Product X. Product X requires raw materials A, B and C. Now where does the big company get the raw materials from? From other companies that produce them.
So we have two companies that produce raw material A, three companies that produce raw material B and four companies that produce raw material C.
Now the big company obviously needs all three materials, but there's several companies that can supply them with different prices/quality of material/volume discounts, etc. So how does the big company strike a deal with the supplier companies?
 
The existing solutions are:
 
 
As for point two, IBM's B2B solution features the following, taken from their website:
 
B2B integration platforms come with a wide variety of capabilities:
Communications adapters. Never say no to an onboarding request. Supports security-rich Internet communications protocols, including AS2, SFTP, MQ, HTTP, Connect:Direct and others.
Application integration. Includes adapters to connect to back-end systems, including databases, SAP as well as cloud object storage with AWS S3 Client Adapter.
 
Now you may be scratching your head: Aren't these features the same things that the Baseline protocol seeks to implement? Kind of, but not exactly.
There's a key difference. If you scroll down on that IBM website, you will see that in order to reap the benefits of being able to connect to different ERP systems across companies, you need to buy their B2B integration software. Generally speaking, if different companies want to connect with each other to automate their ERP workflow, there's different solutions from different software creators, but not a one-size-fits-all Baseline.
Now what does the Baseline protocol do differently from these software solutions? First off, the baseline protocol isn't software. It's a protocol. What does this mean?
 
 
So let me summarize this. The baseline protocol is software-agnostic: It can be integrated into any existing ERP-software. Companies don't have to pay for expensive subscriptions, and are able to ditch IBM's B2B solution; because now you can communicate with business partners directly through your ERP system of choice.

Security

The baseline protocol is also more secure: Existing B2B solutions send all this business data over the internet (encrypted, but still!). So if one were to hack these messages, you could find out that our big company is in dire need of Product A, has little stock of it, and needs it by a specific date. This could give competitors unfair advantages; if the needed product is scarce, a competitor could buy it before you in order to drain the supply, so you can't get any in time.

Zero-knowledge-proofs

The baseline protocol uses zero-knowledge proofs; and this happens off-chain and directly inside the ERP system, disconnected from the internet. Say you want to submit a proposal of buying X goods from a company. A zero-knowledge proof is generated, sent over the Ethereum blockchain, and then decrypted in the receiving company's ERP system. Nobody can sniff for any info about that on the blockchain; in fact, nobody will ever know that these two companies even interacted in the first place; the transaction will look like noise in the grand scheme of blockchain transactions. This makes it infinitely more secure than transacting over the internet.

Decentralization

I haven't even talked about decentralization yet. IBM's B2B solutions are centralized, so if IBM decides to not support company X or encryption standard X or whatever else, they can screw you over. You could argue that won't happen, but you can never know.
The baseline protocol is open-source, anyone can contribute, there's no central entity that can shut it down or make unilateral changes, and it's not for-profit (because it's a protocol, duh).
It leverages the ethereum public mainnet blockchain, which means nobody can tamper with the sent transactions.

Baseline in action

Using the baseline protocol, every company that uses it receives a public ethereum wallet address. That means you can easily plug your company into the "common frame of reference" which is the Baseline protocol. Any company plugged into it can see any other company plugged into it.
 
Remember my first example way above? Company produces product A, needs raw materials, but there's several suppliers for each raw material. What do?
 
With the baseline protocol, since all companies are now connected, you can send a proposal for what you need to every single company that could provide you with said material. Those companies then respond to you with their conditions: Material X costs $50 a piece, if you buy 100 it costs only $40 a piece, if you buy 500+ it only costs 30$ a piece.
 
Then you can respond to the different conditions you received from the different companies, pick the one you like most, and tell them directly through your ERP system: I like this proposal, let's do it. This gets sent to the supplier, the supplier signs it, and the contract is made and automatically integrated into both company's ERP systems. You can see this process of: Request for Proposal, Proposal, Buy order, Sales order in this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNym1HeuTxw&t=313s using the ERPs SAP and Microsoft Dynamics; into which the Baseline protocol has been integrated.

Advantages over existing Business2Business solutions

Baseline is a one-size-fits-all solution that is open-source, tamper-proof, decentralized, always-online, pay only as much as you need, subscription free, secure, cheap solution to automate business processes among companies. It lays out standards together with the Ethereum OASIS initiative. It's a common frame of reference to which companies can refer in order to sync their ERPs together.
 
It reduces friction and workflow errors while substantially speeding up Business2Business transactions, for a fraction of the cost of software solutions that require you to bind yourself to that software, hoping that others do the same. This isn't needed with Baseline.
 
This is the killer use case of enterprise blockchain; and it's built on Ethereum. It's the holy grail of enterprise adoption. It may not seem exciting, but it lays the groundwork for public blockchains to be recognized as useful. Big companies used to laugh at the idea of using public blockchains due to the fact that their business data would be exposed for everyone to see; but now, using zero-knowledge-proofs, this has changed for good.
This is every blockchain project's wet dream. And it's built on Ethereum.

EY's reputation among industry giants

This project is spearheaded by EY. EY is extremely reputable among the big companies out there. They're advising Fortune 500 companies about management, ERP, transactions, taxes, etc. They're always looking for ways on how to optimize business processes for their customers because that's literally how they make money.
 
If EY approaches their customers and tells them: You can get rid of all this bloated software and just do this one-time integration and connect to all other companies in a fast and secure way - those companies will absolutely try it. And if it works, and it does, the word will spread fast.
 
The protocol is supposed to be "finished" in the fall of this year, so we can expect to see the first companies doing a trial run of it in the next couple months.
 
I dare say the enterprise adoption race for blockchain has been decided. It's not out of the woods just yet, but Ethereum is so many miles ahead of any competition, I don't see anyone catching up now.
 
Whew. This post got a lot longer than I thought it would, but I'm not an experienced writer so forgive me. But I hope I was able to get the concept across without using a ton of buzzwords that nobody understands.
submitted by SwagtimusPrime to ethfinance [link] [comments]


2020.05.23 18:01 wolflord4 The Nameless Ones

I'm typing this as a warning to anyone who may encounter the horror that we have released into this world. The desire for discovery and glory blinded us, there are things in this world that should remain undiscovered, mysteries that should remain buried. We have unleashed one such force that will reign death on hundreds of innocents. This is my account of the "Nameless Ones".
My name is not important, I am a student of Egyptology at The University of California Berkeley. Ancient Egypt has been my passion since I was in high school. I would spend hours at the library researching every aspect of Ancient Egypt like it was my job. I knew anything from the very founding of Egypt to Caeser Augustus's conquest. This passion was enough for UC Berkely to give me a full-ride scholarship. My intention was to become a fully-fledged Egypttolgist and archeologist. My schooling was lengthy, lots of reading a whole lot of papers and exams, I only really socialized with other students in my program, two in particular only because their passion for learning about Egypt mirrored my own.
Hailey looked the part of typical Southern California blonde bimbo but she had the mind was just as bright as her looks. The other was Noah, though he was stoner through and through he was actually analytical when he was high, he was also our supplier when we had to blow off some steam. The three of us did everything together from studying to socializing.
At the beginning of our fall semester of junior year, the head of the Egyptology department at Berkely Dr. Anthony O'Neil announced that after years of trying to get approval from the University and the Egyptian government he would be taking three students to an archeology dig in Egypt to uncover a previously unknown tomb deep within the Egyptian desert. This was the opportunity of a lifetime. Even with all my passion I have never been to Egypt neither have Hailey or Noah. We knew that we had to go, at the time it was a dream come true, to take part in a new discovery with my two best friends and along with one of the top minds of Egyptology. There were several requirements to qualify, anyone who applied for the trip needed at least a 3.5 in cumulative GPA in the Egyptology major, a letter of recommendation from another professor within our major, and we needed at least a B+ in two prerequisite courses. While the requirements would not be a problem for us, they did surprise me with their strictness. It was only a summer trip, why was it so exclusive?
Though it seemed like a hassle, Hailey, Noah, and I applied as soon as they started accepting applications. We worked our asses off to make a good impression with Dr. O'Neil and we signed up for the pre-requisite courses in spring. We excelled in the courses each of us getting an A. Towards the end of the semester, Dr. O'Neil summoned the three of us to his office and happily told us that we were all chosen for the trip. We were ecstatic, this was everything we ever wanted, we spent the rest of the year talking about what we would do in Egypt. After finals were done Dr. O'Neil summoned us to a seminar of the dos and don'ts of the trip what to bring etc, no weed of course but even Noah was willing to give up weed for a summer. He also talked about the location of the tomb and the history behind it. The location of the tomb was far off where the traditional burial grounds were such as Giza or the Valley of the Kings. It was in the western deserts of Egypt, the closest settlement being a small oasis town being a 2 and a half-hour journey away from the site.
The history of the tomb was rather chilling to say the least. According to Dr. O'Neil, it dates back to the early middle kingdom. It is only referenced a few times in scrolls he found in the tombs of Pharaoh Amenemhat II and the writings of his high priest. According to writing accounts, the tomb was not for one individual but for several, the literal name for this tomb was "The Eternal Death". There is no mention of who was put in this tomb but he did know why. Apparently the individuals were accused of crimes against the gods and were described as "Those who Amun hates". What was done to them was not known. For most of his career, Dr. O'Neil thought this was a mear legend, but recently a large sandstorm in the area revealed a portion of a structure and he thinks that this could potentially be "The Eternal Death" site.
In all my years of research, I have never heard of the "Eternal Death". True the majority of Egyptian ruins are still buried beneath the sands, but I feel like this place would have been mentioned more than a few times. Also, such punishments were a little excessive in my opinion. If we were talking about run of the mill blasphemy these individuals would have been simply executed or imprisoned by the Pharaoh. But why were they sent to this place so far from Egyptian civilization and why dedicate an entire structure to their imprisonment? It was a real head-scratcher.
After the seminar concluded, Hailey, Noah, and I went for sushi in downtown Berkely to celebrate before we went home to get ready for the trip. As we ate I brought up my questions and concerns, Noah told me that the whole thing is "dope and spooky as hell" Hailey tried to ease my concerns saying that we could uncover an unknown religious practice of ancient Egypt and learn more about the religion as a whole. I agreed with her, I put all my concerns to rest and just focused on celebrating. I was going to Egypt with my two best friends and we going to contribute to making the discovery of a lifetime. The next day the three of us went home to spend two weeks with our families before departing. My parents were so excited for me to go and went on a shopping spree to ensure I had everything I needed. When the day of the trip arrived my parents dropped me off at San Francisco International where I met with Hailey, Noah, and Dr. O'Neil. We said our goodbyes and got on the flight to Cairo. The flight was grueling, taking a full day and one layover to get there. But when landed, it was a relief, we finally made it to Egypt.
Before we proceeded to the dig site, Dr. O'Neil would take us to some tourism venues to have a bit of fun before we started working with him. We hit all the typical tourist traps in Egypt, the Pyramids, the Sphinx, the Egyptian Museum, etc. Dr. O'Neil took us out to dinner every night. We found out he was really cool, even though he had a demanding exterior he knew how to have fun and he told us all of his stories of previous digs he took part in as well as one story where he dissected a mummy. After about a week of site seeing, all the arrangements were made to embark on the dig site of the "Eternal Death". We got up really early to get on a small plane to the oasis town. After landing we drove two and a half hours to the site where the excavation was already underway. Tents were erected all over the place with a large one in the center. The heat was murder, all the ice water, and sunscreen in the world could not help.
But aside from that, I was excited to get to work. We were given tasks to analyze artifacts that were dug up, along with cataloging and photographing the artifacts and also with estimating where the entrance to the tomb was located. We were happier thank kids on Christmas taking up the cataloging of artifacts with sheer enthusiasm. Every night we came together to debrief and discuss findings that were brought to us by the excavation team. One peculiarity I noticed was that there were a lot of weaponry pieces and shield fragments scattered throughout the site. I came up with the suggestion that there was a battle or heavy military presence.
I couldn't find a reason why the Pharaoh would have such a large military presence here. It seemed like a waste of resources and too far from Egypt's population centers. If this place was just a tomb there was a lot of effort to keep it secured not even the greatest pharaohs had living armies guarding their tombs. Noah had something to share as well, he found that the exterior of the pillars surrounding the structure was not made from traditional sandstone, but something else. The material was some oily black stone resembling obsidian. It had to have been used for some kind of ritualistic purpose but we didn't know what it was or where it came from. The next day, Hailey burst into my work station telling me that they found a statue. I immediately dropped what I was doing and followed her.
The statue was buried up to the waist. The full height was at least twenty feet tall, the statue was an Anubis guard meant to protect tombs from evil. But I noticed something odd about this statue, not only was it made from the obsidian like substance, but it was facing towards the tomb not away from it. Normally an Anubis guard would face potential threats. Over the course of the day, we uncovered more Anubis guard statues all facing towards the tomb. I was very unnerved by this development, this tomb wasn't made to keep people out, it was made to keep something in.
That night Dr. O'Neil was excited about the uncovering of the Anubis statues but he was dismayed that we hadn't found the tomb's entrance yet. Hailey then came up with the suggestion that if the Anubis guards were facing potential dangers within the tomb perhaps if we traced where the statues were facing, it might lead us to the entrance. It was a good idea but it would have to wait until the next morning. The next day we traced the spot each Annubis statue was facing and pinpointed to one spot in the sand, we then pointed the excavation team towards the spot and they started digging. After about three hours we found the entrance. Dr. O'Neil was so excited, Noah and Hailey hugged and started dancing. The only one who wasn't celebrating was me, I should have been happy, I should have been dancing with my friends but all I felt was fear as if something was watching me from the tomb entrance.
The tomb's entrance seemed to glare at me. It was a large door made from the same oily black substance the same as the pillars and the Anubis statutes. I just stared at it, not with fascination but with unease. It was like watching a predator from a distance like I knew it could hurt me but I couldn't help but stare at it. Noah clapped me on the shoulder snapping me out of my trance, and asked "why the long face?" I shook my head and put on a smile and gave Noah a hug. We then joined Dr. O'Neil and Hailey opening a bottle of champagne. I shook off my bad feeling and took part in celebrating indulging in a few glasses of champagne. We spent the rest of the day logging and photographing every aspect of the tomb entrance. We removed any excess sand covering it and got to cataloging all its features.
On the surface of the entrance there was a series of hieroglyphics. I tried my best to translate, but reading Ancient Egyptian was never my strong suit. It took some help from Hailey and Dr. O'Neil but we managed to get it. If this place unnerved me before now this really took the cake, the message read "Those who take up arms against Amun will be eternally bound to flesh and will be stripped of paradise or damnation and will become nameless".
In Ancient Egypt, preparing for the afterlife was one of the most important parts of living and your name has power and is the core of your existence and humanity, by being stripped of your name you would be a nothing hollow shell. "Being bound to the flesh" that is a fate worse than death itself, the inability to move on to the afterlife either paradise or damnation. Why keep people away from damnation? If these people were blasphemers then damnation would have been their punishment. Their crime must so severe that not even hell itself would want them.
It was starting to get dark so Dr. O'Neil and the three of us debriefed in his tent before going to bed. He told us that we would start exploring the tomb first thing in the morning. I brought up my questions about the inscription on the door, he rubbed the back of his head and said that he didn't know that this was completely new territory for him. After the rest of the debriefing, Hailey, Noah, and I sat around a fire before going to bed. For the first time I opened up to them about my unease and that there was something just not right about this place. They understood my concern, Noah told me that it's common for archaeologists to get that feeling especially when dealing with locations with a grim past. Hailey said that she also had a bad feeling about this place saying that she felt like she trespassing. Their reassurance was helpful and I went back to being excited again. I was going to explore a real-life undiscovered Egyptian tomb my childhood dream was about to come true. Little did I know.
The next morning we got up at the crack of dawn and joined Dr. O'Neil at the tomb entrance where the excavation team was trying to get the door open. Though progress was being made, it was taking a long time. "Whoever is in there sure as hell wasn't getting out" Hailey joked, Noah and I laughed nervously. After about three or four hours of grueling work, they managed to get the door finally broke open. Dr. O'Neil stood at the entrance and shined a flashlight inside. It was a long dark hallway, we were unable to see the end. Before we all entered we filled up our water bottles and put new batteries in our headlights. After we were done preparing, we entered the hallway with Dr. O'Niel leading the way.
Upon entering we were met with a strong musty smell. I mean nobody had been there for at least 3000 years so that was expected. As we walked down the hallway, my feeling of unease was through the roof but I kept it to myself as to not ruin the moment. The darkness in the hallway was very oppressive as if it was consuming us even with our headlamps. Dr. O'Neil then told us there was a chamber straight ahead. It was a relief to get out of the hallway, but the room was filled with the same musty stench. This time it smelled like what I could I only describe as death and suffering. Hailey and Noah smelled it as we all covered our mouths. Dr. O'Niel was the only one who didn't seem to bother he just chucked at our reactions "I had the same reaction when I was your age, you get used to it". We tolerated it eventually and just ignored it.
At first glance, the room seemed to be some kind of place of worship with hieroglyphics all over the walls. But as we looked around, we saw that the room was littered with equipment meant to prepare corpses for mummification. In the center of the room was a stone slab with four chains, presumably to tie down the wrists and ankles. I shuttered at the thought of being chained to it. My first thought was human sacrifice, but as far as I knew, the Ancient Egyptians didn't take part in human sacrifice so this whole set up was extremely out of character for any religious ceremony I was aware of. I asked Dr. O'Neil about the hieroglyphics on the walls and he told me that this was some sort of chamber where those who were sentenced to the "Eternal Death" were bound to the flesh and stripped of their names and doomed to remain on earth until the end of time. I looked around the chamber again, it was more like an ancient torture chamber rather than a place to conduct religious rituals.
We then heard the sound stone cracking and a crash, we jumped and turned towards the sound, it was just Noah. He stepped on a loose tile his leg almost falling through. He got up and dusted himself off "guess we found our first booby trap" he joked. He looked down at the tile and furrowed his brow. "Hey there's something stored here" we all walked over and sure enough there was a collection of scrolls gathered in this hole. With the utmost care, we picked them up placed them on the stone slab, and carefully started to read them over.
Each of us picked one and went on to translate them. As I said, I was never the best at deciphering hieroglyphics, It took me about ten minutes to decipher one word. I looked over at Dr. O'Neil, I saw that he began to get more and more unsettled the color draining from his face, he actually looked sickened. "Oh God all mighty," he said while rubbing his eyes. Hailey asked him what his scroll said. He described the horrible ritual that was performed on the people who were buried in that place. The first step was to chain the subject to the table and several spells were performed to strip them of their identity by removing their eyes and tongue so that they could not look upon the afterlife or speak their name forever binding their soul to their corpse after that, they were then mummified alive.
I have memorized the entire mummification process and imagining being alive and conscious through it made me nauseous. They would have had to remove their vital organs and remove their brain with a red hot poker. I then looked up at all the mummification stations and equipment. Imagining each one being occupied by a person and the chamber being filled with the screams of the dying unable to speak or see only being able to scream in again. I started gagging eventually throwing up my breakfast "that's disgusting" I said while wiping the bile from my mouth. Hailey didn't look so good either her hands over her mouth looking like she was on the verge of tears. "Who would deserve something so horrible"? she asked.
Noah answered that question looking up from the scroll he was reading. According to Noah this ritual was performed for the first time and only once, on a group known as the cult of Apophis. For those who don't know, Apophis is a giant cosmic serpent, the very embodiment of chaos itself. It was its fate to forever try and eat the sun god Ra and bring about the end of times. Each Egyptian god had its own cult whose task was to prayer and honor their patron god or goddess to give them the strength to perform their duty in the universe.
I have never heard of the cult of Apophis, but the Pharaoh and high priests would definitely see this group as a threat and would be deemed as the enemies of the gods. Seeing them as enablers of destruction and chaos. I could see why they would be hated and condemned by Amun. Noah also found that the reason they were barred from the afterlife. The cult believed that when they died and reached the afterlife they would join Apophis and help him to bring about the end of time. I was at the end of my rope I didn't want to continue, I needed a break. I got up on my feet and started pacing. Hailey and Noah had the same idea and wanted to leave the tomb and come back the next day. Dr. O'Neil was inclined to agree but then noticed another doorway to another hallway. He insisted that we see what was at the end of this hallway and then we could leave as it was only an hour until sunset. Reluctantly we indulged and followed him as he brought the scroll he was still reading previously. This hallway seemed longer and darker, our headlamps barely being enough to light the way. The musty smell only increased until the point where we all put bandanas over our faces. Even to the point where Dr. O'Neil began to wrinkle his nose.
After what seemed like an eternity, the hallway finally opened up to another large chamber. This one was even larger than the ritual chamber, on the floor were rows of sarcophaguses, numbering at least 500 or 600. "This must be the cult of Apophis" I said. Dr. O'Niel crouched down to the closest sarcophagus and examined it. We crouched down to and examined it with him taking several photos and looking at the features. where the name should have been there was only a slash and where the prayers for the afterlife usually were inscribed were smashed off. This essentially condemned inside the sarcophagus acting more like a prison than a form of protection. Dr. O'Neil then told us to help him lift open the lid, we looked at each other and hesitated uneased enough already. Dr. O'Neil reassured us that we would leave right after he just needed to see the mummy. Once again we relented and helped him lift the lid off.
The mummy was not like any other I've seen. This one's wrappings were not tightened and its arms and legs were broken free as if it moved around and struggled which loosened the straps over time. The wrappings around the face and chest slipped off over time as well, I could see its rotted face was contorted in a permanent scream. I looked at the lid we just removed asking Hailey, Noah to help me turn it over. After turning it over we gasped and recoiled, there were clearly fingernail marks scratched into the wood. This mummy was still alive when he was buried. But that wasn't possible, he would have had his vital organs and brain removed by the time he was put in the sarcophagus he shouldn't have been alive at all. I was at a complete loss for words, I frantically tried to come up with a logical explanation but I was drawing a blank. Hailey started hyperventilating and Noah looked away and started pacing.
I looked at Dr. O'Neil and told him very sternly that it was time to go and that we should come back tomorrow with more people and equipment. He got up and nodded as if he knew I said something but just didn't acknowledge it. He pulled out the scroll he was carrying and looked at and back at the mummy. He looked back at the scroll, he squinted his eyes at a spot at the bottom of the page. He then uttered several sentences in Ancient Egyptian that I won't even dare to translate. Immediately after, the smell of death and suffering suddenly became overwhelming until the point where the four of us started to gag barely being able to breathe. Then I heard a sound that I will never ever forget, the mummy screamed.
It was an inhuman unholy sound of pure suffering and pain. I then heard the same scream coming from all the other sarcophaguses but they were muffled by the lids. The mummy we just examined began to flail in its sarcophagus eventually spilling out of it and getting up. Hailey screamed in pure terror and Noah backed away "WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT" he shouted!? Dr. O'Neil stood there frozen looking at the other screaming sarcophaguses and back at the mummy. The mummy looked at Hailey and rushed at her, instinctively I shoved the mummy hard from the side, it crumpled to the ground and continued to flail and scream. I grabbed Dr. O'Neil by the collar and shouted in his face "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO"!?
He answered in some jumbled speech stuttering "I..I...dont't know". We were interrupted by the sound of splintering wood and the screams of the other mummies increasing in volume. The others were starting to emerge out of their sarcophaguses like insects hatching from a cacoon. The ones that emerged began running towards us followed by others just beginning to emerge. "RUN"!!!! Hailey shouted. She didn't have to say it twice we bolted for the entrance darting down the hallway the screams of the mummies directly behind us. The hallway seemed even darker and longer but I couldn't tell, my adrenaline was pushing me to the max. Each scream uttered by the hoard behind us making me run even faster.
We managed to reach the ritual chamber, I then heard a crashing noise behind me. I looked behind me and saw Dr. O'Neil was on the ground after tripping and crashing into one of the mummification stations, he was frantically trying to get up but losing balance. I moved toward him to try and help him but then the hoard of mummies emerged from the hallway and fell upon on him. I'll never forget his screams of terror; I saw one of the mummies reach into his mouth, I knew exactly what was about to happen. I turned away and continued to run; I then heard Dr. O'Neil scream, but it was a scream without a tongue. I followed Noah and Hailey down the hallway towards the entrance screams of the hoard of mummies coming closer. By some miracle, we made it to the entrance and we emerged screaming for our lives, the sun was setting when we emerged.
The excavation crew looked at us with concern we tried to tell them but none of us could speak Arabic and we were completely hysterical. We then heard the screams of the hoard in and we began to run again. Behind us we heard the terrified screams of the excavation crew along with the screams of the mummies. We ran between rows of tents avoiding the other panicked excavation members. I saw one man hopelessly wandering the camp without eyes or tongue and blood all over his face. As we ran aimlessly through the camp. I collided with a mummy. I put my hand on its chest keeping it arm's length away from me. Its face was rotted and decayed, its breath was the same as the musty smell of the tomb. It flailed at me trying to claw at my face screaming the entire time my arm began to give way and I started to panic and let the mummy get closer. Noah then hit it over the head with a nearby shovel. The mummy turned its attention towards him and rushed him. It slashed his cheek leaving four bleeding gashes. He hit again harder this time and it crumpled to the ground still trying to get up. We had to leave immediately.
I told them that we had to get to Dr.O'Neil's tent and get the keys to one of the jeeps. We rushed through the camp avoiding burning tents and screaming workers and mummies. We made it to the tent and thank God we found the keys. We ran like hell to the jeeps luckily we all made it. At first, I had trouble getting the key into the ignition due to my shaking hand, and Noah and Hailey yelling at me to start the car. Just then two mummies came up the windows and began banging on the glass. I looked at the one on the driver's side, it then stopped banging the window. I then noticed that this mummy had eyes, human eyes, Dr. Oneil's eyes. It then spoke, it spoke in ancient Egyptian but it was in Dr. Oneil's voice. I was able to understand what it way saying it asked "why can't I die"? What snapped me out of my trance was the sound of cracking of glass om the passenger side. I shoved the key into the ignition and managed to get it started.
I drove into the desert with no idea where I was going. I looked in the rearview mirror and watched the camp burning along with some of the mummies trying to give chase. I imagined more bleeding men walking around with no tongues and eyes. After the camp was out of sight and some more driving the adrenaline began to wear off. I stopped the car and just started taking deep breaths. Hailey started wailing and Noah passed out in the back seat, bleeding all over the place. I just stared into the cold desert night unable to comprehend what I just saw. I thought this world made sense that everything could be explained. But this didn't make any sense it was not even within the realm of reason. I laid my head on the steering wheel and screamed along with tears rolling down my face. After crying for about ten minutes I pulled out the map and compass and we barely managed to make it back to the oasis town. We were in hysterics barely being able to talk or walk properly constantly collapsing to the ground. The locals didn't know what we're saying due to our broken Arabic. A local man let us stay in his house while he arranged a flight back to Cairo.
We landed in Cairo where we promptly interrogated by the Egyptian police. Since we were the only survivors and they wanted to know what happened to the excavation team and Dr. O'Neil. We told them everything, not holding back any details. They didn't believe us of course, the official story is that we were attacked by a group of bandits trying to rob us and that they killed Dr. O'Neil and the massacred the excavation team. The police called our families and they came to take back to the US. Hailey, Noah, and I parted ways to go home and we didn't talk to each other for the rest of the summer.
I suffered from horrible night terrors for months on end, always hearing Dr. O'Neil's screams, seeing the man without his eyes and tongue seeing the mummy that almost got to me and on the worst nights seeing the mummy with Dr. O'Niels eyes. I just sat on my parents' couch and just stared, numb to the world around me. One day, my dad tried to watch the Universal Studios Mummy movie to cheer me up because it was always my favorite. But this time I started to scream and cry at the first sight of Immothep and going into a catatonic state for hours.
Over time things got better, I was still paranoid and looking over my shoulder every now and then but I started to move on. My therapist helps of course, I know she doesn't believe me but she indulges. I decided not to return to Berkely that fall, opting to take the semester off instead. I heard Noah dropped out completely and wouldn't be returning at all. I tried texting him but he never got back to me, the last thing I heard he just stays in his room for hours smoking weed for days on end. Hailey did return but she dropped out the Egyptology major and opted just for a history degree instead. She texted me and told me that she is doing fairly well and she looking forward to when I come back.
At first, I was going to follow Hailey's example and drop out of the Egyptology program and pursue something else. But something changed. During my semester off I worked as a waiter at my local diner and while I was on my way to work, I heard on the radio that there was an uptick in violence in Egypt and Libya. Reports of entire villages being slaughtered the victims being left without eyes and tongues. I can't begin to understand these things, but I do know they are bound to their flesh, cursed to wander the earth for all time, they are the Nameless Ones.
I went back to my roots, spending hours at the library, scouring the Internet for any mention of the Eternal Death ritual and the Cult of Apophis. My research is coming up dry, it doesn't help that Ancient Egyptians erased any history they didn't like. I have a feeling that Dr. O'Neil knew more that he lead us on. Any former students or colleagues of his, do you know anything about this? To other Egyptologists. Do you know anything about the Cult of Apophis or the Eternal Death? What does the cult want? What is the cult's purpose now that they have been released? To everyone else. Have you or someone you know encountered one of these monsters? I am trying to map out their movements, any reports of attacks or sightings are helpful. Any feedback is welcome. Please stay safe.
submitted by wolflord4 to SignalHorrorFiction [link] [comments]


2020.04.07 16:01 FeralWoodpecker The tale of Murky Mike

The tale of Murky Mike
So, this one's tame compared to most. No one got raped, no one got beaten, lives were not ruined and the group didn't split. But nevertheless, Murky Mike stuck with us like when you have to throw up after a night of heavy drinking and shady kebab, get a bit up your nose, fall into bed and realize now everything smells like bile puke and half digested booze. Oddly specific, you think? Weeeeellll...
We play two days, Friday and Saturday, once a month. It's two days of extreme unhealthy living, of beer farts and impromptu cooking sessions between discussions on how long cheese stays good in a fridge and whether or not you can just cut the black spots out if you need it for a sauce (Don't. Throw it out. It's not worth it.), of swearing, of crude humour, of bloody fucking triumphant epic hero moments and tragic defeats at the hands of the villains. In short, it's a guy group where, for those two days, social conventions are left at the door and the beast gets unleashed.
I say this because I want to make it clear that we are not your average high school dnd club and our tolerance for the unconventional is high and usually the only reason players get vetoed out of the group is if they are sociopaths (which we had), utter fucking morons (which, boy oh boy, we had) or plain pretentious assholes (which we had astonishingly few). So vetting a new player is more a process of answering the question of “Can this person stomach us and our humour?” than the other way around.
But first, le group: We've got guys from all the wakes of life, from left to right, from old to semi old. Outside of the batcave we're all reasonably successful and got our lives, but inside were fucking barbarian wizards. Bald GM: Former professional boxer, human grumpy cat and GM for one of our two games. Owns the place and can live on nothing but beer, raw sausages and potato chips for two straight days. Has named his haemorrhoids and claims they have teeth. Does not look good in a dress. Bearded GM: School teacher and a bit of a socially awkward penguin at times. Super smart guy who can make edible pasta out of the contents of pretty much any fridge. Literally the moral consciousness of Bald GM. Looks astonishingly good in a dress. Commie: Smart AF guy who looks like a hobo, is an extremely talented musician and works for the government in some capacity or another. I've known him for a few years now and have no clue what he does exactly. Might be a real life socialist Barney Stinson. Could pass as a woman when wearing a dress, if it weren't for the beard. Nerd: Programmer in BigTech, warhammer40k buddy of mine, banned of playing characters whose backstory is linked to mine after we ran two Viking barbarians who were childhood friends. Whatever the issue is, it is not his problem. Refuses to wear the dress. Me: Well... me. Cocky loudmouth working in the steel industry, spend my days fantasizing about murdering my forwarders and some of my customers. Most handsome and charming creature of gods green earth, obviously. Duh. Never fucked up enough to warrant being made to wear the dress. Seriously, I'm a bloody angel.
Aaand drumroll the hero of this story: Murky Mike: To my eternal shame I was the one who found and recruited Murky Mike. The Gang had decided that we wanted one more player and I was thusly tasked by majority vote to do the deed of finding some guy. I asked around my circle of friends and came up empty handed because the guys I run my warhammer games with... just wouldn't mesh well with this group and the others who I though might mesh well weren't interested in gaming in general or getting involved with another group. So, desperate to fulfil my quest, I logged onto the internet and typed in a short Group-searching-player in the local nerd website.
It took me a few days and I got the first application and swiftly tossed it because... no. Got the next one and, no. Got the next one... fuck me sideways and call me Sally, I swear to bacon if I would have had any faith in humanity left at that time, I would have lost it. I generally have a good instinct to figure out who will and will not fit in a group, which is what landed me with the job (disregarding the general laziness of the rest of my mates as a close second reason), and the guys that introduced themselves were... wow. The devils social rejects.
I had one who asked if there were any blacks or arabs in the group (which my Nerd qualifies for, at least for like 1/8 and I have no idea where Bald GM falls on the hate scale with him being from Brazil...) so yhea, bye bye sunshinesparkle. Had one who started by presenting a list of stuff he would not deal with and... yhea, no, we're not walking on eggshells for you. Had a guy who's profile pic was with cat ears and who's sexuality was furry, hard pass and who the and why the fuck do you note your sexuality in a bloody role playing portal?! Had some others who managed to utterly weird me out (and some who seemed cool but after going into detail with us doing two all nighters in a row decided that that's a bit much for them, which is fair)... And then came Mike. Mike was... to be fair my first reaction was lolnope. I cant place my finger on it but something in our short chat made me think that this was not the kind of guy I wanted to share a postal code with. Maybe it was him insisting I call him Mikey in like... the first minute. Or maybe it was his offensively exaggerated use of emojis and lols and rofls that, in tandem with the cutesy nickname, evoked the picture of a dancing manga school girl. Or maybe, as my GF at the time suggested, I was just being a fucking snob that hates meeting new people and just fucking invite the guy and see what happens so this crap can end and we can go back to watching zombie shows on netflix without me chatting with strange men all evening.
So I proceeded with recruitment. I called up Bearded GM, because Bald GM has the social grace of a frag grenade and if this was supposed to work with “Mikey", contact must be established slowly and with great care. And besides, Bearded GM has like pedagogical training or some such shit, he’ll know how to tackle that beaver.
Anyhow, days pass and I hear nothing. I reach out to Bearded GM and ask how his meeting with Mike went and he (in his social obliviousness) was like: “Oh, all's cool. Nice guy, a bit awkward, but nothing bad. Made two characters, one dark elf ninja for the evil group and one assassin for the good one.” I'm like: “An assassin in the good group? Really?” “Yhea, but like, more of an agent, you know? Like a good assassin.” Ok then, I think, whatever floats your goat.
I was expecting a trenchcoat and sunglasses wearing badass so edgy I could use him to cut my Bratwurst, but alas, what we got was So. Much. Worse. Try hard edgy I can handle. Socially inept I can handle. Alcoholic I can handle. Normal people acting like uncultured swine I can handle... but this shocked me in my naive view of the world.
First session came around where Bearded GM had written a short intro for Murky Mike to get his dark elf to a level he can join the campaign. Nerd and I were invited to a birthday party so we couldn't make it, but being chumps we had declared we'd be stopping by for a beer to go and to say hi. Bald GM greeted us at the door with the facial expression of a man who had worked for 50 hours that week and was not having a good time on his weekend. I asked him what's up and his inner woman broke through as he growled through gritted teeth ‘Nothing’. We went and immediately noticed that the atmosphere was a bit... off. First thing we noticed was that all the windows were open. This was odd, because we like our cave to be cozy and stinky, but maybe the guys wanted to give him the gentle insertion. Commie was sitting there avoiding eye contact. Bald GM had already gone through at least twenty beers, it was like... 5pm and they started at 1pm. Bearded GM was his usual good natured self: chatty, happy, enjoying GMing his game, oblivious to what was going on around him. And in the corner by the window sat Mikey. Now, imagine ALL the clichés you have heard about roleplayers distilled into one person. That's Murkey Mike. A black shirt with one of these funny nerd quotes stretched across a pair of voluptuous man-boobs, a brown-grey neckbeard spoke the tale of incantations mastered, a thick pair of classes sat on a stubby nose, covered in prints I could make out from the other side of the room and a mop of thin long hair of the same greyish coloration, bound and greased back into a poneytail like some russian pimp, was fighting and losing the battle against baldness.
Our interaction went somewhat like this.
Me: ‘Hi there, I'm Pecker, we chatted through that website.’ Murky Mike: ‘Hello.’ Me: ‘So how's it going?’ Murky Mike: ‘Fine' looks at Bearded GM, tapping his finger on the table, annoyed that his gaming was interrupted for a minute so that Bald GM could let us in ‘So what happens now?’ Me: ok fuck this guy, I sit down and grab a beer with Nerd
So we witness about twenty minutes of the saddest pen and paper game I have ever seen. Imagine getting a handjob by your GF and she gets tired half way through and tells you to take her hand and finish yourself. So awkwardly you do just that, jerking yourself off with the hand of a woman looking at you all ‘Are you done yet?’ That was approximately the amount of love and excitement in the room. Well, except Bearded GM, that lovable doofus, who was chipper AF but, judging by his worried glances towards Bald GM, had also noticed a disturbance in the force.
You may now think that I'm exaggerating in order to cram crude sexual innuendos into this story, but while I can ensure you that I enjoy crude sex humour and all it entails, I can also assure you that I'm not exaggerating. This shit was bad and Nerd and I were sitting there in profound fascination. It was like watching a train derail and flood several gardens with gajillion tons of shit. You just cant help but stop to watch the disaster unfold to the dismay of all and wonder how and why the fuck someone is transporting diarrhoea by train. Why do this? Where get so much shit? Who authorized this and who ordered it? Well, after finishing our beers Nerd and I decided that we had done our due diligence and as Mikey didn't seem interested to get to know the members of his roleplaying group we said g'day gents and legged it. Commie came after us screaming smoke break like a man dying of thirst scrambling for an oasis and even Bald GM joined, which was curious, because he doesn't smoke.
Downstairs and out of earshot of the open windows I look at my buddies and ask: ‘So how bad is it?’ Bald GM: ‘I'm not saying anything because otherwise I'm the bad guy again.’ Commie: ‘Yhea well... it's... he's not the worst we ever had.’ Me: ‘But he's bad?’ Commie: ‘Well, he smells a bit and he kinda needs to get used to our way of roleplaying...’
Well, we finish up and head out. Nerd and I discuss what we had just witnessed and that it's probably not going to work – at least that was my impression, Nerd just shrugged as nothing can phase him.
Weeks go by until the first official date. Bald GM is silent, Bearded GM and Commie are saying wait and see, give the guy a chance, maybe he's not that bad. Nerd says he's fine either way and I'm trying to get Bald GM to open up on what was so bad that made him go to his beer infused happy place, but his lips are sealed to avoid our goody two shoes to piss and moan that we're only four players and he because he scares all the people off. I get a bad feeling about this, but resign myself to veto the dude (as every accepted member has towards newbies) after I witnessed him in all his glory. Boy was that a weekend wasted...
Friday, evil group
GM: Bearded GM PCs: Bald GM: Dark Elf RangeAssassin, master of infiltration and so bloody deadly he trivialized at least three bossfights until a giant sandsquid-demonworm ate him. Rip Nate, you murderous bastard... Commie: Beastmaster, warrior, barbarian. Had a big AF wolf and a bad AF attitude. People are food, not friends. Ironically got snacked by a dragon. Nerd: alchemist and demonologist. Had dragon skin because he won a dick measuring contest with a dragon and a demon body guard because he critfailed trying to find out whether an amulet was cursed or not. Put it on yolo style, rolled and instead of getting turned into a hamster rolled for one of the best items in the game. Lucky apathetic fuck. Me: Dwarf anti-paladin. Ruthless and extremely polite. Basically a dwarf supremacist with a end justifies the means attitude and devoted to the cruel, wrathful aspects of the dwarven pantheon which blessed him as their executer on earth. Even if he's nice company, he still regards you as an unterdwarf. Dwarf Hitler Jesus basically. Murky Mike: Aristocrat dark elf ninjawarrior with a double bladed sword, haughty attitude and the eternal quest to find his family. Had heard from a dark sorceress (our boss) that there's another dark elf in the woods who can help him find them. Wants our help.
The first Murky Mike experience, the first real one, was as I arrive and Bald GM looks at me and tells me to help Mike level up his character. Ok, I grab a beer and a book, shoo Nerd who was sitting next to him away and sit down and... what is this? I frown. There's an odour in the air. A wiff of... ripeness and faecal matter that I had never witnessed in this combination before and had never known to be so... potent. I look to my right towards Murky Mike, my conscious mind not yet fully realizing the extent of the horror looming just outside of the periphery of my vision, like a character in a HP Lovecraft novel about to realize the hooker he just let into his car is fucking Nyarlathotep, mother of a thousand young, but my instinct, my animal brain, was already kicking into fight or flight mode. Then, as I turned, Murky Mike asked me something and I swear to you, it was like taking a baseball bat to the face. This was beyond disgusting, this was pure horror from beyond the fucking stars. It skipped stink and went right into physical pain. It was like this fourtysomething man had forgotten to brush his teeth and instead of a fucking ticktack chewed some roadkill that had been baking in the sun for a day and a half. 3d6 damage directly to my stomach.
Then I came to realize... this guys hair wasn’t greased back by some fancy cosmetic product... it was greased back... naturally. Hell, maybe his shirt was even white but curdled, I don't know. This grown ass man, I shit you not, had the reek of 7 days old sweat, sour milk and unwashed asscrack on him with a breath that would make fucking Nurgle blush, it was heinous. I speed walked Murky Mike through leveling up his elf and fled, telling Nerd to gtfo from my chair. My friendship with the man is strong, but Mikes odour was stronger and I would do fuck all to sit next to that person for two days. Sorry not sorry.
Anyway, the game began, the gang is making camp. We do a bit of rp, Commie the beastmaster and Bald GM the d-elf go hunting and poison plant scouting. The Nerd the alchemist preps some alchemy and spells while having polite conversation with my dwarf, actually impressing him by being fluent in dwarven. We get back together and grill our dear when... out of the woods right into the middle of our camp stumbles Murky Mikes elf who critfailed his attempt at sneaking up on us.
Weapons are drawn, questions are asked. The dark elf looks at us: ‘I am so and such of house something and I command you to lay down your weapons right now.’ My dwarf just starts laughing alongside Commies beastmaster. The alchemist just sits down again with a muttered ‘You handle this, I have potions to make' and the ranger takes aim at the other elfs head with his bow and asks if he wants to try that again. Bearded GM pulls Mike aside and explains to him that he just utterly fucked his attempt at surprising us due to the critfail. He knows we're dangerous, armed and in service of a pretty mean bitch and he needs our elf to help him find his family. Maybe a bit more diplomacy would be in order?
Murky Mike: draws his sword ‘I AM LORD SO AND SUCH FROM HOUSE WHATEVERTHRFUCK AND I DEMAND YOU LAY DOWN YOUR WEAPONS AT ONCE.’
Now, under normal circumstances, that would have been the end of his Friday. We stay in character, we make decisions as in character and pvp, although discouraged for the sake of ones survival, is not expressly forbidden. However, even often playing vastly different characters and bitching at each other, we actually never crossed blades in any of our groups. Bald GM sighs and explains out of character, which he hardly ever does, what would be obvious to anyone: he may be elven aristocracy, but he has no way to prove this and even if he had, three out of four characters are no dark elves and have never even heard of his house and his character isn't beholden to it either. Murky Mike retorts that his elf is arrogant and elitist and he expects to be shown the respect he deserves, especially from the lesser races. I point out that at this distance, even the dwarf gets him in one round and considering that he's armed to the teeth with magic weapons aswell as being a dedicated warrior in full armour, shield and mace, can and will bash his head in with zero qualms or effort. It's really not a smart way to approach a group of strangers in the woods.
Bearded GM calls a pause – an hour into the game – and sends us smoking while he talks to Mike alone.
This was the quality of roleplay Murky Mike offered. We somehow shoehorned him into the group and went on to do our quest to kill a dragon and thus gain lordship of some orks serving him. During this Mike would, in character, constantly belittle Nerds alchemist – a frail looking old asian man who would only smile at those antics as he was easily the most powerful of us – and Commies beastmaster who had been badly wounded in a fight in which Mikes own character had contributed shit all – no problem usually, dice fall as they fall, but don't act like your fucking legolas when you spend half a fight trying to pick up your weapon and lying on the ground. He didn't touch the elf and dwarf after I had done the math for him on how long he'd last in a fight, so mercifully my interactions were limited to a minimum.
Also we quickly learned to our eternal anguish that two weeks ago during their intro session Murky Mike had apparently had his monthly shower day as today not even opening all the windows managed to get his eye watering stink out. After an hour or two the entire room reeked of sweaty asscrack and roadkill breath and even Nerd and Bald GM, who can't smell for shit because one has a nose that had been broken so many times during his career that it simply didn't work anymore and the other has a perpetual cold, started to look unhappy with the rooms scent.
Other highlights were Murky Mike discovering that the “elf in the woods that can help finding his family" was -imagine my shock at that reveal- Bald GMs elf ranger! Holy cowballs, who could have expected this?!
This prompted Mike to reconsider his stance of blindly tagging along with a group of strangers to dealing with his personal quest. Also, he somehow took “can help to find" for “knows precisely where they are" – causing him to constantly sidle over to poor tortured Bald GM to demand he tell him where his family is. Thank fuck Bearded GM didn't tell him a dwarf could help him, though I might just have told him I'm not the dwarf he's looking for. This calumniated in Murky Mike eventually putting the foot down, declaring he had no interest in slaying a dragon and would not help us unless we immediately gave him something that brought him closer to his family. The group unanimously said ok and continued walking.
Thus ended the first evening with Murky Mike as it was twelve and he was tired anyway. After he left Bearded GM had a literal breakdown as he could not fathom how he should have given this wreck of an elf anymore motivation to join the fucking dragon hunt. I voted to tell him not to show up the next day, but Bearded GM and Commie, those bleeding fucking hearts, thought that would be mean. I shortly considered sucking the snot out of Nerds nose in hopes to also get his sinus clogging cold but ultimately decided that would be at least on par in vileness to Mikes body odour and the chances of success were to small to try nonetheless.
Saturday, the good group
Gm: Bald GM PCs: Bearded GM: A human rogue fighting with two magic daggers. He's like your typical hero, wisecrackin’ bad guy stabbin' chaotic good fighter. Commie: A black warrior from the worlds equivalent of central africa. Goes into battle against dragons, demons and stone golems with nothing but his manly abs and tattoos and then fucking kills them with a spear. Nerd: An archer ranger that kinda remained underdeveloped because Nerd is a really quiet guy. Me: An elven sorceress and probably the most friendly, genuinly good character I ever made. Occasionally wanders off to study architecture and has to be saved from spiders. The small ones. Murky Mike: I have no idea. Some sort of human assassin agent thing? It was... wild.
So, after airing the place out for half a day and night we reconvened, praying to the gods that this cosmic horror would not return. But, of course it did. In all its ripeness.
Now, you might expect that a grown man would have caught on to the subtle hints of people ripping open windows and looking away in disgust, but Mike obviously was above such petty observations and showed up cloaked in the same filth he wore the day before. Not sure if he changed shirts, don't think so.
Anyway, that day we were playing our good guy group exploring ancient dwarven ruins. The dwarves had dug to deep and found the prison of an almost god like ancient horror, a witch like spider demon woman that commanded fate itself. It had been a showdown Bald GM had been building towards for four years and as such we were all on edge what awaited us down there in the dark. None of us expected Young Lesly Nielson from The Naked Gun.
I'll spare covering the general unpleasantness of being in the same house as Mike as I think you get the picture. On a plus side, our cost for food was virtually nonexistent because, well, he killed the appetite. This day however, as yesterdays super assholeish idiot elf didn't fly, he opted to strike the super assholeish from his character sheet and replaced the elf with a human. It's really hard to put into words, the only thing I can think of is a bastard lovechild of Frank Derbin and Austin Powers showing up in the Mines of Moria and joining the Fellowship of the Ring.
Anticipating the worst (and having a female elf as a character) I went into super hostile mode, making it clear that whatever the fuck that abomination we had found hiding in an ancient library was not trusted by her (pretty sure Bald GM had something prepped but just threw it out after the previous day as he was literally just standing behind a bookshelf). I would not be target of the awkward flirtations of Shreks weird cousin who got banned from the swamp. Murky Mike had thus decided that, as dark and edgy didn't work, he would play his assassin as some sort of suicidal joke character, constantly cracking quips that made you cry almost as much as when he lifted his arms. Bald GM was fuming.
Now, Bald GM is a difficult guy. I had bitter fights with him, but we spoke our parts, had a beer and all was good. So did Bearded GM, Commie and Nerd and probably every person he knows. But underneath this front of misanthropy and fury caused by having led a really rough life actually lies a guy you can rely on 100% and trust blindly and he's super passionate about the few hobbies he has as they are probably the only thing keeping him from going on a violent murder spree. But hell, the love for detail and complexity he can craft is astonishing. While Bearded GM is hands down my favourite GM when it comes to his style, Bald GM takes the cake with ease in characters, worldbuilding and story. The more infuriating it was to see Murky Mike shit all over the guys hard work like a toddler with explosive diarrhoea. He levelled everything except his weapon skills and thus was useless in every fight and useless in everything else because knowing how to find a tavern on a roll of min 2 with a d20 is not a skill needed when running from a bloody Balrog.
Highlights: We fight an evil dwarven cult, outnumbered 3 to 1. Murky Mike: ‘I stand in front of the archer and sorceress, I'm useless anyway.’ Nerd and me: ‘We can't shoot, right?’ Bald GM: shruggs and shakes his head
We arrive at the tower -a giant tower in an underground cavern with its own alien biosphere caused and sustained by the being trapped inside- and wonder if we can just walk up those old, mossy stairs or if there are traps. Murky Mike: ‘I charge up the stairs full sprint, I'm useless anyway!’ Does so, fails his Dex (because, understandably, Bald GM wanted him to die and the shitshow to end without him being the bad guy to the bleeding hearts) and falls back down. ‘No traps,’ he informs the group of highly seasoned warriors. Thanks bro, great character moment...
Final battle, we are fooled and the ancient evil awakens. We have half an hour to act while this chick slowly comes to, but nothing we do seems to hurt her. One of our long time npc companions, a mighty elf warrior who had foreseen that he will not leave these ruins alive, brother to our other two rather beloved npc companions, tells us that this is it. This is the moment he saw in his vision. Run, you fools! He pulls out his sword and walks towards the ancient creature, to his death. Commies african tribe warrior raises his spear, one final greeting to his brother in arms before he brings the rest of us to safety. ‘Uragh!’ he shouts, primal and savage. ‘Bless you!’ Murky Mike says and laughs at his comedic brilliance. Bald GM -who can probably kill a man with his bear hands- looks at the guy and probably tries to remember where stashed his gloves.
And so on until, finally, Bald GM gets Murky Mike, knocks him out, and the neckbeard immediately packs his stuff, tells us how much fun he had, and leaves. We basically packed up shortly after, febreezed the ever loving shit out of the room, hallway, bathroom, everything, until we finally had reached a level of air saturation where the sweet smell of chemical disinfectant and cleaner drowned out the reek of death, misery and freshly shat diarrhoea. Then we sat there in silence, had a beer and Commie and Bearded GM, those fucking bleeding hearts, started with: ‘Well, he's a shithead and he stinks, but he didn't hit anyone with a sword or -as far as we know- collects his pubes in jars...’ Nerd was like ‘I don't care, I just ignored him...’ (I swear, this fucker is so zen he could out-chill a buddhist monk)
I was a bit baffled by Commie and Bearded GM really sitting there and trying to make up an excuse not to boot Murky Mike, all the while Bald GM only repeated that he's not saying anything otherwise he's the bad guy again. I argued against that, pointing out the myriad of offences to even our extremely low standards, the general assholeishness of him and so on, but no matter what I said, I only got a ‘Well maybe it'll get better, let’s give him another chance, I can talk to him...’ So, seeing where this was going, I did something I actually hate and forced my will, finished my beer and told them that if Murky Mike came back, I wouldn't and that's that. Bald GM ditto’ed that and the case was, thankfully, closed.
Moral of this story: Have standards and don't compromise them. No P&P is better than bad P&P.
Thus ends the tale of Murky Mike.. hmm, this was oddly cathartic. To this day, in all of my thirty years on this dirt ball, I have never encountered anyone (or anything) so completely repulsive as That Guy.
I hope my tale of misery amused you. :)
submitted by FeralWoodpecker to rpghorrorstories [link] [comments]


2020.03.26 18:27 SubaruToyotaFan1986 Memories of April 2000?

I thought we need a break from the news, so why don't we look back on some positive things?
April's a few days away, so that's why I've chosen this date.
I've decided to turn the clock back to April 2000, 20 years ago.
My memories:
What's your memories of April 2000, good or bad? Any funny ones?
I'm interested to hear your memories.
This is on here rather than /casualuk since it's in a grey area content-wise, not quite light enough for there, but not serious enough for /unitedkingdom .
submitted by SubaruToyotaFan1986 to AskUK [link] [comments]


2020.02.23 22:27 utsukishi [US-TX][H] artisan bundle (CYSM, JAK) & more (artkey, booper!, AK) [W] booper! date night sculpts, artkey sirius, paypal

timestamp upgraded a bit
hello, i am scouring the internet for the new booper! sale, they are my top priority right now. i also have a few artisans for sale, i'd like to find them a better home so that i have more room in my box now, for further inquiries, my discord handle is: shmunk#0243

maker & sculpt what i want
booper! turquoise kosmo hard trades for date night sculpts
alphakeycaps grookey keypora trades
artkey medieval oasis queen trades
CYSM stupid dog booo trades or 120 shipped
JAK frozen blueberry noodle (glamour) 50 shipped or 90 bundled with banana for scale
JAK banana for scale noodle 50 shipped or 90 bundled with blueberry
CYSM monochrome grey keyby trades or 120 shipped
SUK spectre keybuto 50 shipped
trmk daruma oak 30 shipped
trmk geisha oak 30 shipped
monstera eternal dragon warrior 30 shipped
monstera kaonishi dragon warrior 30 shipped
take everything for sale and i'll knock off 100 for bundling ;-)
here is my wishlist for trades!
submitted by utsukishi to mechmarket [link] [comments]


2020.01.27 03:21 ixythings The tales of an university kevin

I've just discovered this subreddit and decided this will be my little oasis to vent about this kevin who's been making my unpaid job inssuferable.
I'm a University student and I'm also part of the student council of my school/career. Being part of the SC means to partly work as an guidance for every year freshmans, take care of their problems and every students problems, and a lot more stuff without being paid. We do get some benefits wich I thought were enough pay until the 2018 freshmans.
They were all okay. We hold a yearly event where we add new members to our student council team and we've been doing a "all accepted" policy for about 2 years and a half so basically anyone who expressed any interest in doing something good for the student sommunity would be automatically accepted. 1st mistake.
Here comes Kevin. There's not enough space in this post (and I don't have enough energy) to write all of what has been happening since I met him. I am not his friend. I do not like spending time near him and actively avoid him. But he always makes it so that everyone ends up involving in his daily shennanigans. To make this more readable (Also to protect my sanity) I will try to summarize most and the worst of his "events" in a list:
When the signing-up time for the next semester rolls around, the SC is the one in charge of organizing it. We always publish all of the information in our social media. The information is also printed and published in the school's gate. We have one week to sign-up in classes, and in order to do this we must do 3 different deposits in 3 different bank accounts. No deposits, no sing-up. Students have until friday, 2pm to enroll themselves in their classes, but, since it's first come first serve, normally people who wait too much won't get a chance to choose the exact classes they want to attend and in the exact schedule they prefer, they mostly have to deal with whaterever it's left. So, it's thursday night, and kevin messages me on facebook asking when are the sing-ups. I tell him they end tomorrow. He asks how does he do to sing-up. I send him the link to the information. He asks me to explain it in chat because he doesn't want to open the link. I say no and to leave me alone since I need to do some work. He sends me a HUGE message about how his life is so horrible, how no one loves him, how he doesn't understand why university it's so hard, etc. I tell him to just read the instructions in the post I linked and that it should help him because that's why we post it. I ended up leaving him in "read". (This conversation lasted for about 5 hours, but I'm summarizing it the best I can because the level of stupidity in here was godlike. If this gets enough attention I might consider uploading screenshots of it, but that'll also require me to translate them)
Next day I left early because I had work, but a friend filled me in and said Kevin showed up at 5pm with just one deposit, for the wrong amount, and got angry when he found out that there where no more spots available in the classes he had supposed to take. Then asked if they could just kick someone who had already and correctly singed-up so he could take the spot. He didn't understand why there were no spots available (I explained that to him the night before). When told that the sing-ups had ended at 2pm, he looked at his phone and said that it was only 3 hours after 2pm and the he could still sign-up because he was part of the SC.
A week later he showed up again, trying to sing-up to the next semester and asked my help. This time he was sure he could sing-up because he had all 3 deposits. None of the bank accounts on the deposits where the ones from the university. He explained that he had given the money to someone he had met on facebook and asked him to do the deposits for him because he had no internet (Even though he had been talking to them via facebook). I asked him if he had given the correct numbers of the university's bank accounts to this person and he said "No, i just told him to do the deposits".

That's all I can recall right now, and while writing this I just noticed how this guy has also achived to be some sort of male karen and kevin chimera. The holy grail of entitlement and stupidity. I now hate him even more.
EDIT: Someone pointed out, among other things, that I had some spelling mistakes. I corrected all that I could see but might've missed some. Another thing this person pointed out is that my story is bullshit because the way my education system works isn't the same as theirs. I realized 2 things: 1. I still have a lot to learn, I believed my english grammar was pretty good but now I'm not so sure. After re-reading my post for the first time after posting it I'm worried it isn't as clear I thought I made it. I'm also afraid I don't really understant quite well how the, uh, "studies part" of the language works. Words that I thought translated directly into the way english-speakers call it seem to be wrong or understanded in another way that isn't the one I want it to be understanded. So if anyone could kindly point me out and teach me the correct way to refer to this, I will be super thankfull. 2. In the comments I said that I live in a third-world country to explain why the proceedures to enroll in university seem so weird. While having breakfast I was going over and over this statement in my head, and realized that we may not be a third-world country completely, but we do lack a lot of social and technological improvements. The truth is my country it's in a weird spot, socially, economically, politically and historically. This means that while some things are super updated, and here you can buy the newest iphone, we struggle everyday with things like electricity, water and food. I don't know how usefull this information is, or if anyone cares, but I realized that I was wrong in my assumption of me living in a third-world country, and thought that I should somehow clarify before more people come over here and think I'm just bullshitting all of you. It's weird, and hard to explain, but if anyone's interested or confussed, I'd do my best to explain.
submitted by ixythings to StoriesAboutKevin [link] [comments]


2020.01.27 01:04 farwa786 Best 5 Ways to Find a Unicorn Woman for Couples

Sex is an essential part of every relationship, and a lot of couples are now coming up with various ways to spice up their sex life. One of the most adventurous ways that the majority of the couples opt for is a threesome with a unicorn.
A unicorn is a woman hired to engage in sex adventures with a couple. The majority of unicorn women are bisexual, thus can have sex with any couple setting. Well, if you are looking forward to having a threesome with a unicorn, the following are few tips to guide you in finding the perfect unicorn woman.
1. Search on the internet
With so many online unicorn dating site, you can easily find a suitable candidate to involve in your sexual fantasies with your partner. Just go to the search engines and look for unicorn dating sites available. From the websites, you will be provided with different categories of women and the kind of services they offer. Read through their profiles so you can be able to choose the woman who matches your needs as a couple. You can also find a unicorn(URL: http://www.threesomesites.org/unicorn-dating-sites.html) on various threesome websites like Ok cupid, or even Fetlife.
2. Outline what you want
Unicorns offer different services depending on what the couple is looking for. So, you have to be precise about the kind of sexual escapes you expect from the unicorn even before contacting or signing up on a website. All this discussion should be done among you as the couple before relaying them to the unicorn. Things to outline include; if you need one-off kind of relationship or regular meetups, what services would the unicorn bring to the table and the state of your relationship as a couple. Make sure to communicate the same details to the unicorn when you contact her.
3. Please get to know them first
Apart from focusing on getting the right unicorn to meet your sexual needs as a couple, you also need to make sure that you are having sex with someone safe. So, your safety counts a lot. Keeping in mind that these unicorns sleep with different people, getting to know first about their health status is crucial. So, invite her for a drink and have an in-depth conversation about their health. If you want to have unprotected sex, then consider getting tested first. Also, discuss the measures to be taken to prevent her from getting pregnant. Ensure she is on birth control. Note that if the unicorn you are communicating with does not cooperate on some of these discussions, you should consider getting another one.
4. Attend unicorn parties
Various clubs host unicorn oasis parties, and you can easily snag a unicorn in such a place. It is more convenient than other methods of searching for a unicorn since you get the opportunity to socialize with them one on one during the first meeting. You also have a chance to interact with plenty of women in such a place, making it easy to find a unicorn fast.
5. Employ excellent communication skills
The way you communicate with the unicorn on the first interaction determines if she will be interested in having a threesome with you or not. Keep in mind that unicorns are also humans and have feelings. So, if you talk with respect and treat them well, they will immediately agree to your needs as a couple. The key is to treat them well and not as objects of sex.
Conclusion
If you are planning to spice up your bedroom matters by involving a unicorn, use the above guide to help you find a unicorn. Unicorn dating site(URL: http://www.threesomesites.org/unicorn-dating-sites.html) offer categories of different unicorns for couples to choose from. So, know the kind of pleasure you are looking for as a couple before choosing a unicorn to contact.
submitted by farwa786 to u/farwa786 [link] [comments]


2020.01.06 00:36 Bellalion9 Feedback Wanted: Immortal Sim Story Based Completetionist Challenge

I'm trying to create a challenge where by the end your sim has completed all collections, maxed skills, all aspirations and maxed all careers while being a story based around your mysteriously immortal sim. Each section is supposes to take place over multiple years. All townies age normally while your sims stays as a young adult. Traits are not listed but can be changed throughout t he challenge as the player see fit.
I'm not finished yet but would love some feedback on how it is going so far! Anything I should add, remove or change? Thanks!
1.) In The Beginning...
Description
Let there be Sim! You awaken to find yourself in the woods. You have no memory and little money. You start living off the land as best as you can while meeting a few interesting characters along the way though you mostly stick to yourself.At first you spend most of your time foraging, fishing and trying to survive selling your herbal teas and foraged items. Eventually you are able to build yourself a nice little house and settle down for a bit. Your good friend the hermit eventually convinces you to start writing in hope that it will bring back memories of before you woke up in the woods. You find that you are a very good writer indeed and after a few years you have the money and the confidence to leave the woods and start exploring the world.
Location
Aspirations
Career
Skills
Collections/Creations
Optional
2.) Half Baked
Description
Out in the real world at last! After having to garden and cook fresh food everyday while living in the woods you decide that the best way to make your way in the world would be to put those skills to good use and open up a bakery & flower shop with money you had saved from your books sold. You focus the majority of your on your business and slowly grow it. You are getting better at socializing and coming out of your shell. Eventually baking is a small pond and you are growing into a pretty big fish. Time to upgrade from a small bakery to a prize winning restaurant. Can't be that hard right! This is also a time in your life when you start to notice something interesting and a bit terrifying. It's been a few decades since you first woke up without memory in the woods yet you don’t even look a day older. You are watching everyone around you get older, move on with their lives, even a few have died yet here you are the same as always. You wonder what this could mean for your future?
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
3.) Getting Real Learned
Description
Once it becomes glaringly obvious that for some unknown reason you seem to be immortal you are overcome with extreme unrest and anxiety. Where do we go from here? Are you stuck managing a restaurant while all of you friends die? No! You have something they don't have. Infinite time. And you set yourself a goal to accomplish everything the world has to offer you. After all it seems you and the world are the only things that are going to be a constant together. You figure the best place to start learning as much as you can is University so off you go! You have no doubt that you will physically fit in since you haven't aged a bit but lets hope you are still "hip"and "with it" to hang with the kids.
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collection
Skills
Optional
4.) Horse Doctors are Real Doctors Too
Description
Well it seems like you have learned everything that you can learn with a formal education so it's time to start putting all the knowledge in you noggin to good use. What to be, what to be. Well you like animals and you already have experience running a business sooo let's start off being a vet! You get to work setting up the best (and maybe only) veterinarian hospital in a small sleepy coastal town not far from where you went to college and train show dogs on the side. Work that audience fluffy! But then one fateful day someone said that performing heart surgery on a horse was less difficult than a human. The audacity! You'll show them! Time to switch gears and becoming a human doctor. Can't be that different right? So off you go into the ER, setting bones, running test and performing heart surgery (sometimes accidentally when you should be delivering a baby...) but just like everything else once you reach the top you start to feel that itch again. Plus it's about time for you to leave town before people notice you are seemingly immortal and start to ask questions. You take a moment to think about what you want to do next. Well you are really good at the technical side of medicine. Running test, doing research, that sort of thing. Hey! Maybe it's time to go from the practical side of medicine to the research side. Time to be a scientist! medicine to the research side. Time to be a scientist!
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
5.) Bill Nye the Science Guy
Description
Off to explore the endless possibilities of science! There seems to be an endless amount to learn and you are loving it. This will keep you occupied for a few decades at least. You focus on medical science for a few good years but one night you couldn't sleep so decided to take a late night walk through the desert in your backyard. The sky was ablaze with stars so bright they lit up the area like a nighttime sun. It was then that you decided to set your scientific sights on the cosmos. Over the next few years you create amazing technologies that allow you to explore more of the cosmos than anyone before but it's not enough for you. You are tired of just looking up at the sky, you need to be in it. You are easily able to get a job in aerospace with your skills and are soon off to the stars where you encounter untold adventure. And bring home a few mysterious creatures in the process. But time slowly passes on and you once again realize that it is time to move on.
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
6.) Hello Mr. Anderson
Description
You loved being an astronaut so much and are more than a little sad to see your time exploring the cosmos over but the astronaut community is small and you suspecting more than a few people were starting to get suspicious that you weren't aging. You know as a scientist that other scientists would love to get their hands on the cure to mortality and some would stop at nothing to do so. Time to lay low for awhile. You notice that a few tech companies are starting up in your area to you slowly slip away behind a computer. You still miss the days you use to tinker around with your rocket ships but can't have one of those in your backyard anymore without definitely bringing some attention to you. I mean it was weird enough that you had one in your backyard as an astronaut! In your spare time you tinker with your robotics skills that you picked up in college. Life was getting a little lonely while you were laying low as well so why not just build yourself a friend...yup jusssst friends.Your career slowly but naturally transitions to engineering and you are so glad to be back to working with your hands for a living and after some time passes you are able to stop laying low and live normally again. Everything is going so well for you! Your career is great, your friends are amazing and you are having the best time! .... And then you see him. A man in a black suit, black glasses in a black van. He follows you around for a few days. You begin to suspect that you cover has been blown and the science community has come to kidnap you and study your body in a lab for eternity. And then it happens, you get pushed into the van one night and driven away.
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
7.) I've Seen Stranger Things
Description
A few hours later the van stops. The door opens and military personnel take you out. You realize as you are being escorted into a building that you are on some sort of military base. Are they going to be doing military testing on you?! You are escorted into a room where you are told why you were taken. With a sigh of relief you find out that the military is only aware of your technical background yet nothing about your immortality. Apparently something very strange is going on in a town called... StrangeVille (shocking I know) and they need your help to try to figure out what is happening and sort it out. Easy you say! And get to work although things end up not being what they seem. You eventually solve the mystery and are hail a hero of the town. You have come to like the place after getting to know some locals so after a few more years in the military you decide to settle down for awhile and help out in the small town police department. You quickly move up in the police department since let's face it, you are like a million times more qualified than most of them. Heck most of your coworkers weren't even born when you were in college. Eventually you are tapped to become a secret agent and decide heck why not. However, one day you are approached by one of your higher ups and given an opportunity you couldn't pass up. It was to do something... well something technically evil... that's not you! Or is it? And what is evil anyways? You've been alive long enough to know that good vs. evil are just human constructs. Why shouldn't you get ahead? After all you have forever ahead of you. Why stop yourself from getting what you want when everyone else will die? You've helped enough people out. Now it's your turn to be a villain!
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
8.) Are we the Baddies?
Description
No more Mister Nice Guy! You decide that you no longer want to be told what to do by someone higher up. You want to be the Boss. So you get a gang of ragtag minor criminals together and start getting to work. And you are good at it. Really good. You feel more alive than you have in decades. Every heist makes you feel invincible. Who knew being bad could feel so good! You realize you are a master strategist and love sitting down for hours at a time plotting out the game plan for each new job. You decide the best way to hide your criminal activities is to set up a business front just so everything looks legit. You decide the best way to hide huge amounts of money flowing in and out is to make it look like you own an investment firm so that's what you set up. The thing is that no soon after setting up your fake investment firm you realize that you are making more money on the fake business than you were as a criminal. So I guess it looks like you are a legit business person now. You become a pillar of the community and people in your town start really looking up to you. When a local political seat opens up you decide on a whim to run for it and win! You spend the next few decades turning the economy around and building your small city up to something you can really be proud of. But tragedy strikes. Just when you had reached the top one of your old crime partners gets arrested for a petty crime and decides to spill the beans about you for a plea bargain. Time to skip town. Heck it's time to skip the country!
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
9.) Blowing Tombs Up Isn't Archaeology!
Description
Off to Selvadore you go to once again lay low. At first you miss home and find it hard to unwind and stop thinking about all the work you left behind. You’ve been working one job or the other for decades now maybe even centuries. You lost track a long time ago. Thinking about it you fall into a small depression thinking about all the friends and maybe even lovers you’ve had that are long dead now. What's the point of living when you just end up losing so much? No enough of that. This is why you work so hard. To keep your mind occupied and looking forward. But it's not like this small town nay village in the jungle has a booming economy you can just find yourself a job in. No, you will have to find your own hobby to keep you mind occupied. After talking to one of the workers at the local museum you decide to try your hand at archaeology. You’ve been doing technical work for so long that you forgot how much you enjoyed your art and history classes back in your long gone college days. So you buy everything you will need for a long archaeology expedition and off you go. For years you fully immerse yourself in the Selvadorardian culture. Befriending the locals, learning their customs and culture. You end up being the go-to expert on the lost Omiscan Artifacts even going back to you writing days and writing a few respected history textbooks on the subject. You almost feel like you could live her forever but the reality of the matter is that as much as you were loved by the Selvadorian you knew that they were a superstitious culture and would most likely not take kindly once they found out that you were immortal. So with a heavy heart you pack up your things, say goodbye and head to the city.
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
10.) F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
Description
You decide that after so much time in a small village that moving to the big city would be a refreshing change and what city is being and more vibrant than San Myshuno! You realize quickly that the best way to fit in is to join the young adult scene full of bright young people moving to the city after college to find their destiny. You chose a small but quaint fixer upper apartment and get a job at a restaurant as a bartender. You end up falling in with a lovely little friend group which soon becomes like family to you. Nothing brings people closer than being alone in a big city and relying on their friends for fun, reassurance and advice. You spend the vast majority of your time hanging out, exploring the city and singing karaoke.In your free time you have converted a small space in your apartment into a painting studio. You are reconnecting with your artistic and are loving it. Eventually you get so good that you are making enough money to quit your job as a bartender and start painting full time! You even get a small following and the art museum asks you to be a part of one of their joint artist exhibitions. While you are at the exhibition you start talking about your thoughts on the other painting with the art director. By the end of the night you are shocked when the director asks if you want a job as an art critic which you gladly accept. You are once again amazed by how lucky you are. For the first time you feel like you actually have a family. You are surrounded by friends, art, food and it feels like the fun will never end. Until one night it does change and not only are you forced to leave everything behind once again but everything you thought you knew about the world after living for so long is turned on its head.
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
11.) Better Love Story than Twilight
Description
As you were walking home from a late night at a local art gallery exhibition you hear what sounds like wings flapping by your head. You turn quickly but there is nothing there. You still feel something within you that is uneasy, an unknown fear. You begin to walk more briskly but the fear is growing. You burst into a run and then a full on sprint. And that's when you feel it. Someone grabs you faster than should be possible from behind and you feel a sting on your neck. As you slowly sink to the ground and begin to lose consciousness you get a look at your attacker. Their mouth is stained red with your blood and their eyes are dead black. You wake up slumped against a wall in a dark alley not far from where you were attacked. It is still dark out and you find a note it your lap. Its say that for some reason they have decided to spare you but to get inside before the morning. There are further instructions to make your way to a town called Forgotten Hollow if you want to protect the people you love. And so the next night you leave a note for your friends and head off. In Forgotten Hollow you learn what has happened. You have been turned into a vampire and will soon begin to change and feed on the living. Your whole world is turned upside down. On the upside you are finally surrounded by the first people in the world to know what it is like to be immortal. You meet people that are even older than you are and can talk openly about everything you have been through which becomes a weight takes so much weight off your shoulders. However there is a downside. You are no longer human and you feel so much uncontrolled anger inside of you. To get it under control you turn to music. But even that only plugs the hole up temporarily. Over time you become a more and more powerful vampire but you feel hollow inside and that's when it hits you. What you miss so much was having a family like you felt when living in San Myshuno. And so you get to biting. Growing your own vampire family. And again for awhile you feel whole. But one day you find in a dusty tome something thought lost, something all vampires thought was a myth but desperately wanted. The recipe for the cure to vampirism. Bottoms up baby! Time to get my tan back!
Location
-Forgotten Hollow
Aspiration
Career
Collection
Skills
12.) Here Comes the Sun
Location
Aspiration
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
13.) Semi Charmed Kind of Life
Locations
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
14.) Almost Famous
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
15.) Panic at the Disco!
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
16.) Family Matters
Location
Aspirations
Career
Collections
Skills
Optional
submitted by Bellalion9 to thesims [link] [comments]


2019.12.13 23:28 ceetee15 The guitar interview: Noel Gallagher

https://guitar.com/features/interviews/noel-gallagher-high-flying-birds-oasis-interview/
12th December 2019
“I’m supposed to go to this gig tonight in Brooklyn, but I don’t know,” Noel Gallagher says, his voice trailing off as we sit down for coffee in the Penthouse café of his Midtown Manhattan hotel, one rainy afternoon recently.
Even Noel Gallagher doesn’t want to go to Brooklyn.
We’ve encountered Gallagher many times since he left Oasis, but he seems more relaxed than ever this time, as we chat about shared interests and mutual friends. In person Noel is short, even slight. But he’s an intense presence, too. Wearing black trousers and an expensive-looking black t-shirt, topped with a gold chain and pendant, it’s the ever-present sunglasses that are seemingly there to keep you in your place.
“I picked them up cheap at Harvey Nichols,” he says, proudly, when we enquire, lightening the mood considerably.
We’re here to talk guitars, and his new EP, Blue Moon Rising, the third in a series that marks a stark departure from his Oasis days, his early solo work, or even his latest, Dave Holmes-produced Who Built The Moon?, from 2017. A mixture of Ibiza-style dance tracks and Bowie, Stones Roses, and Smiths-influenced pop songs, there’s been a love/hate response from his rabid audience.
“I don’t really care,” he waves us off, when we mention the negative chatter amongst some of his oldest, and once loyal, fans. “I’m not really making music for them, am I?”
It’s true, if his brother Liam has made no secret of trying to capture the Oasis nostalgia market with his two solo albums and, especially, his live shows, the elder Gallagher has flexed his creative muscles repeatedly, even on his first solo album, 2013’s Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds.
“Before I started that record, I had acoustic demos, and I listened to them for quite a while before I actually recorded them, so by the time I got in there to record them, I had a fair idea of what I wanted to do with them,” he explains. “But I never thought I was making that record for my fans. I was just trying to serve the songs. On the second record, when I played people The Right Stuff, they said, ‘Well, that’s a bit different.’ But I didn’t care. If it’s a good recording of a great tune, that’s all that matters to me. I wasn’t thinking ‘Wow, this will really fuck with people.’ I wouldn’t do that. Because all that matters to me is the song.”
Don’t look back?
Chasing Yesterday, from 2015, was indeed a departure, but still hewed pretty closely to the past in many respects. Who Built The Moon? changed all that. While he’d worked with The Chemical Brothers in the 90s, and never made a secret of his love for Manchester’s Haçienda-era club music, many diehard fans were up in arms at Gallagher’s seeming creative left turn. But for him, it was just part of the process of following the example of his friend and mentor, Paul Weller.
“When I went to make the last album with David Holmes, he famously said to me on the second day, ‘Do you have to play the guitar all the time?’” Gallagher says with a laugh. “I looked at him and I thought, ‘Google my fucking name there for a second.’ I said, ‘What else am I going to play?’ He said, ‘Can you play keyboards?’ I said ‘No.’ And he said, ‘Great. You’re going to play keyboards.’ It seemed mad, but once I’d written a few songs like that, it was actually really fucking liberating. So when I use guitar now, like on the new EPs, they just kind of drift in and out.”
Although the new music he’s making is self-produced, he says he can’t be bothered with the technical aspects of the recording process. “A lot of these new tracks started with a bassline,” he explains. “And I’ll fiddle with the gadgets, because I like a box that makes noise. But I’ll instantly throw the manual away, because it’s just jargon and gobbledygook for me. I can’t fucking stand any of it. I’ll spend an hour trying to switch it on.
“I could eventually work out how to use it, but I’ve got this engineer, Paul Stacey, and this other guy Emre Ramazanoglu, who are absolute fucking wizards on the computer. Emre, he’s not showing me how to do stuff, but when I have these outlandish ideas and I ask, ‘Is it possible to do that?’ – pew – it’s done. Sounds amazing. Like, wow. I’ve been missing out sitting there strumming this fucking J-200.”
Of course, second only to his prowess as a world-class songwriter, Gallagher is known as a formidable melodic guitarist, with an eclectic and fearsome collection of vintage and bespoke guitars.
“Gibson is doing a signature model of that one,” Gallagher says, when we ask about the J-200 he was referring to, the infamous sunburst model from his Oasis days, with the Adidas sticker above the soundhole. “I sent it there to be photographed, the grain and the whole thing. It’s not even a J-200, you know. It’s a J-150 that I just took off the shelf in London, played it, and I was like, ‘Yeah, I’ll take it.’ I never thought anything of it. But I’ve written some great fucking songs on that guitar.
“They only made them for a couple of years. In fact, just this year I found a blonde one, which I got off Reverb.com. I try not to buy guitars off the internet, because you’ve got to fucking hold them first, and it was a bit expensive, but I thought, ‘Fuck it. I’ll just go for it.’ It arrived and it was amazing. I’m playing it on tour with U2.”
Of course, he’s also got several guitars that pal, and early Oasis booster, Johnny Marr lent him back in the earliest days of the band. “I never gave them back,” he says with a chuckle. “He’s given me three or four guitars over the years. The first one was a Les Paul that belonged to Pete Townshend. That one got damaged, so then he gave me the black Les Paul that was the guitar he used on The Queen Is Dead. And he gave me a Stratocaster that I wrote and recorded Don’t Look Back In Anger on. He’s not getting them now.”
And while he used to arrive at the studio in the Oasis days to an array of guitars to choose from – culled from his formidable arsenal, based on his mood at the time, or the sonic direction in which he felt the songs he had written should go – now he says he simply takes one guitar and a bag of pedals.
Back to basics
“I’m making a different kind of music now,” Noel Gallagher confesses. “Who Built The Moon? is all a Nash Strat and a brand-new Fender silverface Princeton. And on the three new EPs that I’ve done, I used one guitar. It’s The Edge’s signature Strat, by Fender. It’s fucking amazing. It’s a copy of his 1974 Strat, the black one. And it’s hands-down one of the best guitars I’ve ever played in my life.”
At home, Gallagher confesses, he likes to rotate his guitars.
“I don’t have a go-to guitar that I write on,” he explains. “I’ll have a guitar for a couple of years, but then it’ll feel like it’s all used up, so I’ll send that one back to my lock-up. I’ve got a lot there, so I’ll just pick one at random, because I think all guitars have got songs in them. Sometimes I’ll want to have an acoustic. For a while it was a Nash Strat. Lately I’ve been playing bass around the house, endlessly, and that’s how most of the new songs started, in fact.”
On tour, along with the blonde Gibson J-150, Gallagher is in some ways back to basics. “I’m playing Jazzmasters, both by Fender and Nash,” he says. “You know, I was never a fan of Strats or offset guitars. But I was on tour, and I saw this Nash Jazzmaster – a natural one – and I bought it. And I’ve since got to know Bill Nash, and now I’ve got about 20 of his guitars. And I swear by them. His Teles are amazing, too. And Fender’s new Vintera series is really good. I don’t like the far-out fucking designs. I like the real simple ones.”
So is there one guitar, we ask Gallagher as we wrap up, that he simply couldn’t live without?
“My favourite electric guitar I bought in the 90s,” he says without hesitation. “It’s the 1960 Gibson 355 that I played in Oasis. I don’t play it so much nowadays, because the music I’m writing is different and I’m going for a different sound. But if push came to shove, that guitar is priceless for the amount of tunes that I wrote on it.”
As we part, we ask Gallagher if, now that the third of the trifecta of EPs is due for imminent release, we’ll be getting an album proper from him in the near future.
“Apart from the odd festival date next summer, I think I’m going to try to take 2020 off,” he tells us. “Now, that being said, my missus may have something to say about that. Plus, I’ve got a load of songs, they’ve just got to be knocked into shape. On the way down to meet you I was working on them on my iPad, making another list. I have a list of things – ‘I must do that’ – but actually, once the Christmas EP is out of the way, I’m going to take a step back.
“I just need to get away from it for a bit. So I don’t think I’ll start to make an album seriously till 2021. The thing is, there’s a generation now, between 15 and 18 years old, that have just got into the Oasis thing. They’ve never heard most of what I’ve done, that’s for sure. But really, they have no idea what was going on before. So for those little pricks, I’ll take great pleasure in ruining their days.”
For more information about Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds, click here.
submitted by ceetee15 to oasis [link] [comments]


2019.12.06 15:59 your_fish_monger What do you as a buyer in a mismanaged group buy (like Modern M0110 by Desk Candy) that goes off the rails?

I am relatively new to this hobby. I bought my first mech, a Varmilo MX Blue board, about two years ago. Since then, I have wandered pretty far down the rabbit hole. I've joined a handful of succesful Massdrop/Drop group buys for different switches or key cap sets, bought soldering irons, and spent hours individually hand lubing Holy Panda switches.
But the first time I ever trusted a complete stranger on the internet with hundreds of dollars was when I sent $513 to janglad and deskcandy on July 5th 2018 to join their Modern M0110 group buy.
They marketed the hell out of the group buy here, with beautiful renders and no fewer than seventeen Reddit posts about the kit, going back to at least September 2017.
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The original groupbuy thread on geekhack and posts here on Reddit confirmed that the original delivery date on the cases back to janglad and deskcandy was supposed to be August of 2018.
Delays in these things are to be expected. Shit happens.
But the expectation from myself an the growing fury in the geekhack thread is that the GB runners are open and transparent about updates. Tell us how many boards have shipped. Tell us what to expect over the next week or two. Give us any kind of update. We are no longer getting that.
As of today, 18 months after the GB, I think we can confirm that one, maybe two boards have been sent out in that GeekHack thread, the most recent confirmation being in September 2019. And it was arguably the most complex of the boards, with a pink cerakote finish that did not even match the renders in the IC/GB (which is a different story for a different day). That buyer was refunded.
But that does not leave the dozens (?) or hundreds (?) of us who have put our cash on the line without anything to show for it. Worst of all, janglad and deskcandy have gone silent on the groupbuy. They made it seem two months ago that dozens of boards were about to be sent out, but none of them have.
They are not answering emails. They are not answering PMs on Reddit or geekhack. And they have ghosted the GB thread on geekhack despite repeated calls for updates and transparency.
My call to this group here: what do those of us in the group buy do at this point? I appreciate that both Reddit and geekhack have PSAs and warnings about the risks of group buys--warnings that I will certainly heed more strongly in the future.
But I am open to any suggestions here. What can we do? We have asked for regular transparency, ongoing updates, and some of us, even full refunds. But we are being stonewalled. Do I just assume at this point that all of us are out up to $1,000 each? Are we just being scammed here?
submitted by your_fish_monger to MechanicalKeyboards [link] [comments]


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